A Muslim, a Jew, a Christian, and an Atheist are eating at the same table. They are friends, and they do this from time to time.

A girl walks into a bar. She's a lesbian.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

a man walks into a bar... and he says 'ouch!'

I JUST HAD SEEX! How blantant, eh?

What do you call a duck with a mustache? A duck with a mustache.

why did the man have solar panels on his house? because he had some money left over cos he won the lottery

Why did the mushroom go to the party??? Cuzz he was a fungi (fun guy)

Why did the women cover up her vaginal area? She was with her friends, queefed, and was extremely self conscious.

wanna hear a joke yo mamma just died

Why did the 1,000 pound woman start crying? Because her son got hit by a car.

Why did the girl not apply for her American CItizenship? She was already an American Citizen.

Roses are white Violets are white I did it in the garden

Your momma's of a reasonable figure and weight.

How do you drown a blonde? From her infancy, instill in her a dread of the water. Keep her away from baths and showers, protect her from pools, and as the child grows, regale her nightly with terrible stories about the cruelty of the sea. When she has matured past 18, take her out to the middle of a lake on a boat and push her in.

How do you put an elephant in the refrigerator? Open the door and let him in. How do you put a giraffe in the refrigerator? Open the door and let the elephant out then give the giraffe a reasonable amount of time to enter.

The racist uncle went to attend his nieces bat-mitzvah. Although he is racist, he is smart enough to not speak his mind, for he is in a temple, and may offend many people at the service.

What's the difference between a women's running team and a band of pygmies? Quite a lot.

^that joke's not funny

When my Xbox died, my girlfriend said: "Finally, you can treat me the same way you treated that thing!" So I tapped her so hard that she died

throbbing slobber

Humpty dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty dumpty had a big fall. All the king's horses and all the king's men did not come to help him because the United States does not have a patriarchal system of government.

Why did the man fall down the steps? I shot him in the face.

Is your refrigerator running? Because your dad just hung himself

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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