what did the ninja say to the watermelon ? nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the Black Man only eat one apple a day? He was trying to stay healthy. On an unrelated note he was under the poverty line, and addicted to an illegal substance. He does not represent African-American society very well.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you get when you cross Arsene Wenger with Darth Vader? Arsene Vader

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Brittney Spears

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A man walks into a pole and freezes to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q:Where does a woman work at if she has a job? A: IHOP!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the black guy jump into the pool? Because he wanted to go swimming

thumb_up thumb_down +11

whats worse then finding a finger in your soup? - being a cook and losing a finger

thumb_up thumb_down +11

penis

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A black person in the NHL

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Costello: Who's on first Joe Girardi: Mark Teixeira

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What is green but looks like a silver car? A silver car....I lied about the green part.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why is Chuck Norris' beard so great? because he grooms it daily.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Yo Mama is so fat cuz.. She has accumulated Obesity and needs your help to be rehabilitated due to the fact that she is at a high risk of heart attack, cancer, type 2 diabetes, and Etc. Try to motivate her to decrease food intake and increase physical activity. Thankyou

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red Violets are blue I have clamidia Because Polly shat on me.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: why did the plain crash A: because the driver was a loaf of bread

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did a man get arrested in a bar He was covered in bombs and charged with terrorism

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple, your dad having sex with your girlfriend

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what's better than animal crackers? your mom.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some chapstick, put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because as all people know, Ducks cannot speak, however, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need chapstick anyway, since he has no lips.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you not want to get when playing scrabble? Diarrhea

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What happened to the little kid sitting next to a fat kid ? The little kid got DEVOURED

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is x (4 - 10) + 6879 (333) x 678912345 - 9.87537 when x equals pi? Answer: YOUR FACE!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A blonde girl walks into a screen door. She is blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops