What is the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry Potter escapes the chamber.

Whats worse than one pregnancy scare... two pregnancy scares...whats worse than two pregnancy scares? being forced to having consensual sex with a grizzly bear.

Did you see that van with the word "Free Candy" painted on it? I'm also glad to see a successful entrepreneur capable of advertising free wares as an incentive to attract customers in such a recession. It's a great deal for both parties.

How do you put an elephant in the refrigerator? Open the door and let him in. How do you put a giraffe in the refrigerator? Open the door and let the elephant out then give the giraffe a reasonable amount of time to enter.

Two black people passed me in an alley at night...... They said hi

What do you call a black Arnold Schwarzenegger? Arnold Schwarzenegger.

^that joke's not funny

Why did the chicken cross the road Banana

Q: Why don't blind people skydive? A:Because it is scary

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, and have a stimulating discussion about economics

If Vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat? Probably both plant life, sea-based creatures, and land-based animals. However, depending on the personal preference of the person, they can also be a vegetarian or not. They could also be cannibals, but the literal definition of humanitarian would go against any cannibalistic traditions due to the fact that humanitarians help others for the benefit of humanity as a whole, eating people would go against such beliefs.

What did Bobby get for Christmas? Nothing, Bobby is an orphan and has no friends.

Niko isnt a mexican douche

Roses are green Violets are yellow I have mental problems Doobah haga Blakatrabbit

"What starts with F and ends with a K?" "firetruck?" "no, f u c k"

A man and a woman are in bed together and really want to do something, what is that something? Sleep.

Whats the difference between christians and nazis? one suppressed human rights and caused millions of deaths. the others were responsible for the holocaust.

What happens when you mix 3 pounds of baking soda, 2 dozen cans of Mr. Pibb cola, and a live tortoise? It makes a terrible mess and your wife gets upset at you for getting the house so dirty. She refuses to clean it up.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Dandelions are yellow, and so are sunflowers.

Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and smell

What runs faster than a dead baby? Almost everything.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the chicken.

A man walked into a bar and suffered a mild concusion.

What is the hardest part of a vegtable? The wheel chair 0.o

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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