Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? I stapled it to the first monkey!

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If a midget is mentally retarded and always late for work, is it okay to call him a little tardy?

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3 ducks are sitting in a pond. one with blonde feathers. one with brown feathers, and one with white feathers. A Transvestite Inbred Donkey Man kills them instantly.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Let Me In. Let Me In Who? Let Me In or I Will Kill You Tomorrow!

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your mamas so old, her social security number is 1!

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What do you call someone who can't move their arms or their legs A quadriplegic

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What's better than winning the Silver Medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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nock nock " whos there" , "open the door and you will see

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running. From the forest. That hell hole. He had got away, but he could remember. The darkness. The silence. Until the unmistakable scream of the guns and then- The Running. The Screaming. The Blood, oh the blood. Seeing Charlie. Oh, that damned soul Charlie. The bullet went right- But that was long ago. So long. But sometimes, in the silence, Chicken remembers. The Running. The Screaming. The Blood. And he screams.

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Nice legs, what time do they open the free bar, I'd like to by you a drink.

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In Soviet Russia! People were much more finacially secure than they are now.

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anus soup

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Roses are red, stones are gray, this poem is obvious, YOU DONT SAY??

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How do you get a bunch of Pokémon onto a bus? You tell them to ride a bus

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A van drives into a car. An hour earlier, the man who was driving the van walked into a bar.

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

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Lacrosse

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Q: What's worse then stubbing your toe? A: Coming home from school and your house is burnt down and your whole family is dead.

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If life gives you melons ... You might be dyslexic

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IF circles are squares and squares are purple and i dont know what im talking about does that make all potatoes orange?

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Why did the kids stop playing tag? Because the boy was "it" was kidnapped and never seen again

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

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Your mom is so fat, she has diabetes.

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What's the difference between zev hatis and a dwarf Nothing. They are both midgets and are going to die by the age of 25

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops