Why did the hooker go to the bathroom? Because she just exchanged sex for money and was cleaning herself up for her next trick.

ME: HEY ZACH DO YOU KNOW WHO LIKES YOU................... ZACH: NO!... WHO.... ME: DO YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW??? ZACH:....YEAH!!!!!!!!!! ME: OKAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY NOBODY!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

This post contains NOTHING.

9:11 make a wish

Q: why did sally fall off the swing A: she had no arms A:knock knock Q:who is there A:not sally

What's the difference between zev hatis and a dwarf Nothing. They are both midgets and are going to die by the age of 25

what did the man with no legs get for Christmas? A piano

Why are we posting shit jokes on here? Because we can't drink!

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He removes the piece of lingerie from his face and continues shopping for clothes.

What do you call a black man who flies planes? A pilot, what do you call him you freaking racist!?!?!?!?!?

What's green, fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree and lands on you, you'd die? A pool table.

What is the same about a plum and an elephant? They're both grey except the plum

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

A Man walks into a bar and orders a scotch. His alcoholism is tearing his family apart

jack shine has boobs

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenia, and don't have any friends

This one time at band camp....I put a flute in it's proper storage compartment.

Your momma is so fat that the late, great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook her breasts for clocks

Adam knocks on the door. Eve: who is it? Adam: Don't be silly, just open the f*cking door.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I kicked it.

whats worse then finding a finger in your soup? - being a cook and losing a finger

What was the hardest part about the orphanage burning down? My cock.

Women

Baseball

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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