Roses are green Violets are yellow I have mental problems Doobah haga Blakatrabbit

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What happens when you mix 3 pounds of baking soda, 2 dozen cans of Mr. Pibb cola, and a live tortoise? It makes a terrible mess and your wife gets upset at you for getting the house so dirty. She refuses to clean it up.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Whats the difference between christians and nazis? one suppressed human rights and caused millions of deaths. the others were responsible for the holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Dandelions are yellow, and so are sunflowers.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What runs faster than a dead baby? Almost everything.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

yo mamma so fat she seen a yellow train full of white people and she said stop that twinkie

thumb_up thumb_down +35

this website...

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What is the hardest part of a vegtable? The wheel chair 0.o

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A man walked into a bar and suffered a mild concusion.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you call a boy with no arms and a hunchback? -names

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did the guy say to the mushroom?

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why do women where make-up and perfume? because they are ugly and they smell bad.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

So a Jew, a black guy, and a Mexican all walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey guys, what would you like?" They all get beer.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? *awkward silence* What did the deaf guy say to the mute guy? *Awkward silence....huh?*

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you call a fat Mexican? Whatever his name is.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

i have 2 penises

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q: What do you call a ghost with a broken leg? A: Hoblin Goblin.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A policeman asks a suspect in a murder investigigation about his alibi. The suspect gives him a solid alibi. The suspect go's home to his wife and have dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's yellow and can not swim? A Bulldozer

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Mean while... at Jerry Sandusky's house

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How do you get Pikachu on a bus? You don't, Pikachu is a fictional character therefore doesn't exist

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops