a carrot walks into a bar, carrots cant walk for they do not have legs.

Whats ironic about the Facebook "like" button? Nothing

A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released at a nearby park.

What happens if you're in the middle of counting towels? You finish counting your towels.

Knock knock.* Who is it? The police. We have news that your daughter was molested and will never been seen again for the man who stole her has takin' her out of our jurisdiction.

Miscarriages.

Why did the boy bump into a pole. He was sleep-walking with his eyes closed.

No.

How are a plum and a rabbit alike? Theyre both purple except for the rabbit.

why did stacey marry bally because she loves him

Is you refrigerator running? That's odd you should call the cops about that one!

how do you know if a chinese man has been in you house? your homework is done

A man walks into a bar, he then falls unconscious and driven safely to the hospital.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

What's the difference between The Holocaust and baking pizza? Pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

A. Knock-knock. B. Who's there? A. Hey, your doorbell's broken.

What did the goat say to the dolphin dogs don't lay eggs

why did the football coach go to the bank? to make a deposit into his account

What did Jesus say to Moses? Jesus isn't real. Moses replied, "Do you think I'm stupid? I'm talking to him!"

How do racist jokes start? Generally with a racially insensitive stereotype.

Why does Magic Johnson always use extra large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

Q: who is the worst person to ever post "jokes" on anti-joke.com? A: ryan valee

Why can't Helen Keller drive a bus? Because she's dead

Listen I know you're a cat and I'm a cat but I know we can be friends

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...