whats better than a dead baby..... wait..... whats worse than a dead baby...... never mind its not that funny anymore

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What do you call a bad joke? Unfunny.

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Q:how do you brighten up a room? A:you turn on the lamps

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have clamidia Because Polly shat on me.

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Why didn't Dave buy his wife a watch for her birthday? Because she already had one.

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A man was walking outside at night and he heard thunder and saw lighting so he took out a metal pole.

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Why did the blonde stare at the carton of orange juice? Because she was lost in her thoughts about her dead husband, and how much he loved orange juice.

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The outside of my house is painted yellow.

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why did abby get fired? cause she showed allie anti joke.com!!! :0

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A man suffering from terminal cancer walks into a bar and orders a soda because his doctor advised him not to drink. The bartender and others in the establishment are completely unaware of his disability.

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A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin. However, the skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret.

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Why did little Sarah fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Sarah

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What is x (4 - 10) + 6879 (333) x 678912345 - 9.87537 when x equals pi? Answer: YOUR FACE!!!

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What do you call a man who gets off the train at Willoughby? Dead

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chuck norris

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Q.)What did the man say to the toilet A.) Hi Jon

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Whats worse than having no mother? Having no mother and father, enabling you to have to support a family at the age of 12, using the allowance that your parents are supposed to give you once a week.

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There was a deaf guy who heard a mute guy tell someone that a blind guy saw a guy with no legs win the marathon

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Why did the Jew pick up the penny? Because he dropped it

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What did the homosexual say to the purse walking down the street? - I'm a homosexual.

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Think of a number between -1 and 1 That's how many friends you have

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Hitler

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What's blue and screams when you look at it Idk that's why I'm asking you

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Q: How many Jews can fit in a four door Sudan? A: Two in the front, three in the back, six million in the ash trey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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