Jerry Rice is walking down the streets of San Francisco when all of a sudden he hears sirens coming from the next street down. He hurries down the road to see what's happening and sees a huge fire engulfing a 10 story building. And on the top floor, a lady is leaning out the window shouting to the firemen below. FIREMAN: Come on, lady, jump. We have the tarp here, we'll be able to catch you. LADY: No....I can't. My baby, my baby is up here. FIREMAN: Throw the baby down, we'll catch him. LADY: No, you'll miss. I can't leave my baby. Jerry sees this and steps forward. "Hey, I think I can help. Let me have the bullhorn." JERRY: Hey lady, I'm Jerry Rice, the wide receiver for the San Francisco 49er's. I'm the best wide receiver in the game, throw your baby down and I'll catch him, this is what I do for a living. Being a 49er fan herself, the lady recognizes Jerry and throws her baby down to him. Just as she throws it though, a huge gust of wind comes and takes the baby and starts to blow him off course. Jerry sees this and takes off after the baby. He hurdles the line closing off the area, fights through the crowd, dodges a couple of fire fighters, jumps over the car, and dives forward, just making a fingertip catch of the baby. The crowd around him goes wild and starts cheering his amazing catch. So Jerry jumps to his feet, raises his finger into the air, does a two step and then spikes the baby. If you have any dead baby jokes that are not here, I want to hear from you. Email me your dead baby jokes at skitzopathik@hotmail.com and I'll add them to this page.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Jack Oliver has a Bowl.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do homeless people get for Christmas? Nothing, they are homeless.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why was the man running from the cops? His car broke down.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the cow puke up his grass? Because it is necessary so that the cow can re-chew his food to aid with the digestion.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How did two Jews react when they saw a quarter on the sidewalk? They agreed to donate it to charity.

thumb_up thumb_down

A man walks into a bar. His alcoholism is destroying his family.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why didn't Dave buy his wife a watch for her birthday? Because she already had one.

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are red Violets are blue And so does your mom…

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man suffering from terminal cancer walks into a bar and orders a soda because his doctor advised him not to drink. The bartender and others in the establishment are completely unaware of his disability.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin. However, the skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you keep black people out of your back yard? Just like you would anyone else: buy a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did abby get fired? cause she showed allie anti joke.com!!! :0

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did one wall say to the other? Nothing, walls don't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing... she's ugly

thumb_up thumb_down -6

chuck norris

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Two men are sitting in a bar. They finish their drinks and pay the bill before leaving.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Three men walked into a metal pole

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: where did the pickle live? A: In the desert

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q.)What did the man say to the toilet A.) Hi Jon

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How come the twin boys wanted to climb a tree for fun today? Because They both wanted to commit suicide...

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Your mother is so fat that unfortunately she can not fit into her picture for her passport and is not allowed to leave the country to go visit her dying mother.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops