KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r Dbags n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

A Man walks into a bar and orders a scotch. His alcoholism is tearing his family apart

Your Momma's so fat when the whales see her they don't say anything as they are unable to speak the human language.

Why'd the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Whose there? A chicken.

Q: What did 0 say to 8. A: Nothing...However multiplied they equal 0

How did the blond's brain cells die? She had a very acute case of Parkinson's disease.

Adam knocks on the door. Eve: who is it? Adam: Don't be silly, just open the f*cking door.

Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? I don't cum on my watermelon before I eat it.

What does Paris Hilton eat on Tuesdays? Nothing.

What does chuck norris do at 4 o clock in the morning ? Sleep

What do you get when you cross an owl with a bunge cord? My ass!

a Mexican and a black guy were sitting in the back of a car, who is driving? -- a cop

How come Jimmy didn't take his math test? Dead babies can't take math tests!

okay.....

Knock, knock. Who's there? Nick. Nick who? Nick Wyatt

Don't you hate it when you're reading a sentence and it doesn't end how you testicles. _._._

Bob (laughing): Jared fell off of a cliff Jim: What's so funny about that? Bob: Nothing. I'm laughing at the girl that just fell out of a tree into a giant tub of peanut butter!!!

What has nine arms and sucks? An appendage-rich octopus with an inhaling habit.

CHEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

"Doctor do i have aids?" asked the worried 13-year old.

What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, dogs can't speak English.

Why do birds suddenly appear? If you were more observant, you would notice they usually approach gradually.

What do you call a man with no eyes or ears? - Deaf and Blind.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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