Why did the chicken cross the road Banana

A very depressed man walks into a bar, sits down, and gives the bartender his credit card and says, "Keep giving me beers until I pass out." The bartender asks, "What's wrong Buddy? You can talk to me!" The depressed man explains that he was fired, his wife has been cheating on him for the past 2 years, both his daughters ran away and became prostitutes, his mother died after choking on his father's Genitals and the father had just been diagnosed with both brain and testicular cancer and will die within the week, his sister was kidnapped and sold into a sex slave market and has been missing for the past year, his brother confessed to being gay and committed suicide with his lover (male) after learning that their state did not accept gay marriage. He pauses to drink his beer, then continues on to say that he has been convicted of sexually assaulting a child even though he was innocent, his dog had just been run over by a tractor trailer with no physical body left to bury, his cat had gotten stuck in the garbage disposal and he turned it on without knowledge that the cat was sleeping inside. The man looks at the bartender and started to laugh and cry at his misfortune, he then said,"... And to top it all off i just spent the past 2 hours explaining this to a deaf bartender!" The man then went home and hung himself on the telephone pole outside his house. At the funeral only the bartender,who attended, spoke on his behalf, reciting the man's terrible life, then ending by saying, "This man death has motivated me to search for a cure to this rare Delusional Disorder."

Chocolate tastes good.

a black guy and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? a taxi driver.

why did the mother beat the young boy? Because he was adopted

Q: Why don't blind people skydive? A:Because it is scary

69

What did Bobby get for Christmas? Nothing, Bobby is an orphan and has no friends.

What's the only part of a vegetable that you can't eat??? His wheelchair

STOP LOOKING AT MY JOKE

Roses are green Violets are yellow I have mental problems Doobah haga Blakatrabbit

What type of movies do pirates watch? None they are on a boat!

A man walks into a store, and says to the cashier: "I'd like to buy 6 fridges". The cashier says: "Why do you need that many fridges?" The man says: "I'm an antelope!"

A black policeman and a white policeman work different shifts, one is during the day and one is at night and the both get equal pay.

What do you call a retarded man? Nothing, because it's inappropriate to call retarded people names.

What was the latino gardener doing? Working hard to keep his job in these tough economic times.

What happens when you mix 3 pounds of baking soda, 2 dozen cans of Mr. Pibb cola, and a live tortoise? It makes a terrible mess and your wife gets upset at you for getting the house so dirty. She refuses to clean it up.

A man and a woman are in bed together and really want to do something, what is that something? Sleep.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Dandelions are yellow, and so are sunflowers.

What is the difference between you and Chuck Norris? You're reading this and he's probably doing something productive.

i like potatoes But only mashed baked are a little bad they arent tasty. I like food good because food bad can really hurt me

9/11

Q: How do you fit a giraffe inside a refrigerator? A: You can't, it is physically impossible...

What do you call a black person in 1780? A slave mostly...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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