a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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What's worse then having Casey Anthony babysit your child? A girl asking, "Is it in?"

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What's green, fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree and lands on you, you'd die? A pool table.

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what do you call a dog? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

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whats worse then finding a finger in your soup? - being a cook and losing a finger

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What happens if Pinoccio says my nose is about to grow?

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Why do Africans live in slums Because they have aids

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SAY

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a women picks up her phone and screams! There were 3 missed calls from her mother-inlaw

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Knock knock. Use the doorbell, dumbass.

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whats pink and fluffy? candy floss.

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I had a dream I watched Inception.

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How much does a Mexican Parade cost? A Nickel

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What do you call two men having sex with Oprah? Group sex.

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penis

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what did the robot say to the centipede. Stop being a centipede!!!! Its funny because robots have arms.

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Knock-Knock "Who's there?" "It's the police. We have a search warrant."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: I don't know, he didn't tell me.

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What's better than finding a worm in your apple? -The Holocaust

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Knock knock. Who's there? Nobody. Nobody who?

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knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

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i said "what what in the butt, i said what what in the butt?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops