Why does Michael Jackson like K-mart? He does not; he is dead.

What did the twin towers get at the pizza place? 2 planes

How do you win a war? Drop a fridge on your enemies.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken probably crossed the road because of some sort of impulse or external stimuli (most likely a bug or a worm located on the other side of the road) in which he or she responded to by proceeding to cross the road in order to get to the other side as chickens have a sense of cause to effect in which the effect would be consuming the bug or other living life form.

Knock knock Whos there? D D who D's nuts!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he lost his grip on the branch and was unable to reach another before reaching the ground.

Knock Knock Who's There? Bad-mannered Bad-mannered who? F*ck Off

What did the pig say to the banana? Oink.

A black man walks into a bar. the bartender ask what he wants to drink. the black man responds , "i will have one beer please". so the bartender gives it to him and says have a nice day.

Why did the black man run? There was a mass murderer chasing him with a chainsaw.

A fat man walks into a bar. There is a 70% chance his mom is fat.

How do you get Pikachu on a bus? You don't, Pikachu is a fictional character therefore doesn't exist

What do you call an elderly women who after the death of her late husband had many enconters witb men? A whore.

What did Sally get for Christmas? Nothing, Sally is dead

Whats 2+2=? ?= CHICKEN

how do you reunite the beatles 2 bullets

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Somebody pushed it

How do you make a small fortune? Be financially smart, work hard, save money, all while you make sure you don't let your earnings become a "large" fortune.

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

Penis

Roses are brown Violets are brown everything is brown Who shat in my garden?

whats the difference between santa claus and jewish people santa claus goes down the chimney and jewish people go up

Women's Golf

Why did the hooker go to the bathroom? Because she just exchanged sex for money and was cleaning herself up for her next trick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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