An elderly lady walks into an elevator. She falls over and I kick her in the head.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken probably crossed the road because of some sort of impulse or external stimuli (most likely a bug or a worm located on the other side of the road) in which he or she responded to by proceeding to cross the road in order to get to the other side as chickens have a sense of cause to effect in which the effect would be consuming the bug or other living life form.

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What do a comb and a guitar have in common? Neither of them can climb trees.

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Why did the chicken cross the road it was out of its coop

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One day, Little Timmy asked his mother this question, "Mommy, why are boys and girls different?" She responded, "You're adopted and Santa Claus is dead."

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What do divorce and a loose bear in a zoo have in common? They both tear families apart

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What's huge, gray, and has a trunk and wings. An elephant with wings glued to it.

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What do you call a dragon that doesn't breathe fire? A Griffin.

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Why do women where make-up and perfume? because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7... Because 7 raped her little sister

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What did Tommy's father tell him on Christmas? Nothing, he was violently stabbed to death on Christmas Eve.

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What is 18 inches long and makes a woman scream all night? Crib death.

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What do you call an elderly women who after the death of her late husband had many enconters witb men? A whore.

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Slavery

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I had sex with the Earth, and out came global warming...Imagine what will happen if i had sex with Obama?

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A jew and a black man walk into a bar the black man orders a screwdriver. The jrw asks him why did you order a screw driver.? The black man answer black:I enjoy screw drivers.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a sledgehammer. The other one's a watermelon

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Why did our black president put a porch swing on the white house? He likes to swing.

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Im getting sick of holocaust jokes cant you Nazi Annefrankly they are dumb

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Come in!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running. From the forest. That hell hole. He had got away, but he could remember. The darkness. The silence. Until the unmistakable scream of the guns and then- The Running. The Screaming. The Blood, oh the blood. Seeing Charlie. Oh, that damned soul Charlie. The bullet went right- But that was long ago. So long. But sometimes, in the silence, Chicken remembers. The Running. The Screaming. The Blood. And he screams.

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Why did Bob the Builder die? I threw a fridge at him

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whats the difference between santa claus and jewish people santa claus goes down the chimney and jewish people go up

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Today I had sex with a married man, but thats OK he's my husband

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops