What do you call an anti joke website? http://anti-joke.com

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How do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the Brake

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Roses are red Violets are blue Get in the car or i'll shoot you

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A fellow walks into a bar very down on himself, so he goes into the bathroom and hang himself from the pipes.

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What's the difference between a porsche and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a porsche in my garage.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? punch her in the dick.

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A: make me a sandwich woman! B: your a sandwich.

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why did the man have solar panels on his house? because he had some money left over cos he won the lottery

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What did one muffin say to the other? I don't know, but you need a psychiatrist.

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What's the difference between Stevie Wonder and Kevin Bacon? There's none. Neither of them is a taxi driver.

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One man said to another 'I think I'm going to have a chinese tonight.' the other replied 'it is wrong to eat people, even if they are chinese.'

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Why did the black guy get arrested? Homicide.

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A plane carries 500 bricks. 1 falls out. How many bricks are left? 499. How do you put an elephant in a fridge in 3 steps? Open the fridge, put in the elephant, and close the fridge. How do you put a deer in a fridge in 4 steps? Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the deer, then close the fridge. The Lion King is having a party. All the animals are there except for one; who is it? The deer: He is still in the fridge. An old lady is crossing a swamp, but it is a crocodile swamp. How does she cross? Normally, all the crocodiles are at the Lion King's party The old lady dies at the edge of the swamp. How? A brick falls from the sky and kills her.

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An underaged man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, but the bartender says we don't serve minors. The boy then rushes out if the bar for fear of being caught.

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whats blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF

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Why are blonds so stupid? Because our society is insecure and we need a common denominator to pick on, so we can feel more comfortable with our mediocre lives.

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Connor "Rusty" McLeod

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Two black people passed me in an alley at night...... They said hi

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When my Xbox died, my girlfriend said: "Finally, you can treat me the same way you treated that thing!" So I tapped her so hard that she died

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What do nine out of ten people enjoy? Gang rape.

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Why was the baseball player arrested after stealing a base? Because he pulled out a knife and stabbed the shortstop in the chest.

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What did the bullied schoolboy do when he got home from school? He cried himself to sleep.

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Q: Why don't blind people skydive? A:Because it is scary

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What's the only part of a vegetable that you can't eat??? His wheelchair

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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