Why did the man go to the restaurant? Because he wanted to get some food.

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A purple kangaroo hops into a bar. There is no such thing as a purple kangaroo. The end.

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Tiger Woods is an American professional golfer whose achievements to date rank him among the most successful golfers of all time and Santa Claus is a very jolly fellow who brings gifts to the homes of the good children during the late evening and overnight hours of Christmas Eve.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, and have a stimulating discussion about economics

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What type of movies do pirates watch? None they are on a boat!

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What was the latino gardener doing? Working hard to keep his job in these tough economic times.

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Why does my girlfriend pee standing up? Because he is a man.

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yo mamma so fat she seen a yellow train full of white people and she said stop that twinkie

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What is black, white, and red all over? Obviusly a sunburned panguin.

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Q: What did the Miracle Whip say when the refrigerator door was opened? A: Nothing. Miracle Whip cannot speak.

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What is the difference between you and Chuck Norris? You're reading this and he's probably doing something productive.

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knock, knock, TRICK OR TREAT

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Hodor

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- If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together. - You don't need to because N and O are already together. - Then maybe a cyber-relationship would work. - Why ? - Look at your keyboard, U and I are next to each other.

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"Oh yeah?!" "Yeah!" "You wanna go?!" "No, sorry. I got plans." (walks away)

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For as long as i can remember, i've had memories

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Why did the white man rub the black man's hair for good luck? Because it's good luck to rub a black man's hair.

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How do you starve colored people? deny them food stamps

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what do you call someone that is dying of malaria? someone that should consider visiting a doctor.

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Anti jokes are funny

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An elderly lady walks into an elevator. She falls over and I kick her in the head.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken probably crossed the road because of some sort of impulse or external stimuli (most likely a bug or a worm located on the other side of the road) in which he or she responded to by proceeding to cross the road in order to get to the other side as chickens have a sense of cause to effect in which the effect would be consuming the bug or other living life form.

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What did Helen Keller say when she fell out of a tree? SHFVDHGCIJCBSHG

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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