What do you get when you cross Arsene Wenger with Darth Vader? Arsene Vader

You better run like your ass is under fire, because it will be if you don't.

the WNBA

what do you call a cucumber that is wearing a dress.... an asian lady

I had a dream I watched Inception.

Why did Jill come "tumbling" down the hill after Jack broke his crown? She fell running on a hill, essentially why Jack broke his crown.

What do you get when you multiply a trillion times a billion times a quintillion? A huge ass number.

What's green, fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree and lands on you, you'd die? A pool table.

whats pink and fluffy? candy floss.

What do you call a group of asians? China.

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

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husband : honey , can i have stuff candy wife : no husband : can i have milk and cookies wife : what kind of milk wink wink husband 2% you pervert

What's brown and sticky? A stick

What do you call a bad joke? Unfunny.

why did the bird fall out of the sky? it had been shot by a bird hunter, as it was bird season.

What do homeless people get for Christmas? Nothing, they are homeless.

whats better than a dead baby..... wait..... whats worse than a dead baby...... never mind its not that funny anymore

Two peanuts were walking down the street and one was asalted

Why did a man get arrested in a bar He was covered in bombs and charged with terrorism

Knock, knock. Who's there? Nick. Nick who? Nick Wyatt

Roses are red Violets are blue I have clamidia Because Polly shat on me.

Why did the indian man take the peanuts out of his lunch? Because he's allergic.

Why did the blonde stare at the carton of orange juice? Because she was lost in her thoughts about her dead husband, and how much he loved orange juice.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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