What do you get when you multiply a trillion times a billion times a quintillion? A huge ass number.

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Why would you throw a hooker in a lake? To go fishing

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What do you call a group of asians? China.

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What's the difference between a single mom and a stripper? Job status.

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What do you call a person with no legs, no arms, no eyes, and no heart? Well he'd be dead wouldn't he?

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Why did the man jump off the bridge? He was clinically depressed and wanted to commite suicide

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An Italian, a black man, and a small child walk into a bar. Shortly after it blew up due to a gas leak. 67 people perished.

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Jack Oliver has a Bowl.

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husband : honey , can i have stuff candy wife : no husband : can i have milk and cookies wife : what kind of milk wink wink husband 2% you pervert

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What do you call a pickle that is sad? A pickle!????

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Q:how do you brighten up a room? A:you turn on the lamps

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What do you call a bad joke? Unfunny.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have clamidia Because Polly shat on me.

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Why didn't Dave buy his wife a watch for her birthday? Because she already had one.

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Why did the blonde stare at the carton of orange juice? Because she was lost in her thoughts about her dead husband, and how much he loved orange juice.

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A man was walking outside at night and he heard thunder and saw lighting so he took out a metal pole.

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The outside of my house is painted yellow.

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why did abby get fired? cause she showed allie anti joke.com!!! :0

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Why did sally fall off her swingset? Because she was hit with a refrigerator.

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A man suffering from terminal cancer walks into a bar and orders a soda because his doctor advised him not to drink. The bartender and others in the establishment are completely unaware of his disability.

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A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin. However, the skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret.

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What is x (4 - 10) + 6879 (333) x 678912345 - 9.87537 when x equals pi? Answer: YOUR FACE!!!

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Why did little Sarah fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sarah

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What do you call a man who gets off the train at Willoughby? Dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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