"What starts with F and ends with a K?" "firetruck?" "no, f u c k"

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What's worse than being named Troy Merrill? Being Black.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

why does andy thomson speak that slow because he speaks that way

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and smell

thumb_up thumb_down +39

why are these jokes so funny? why are u so fat bitch

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What did the jew get for christmas nothing because he doesnt celebrate christmas.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What do you call a banana that's about to be eaten? A Banana

thumb_up thumb_down +37

How do you starve colored people? deny them food stamps

thumb_up thumb_down +37

A farmer goes out to the coop to feed the chickens. They're all dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What is the hardest part of a vegtable? The wheel chair 0.o

thumb_up thumb_down +35

There's a American, Mexican, and a Canadian stranded in the desert. They couldn't find any food, water, and shelter. They were all really hungry and thirsty. Later that day the Mexican dies from a very bad infection on his neck.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A black policeman and a white policeman work different shifts, one is during the day and one is at night and the both get equal pay.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch!" Passersby notice the man is blind, which caused him not to notice the bar. He later died in the hospital from severe head trauma

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Q: What did the Miracle Whip say when the refrigerator door was opened? A: Nothing. Miracle Whip cannot speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What do you call someone who's black? A person you asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A man walked into a bar and suffered a mild concusion.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What's the worst thing about being homeless? Not having a home.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why did Ashley run out of juice in her house? Because she drank it all!

thumb_up thumb_down +31

there are two hicks named Billy Bob and Joe. Billy Bob decides to go to college so he goes to sign up for classes. The Dean of the school decides to help him out and tells him he will be taking math, writing, and logic. Billy Bob is okay with the math and writing but then asks "what the hell is logic?" The Dean thinks for a moment and then says "Okay for example, do you have a weedwacker?" Billy Bob says "yeah i got a weed wacker" so then Dean says "So that probably means you have a yard." Billy Bob goes "yeah i got a yard" So the Dean says "so if youve got a yard you've probably got a house." Billy Bob goes "hell ya i got a house!" The Dean says "and if youve got a house that probably means you've got a wife." Billy Bob goes "ya! i got a wife" so the Dean says "If you have a wife then that means you are heterosexual" and Billy Bob goes "of course im heterosexual!" So the Dean goes "See Billy Bob, thats logic." Amazed by this, Billy Bob goes back to Joe and starts to tell him about his classes. He explains he will be taking math, writing and logic. Joe is confused so he asked Billy Bob "what the hell is logic!?" Billy Bob thinks for a moment and goes "okay how can i explain this....okay joe, do you have a weed wacker?" and Joe responds "no Billy Bob i dont got a week wacker..." Billy Bob: "I KNEW YOU WAS A HOMOSEXUAL!"

thumb_up thumb_down +31

AROUND

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A hiker gets lost on a trail and ends up wondering deep into the woods. He comes upon an amish farm. He knocks on the door and an amish man answers. The hiker explains his predicament, and the amish man says "sure you can stay in barn, but promise me one thing, don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course I won't". He then goes to the barn. Right before the hiker falls asleep. The amish farmer comes in and says "make sure you don't have sex with my daughter". The hiker says "of course not". So the next morning the hiker is rested, well fed and is about to leave when the amish man approaches and says, "Thank you being decent and christian like."

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How do you win a war? Drop a fridge on your enemies.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Q: What is worse than loosing your arms? A: Dying

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops