What's blue and screams when you look at it Idk that's why I'm asking you

Q: What did the man with no arms and no legs receive for Christmas? A: Cancer

Chuck Norris walks into a bar, the bartender, a known drug smuggler for the Mexican Cartel fires three shotgun rounds. As the bartender reloads Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks first the shotgun out of the man's hands followed by three very quick blows to the head. The bartender goes down unconscious and he is arrested. Though the program is no longer produced, Walker Texas Ranger was a somewhat enjoyable, although poorly written and low budgeted made for television action crime drama series produced from April 21, 1993 to May 19, 2001.

Hitler

Q: What did the guy say to his girlfriend? A: "I like turtles!" Then he smacks her ass.

Q: Why did the cookie go to the dentist? A: Because he was dying of brain cancer.

What's the best thing about sex with 24 year olds? They're in their sexual prime.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

A: make me a sandwich woman! B: your a sandwich.

What do you call a duck with a mustache? A duck with a mustache.

How do you stop a bus? Put the brakes on.

your moms so fat she has a heart attack when she walks to the pantry.

An underaged man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, but the bartender says we don't serve minors. The boy then rushes out if the bar for fear of being caught.

A englishmen an irishmen and a ginger walk off a bridge gingers have no souls

A man walks into kindergarden class with a beer. He then gets arrested.

How do you put an elephant in the refrigerator? Open the door and let him in. How do you put a giraffe in the refrigerator? Open the door and let the elephant out then give the giraffe a reasonable amount of time to enter.

whats blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? With the technology of compact fluorescent light bulbs they don't go out for much longer, so the question is nearly irrelevant.

Connor "Rusty" McLeod

What's the difference between a women's running team and a band of pygmies? Quite a lot.

roses are red facebook is blue you look f**kable so i'll add you by: matt

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

What's wrong with him? He lit the flashlight at both ends.

throbbing slobber

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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