I JUST HAD SEEX! How blantant, eh?

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? I was eating an orange in the park last week when I saw four men brutally murdered before my very eyes.

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Why did lady gaga set her alarm? So she could get up in the morning.

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What happened when the terrorist with a bomb went into a school. He blew up and everyone died.

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your moms so fat she has a heart attack when she walks to the pantry.

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Why did the girl not apply for her American CItizenship? She was already an American Citizen.

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A: Knock knock B: Who is it? A: You'r wife. B: My wife? A: Yes! B: Ok, then i think i pass that question.

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A jew walks into a bar. The bartender says "get out you jew!" The bar tender apparently was a Nazi.

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Daddy daddy daddy. What. Will you buy me a porn for my birthday. What! I want porn daddy. Shut up gosh your a 8 year old girl

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Six hasn't been the same since Vientnamn

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What's the problem with blonde people? They don't have black hair.

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How do you drown a blonde? From her infancy, instill in her a dread of the water. Keep her away from baths and showers, protect her from pools, and as the child grows, regale her nightly with terrible stories about the cruelty of the sea. When she has matured past 18, take her out to the middle of a lake on a boat and push her in.

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A black man is playing guitar for a white man and a chinese man. After he is finished playing the white man and chinese man compliment him on his nice playing.

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Q .What robin told to batman before they got into the car? A. Get into the car!!

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Two muffings are in an oven. One leans towards the other due to rising of the batter and says nothing. The other cupcake, unable to yield the cognitive process to speak utters nothing and cooks to an internal temperature of 175 C.

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what did the catholic priest say to the little boy? -probably something about god or jesus because they are in church

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Two muffins are in an oven. Although they both possess the extraordinary ability to speak, strangely each remains silent, apparently lost in their own thoughts. Thus nobody has any reason to think they are any different than any other muffins. Later after they've been baked and allowed to cool, they are sold to a woman who eats them along with a small salad. She enjoys their chewy, hearty texture, and lightly sweet taste. She is completely unaware of what amazing discovery has just been lost to science.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean? Dead.

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What's more boring than watch grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, and have a stimulating discussion about economics

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? it was dead.

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What rhymes with sloth? Cloth

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What do you call a retarded man? Nothing, because it's inappropriate to call retarded people names.

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What do you call a monkey? A monkey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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