What runs faster than a dead baby? Almost everything.

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nice shorts.

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Three blind mice walk into a bar, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative

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A farmer goes out to the coop to feed the chickens. They're all dead.

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Haha pizza

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What do you call someone who's black? A person you asshole.

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A white guy and a black guy are standing in a room. Which one of them is a murderer? I don't know, there is not enough information given in the question. However, according to Bureau of Justice murder statistics over the last 30 years, the black guy is 7.6 times more likely to be a murderer than a white guy in the United States.

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Man: Drink this. Man 2: Ok. (Drinks it) Man; You drank a powerful substance that is 20000 times stronger than hydrochloric acid! Man2: Oh FUCK! Kelvin Yang.

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What is the first step in making an ugly girl pretty? Shave her genitals.

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One time i ate a sandwich it was good

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So a Jew, a black guy, and a Mexican all walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey guys, what would you like?" They all get beer.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Why couldn't the blonde divide 5 by 0? Because it's impossible to divide by 0.

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Why was the asian so good with computers? Because he spent 8 years in college getting a doctorate in computer programming at the University of Hartford

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Knock Knock? Whos there? akward neighbor. akward neighbor who?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Africa is great, you should get raped

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Your momma's so fat: She has found a value in relationships beyond an aesthetic level.

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What's huge, gray, and has a trunk and wings. An elephant with wings glued to it.

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Okay so two penquins are sitting in a bathtub when one asks the other "Hey pass the soap!". The other one jokingly replies "what do I look like a typewriter?"

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I jizzed in my pants. It tasted good

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A fat man walks into a bar. There is a 70% chance his mom is fat.

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Why did our black president put a porch swing on the white house? He likes to swing.

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Justin Littleton getting laid.

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Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? Everyone on board died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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