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hahaha

Whats the definition of helpless? A quadraplegic in a washing machine

What does a ghost get when he watches pornography? A boner

What time is it? 10:58

What is the difference between Terri Schaivo and a basket of rotting vegetables? The rotting vegetables aren't edible.

I love boobs

What did the cat say when it jumped into the cardboard box? Meow

I am a real homosexual

(insert Anti-Joke here)

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a mammal.

How do you know when a Mexican has died? Well based on the large mass of people inside and outside the funeral home who mostly seem to be of a mexican background and cultue, it would be safe to say that those are his/her friends and family who care deeply about them and therefore you could conclude that a Mexican person probably passed away. It's actually quite sad and going to be a rough few days for those closely connected to the person who died.

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

Wat do u call a 2 root tall scottidh man named max? Max

What's green and has wheels? Grass...I was just lying about the wheels.

What do you call a bunch of balck men running down a hill. A bunch of balck men running down a hill.

a women picks up her phone and screams! There were 3 missed calls from her mother-inlaw

Last night I had consensual sex with my long term girlfriend in the missionary position. It lasted approximately 4 minutes before I ejaculated into the durex extra safe condom.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenia, and don't have any friends

What's worse than a dead baby? A dead puppy.

A baby seal walks into a club.

I had a dream I watched Inception.

Q:Where does a woman work at if she has a job? A: IHOP!!!

Why are Chinese people only allowed one child? Because their government states so.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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