A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released at a nearby park.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

fart

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why do women where make-up and perfume? because they are ugly and they smell bad.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

why did jimmy fall off the swing? because he was a tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A man about to get on a plane forgets to store his utility knife in his bag before the security scan. He is taken to a back room for private questioning and fined.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What happened when the princess kissed the frog? She died, the frog was highly toxic.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's worse than getting raped? Getting raped twice.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Slavery

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

DANA

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a one-armed man Whatever his name is

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Ok, So what happens when an Irishman, Rabbi, and a Black guy all walk into a bar. Nothing the Black guys a recovering alcoholic and is supported by his loving family and friends, especially by his son Martin who he promised to stop drinking when he was 7.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A Starfish walks into a bar. He sits down next to a man with a concussion. Q: What did the man say? A: Nothing because he was in a concussion and was no longer able to say words.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How do I recover from my Pokémon addiction? Catch 'em All!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: Whats worse than having a dead car battery? A: Going to prison and getting raped by a black guy

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why was 6 afraid of 7 Because 7 was black

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken so it will wonder when not properly fenced in

thumb_up thumb_down +13

a women picks up her phone and screams! There were 3 missed calls from her mother-inlaw

thumb_up thumb_down +13

One time I was playing hide and seek with grandma but I couldn't seem to find her. I asked my sister for help and she told me she was hiding in the living room on the shelf. I went into the living room but all I saw was a vase on the shelf. Grandma probably didn't know the game was over so I opened the vase to tell her. To this day she hasn't come out of the vase.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a black person in a pool? A black person swimming.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops