Two oranges walking down the street, one says to the other, "Where do you live?". The other replies "I'm not telling you, you'll steel my washing"

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What do you find....... there's a..........

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What do you call a young fortune teller who just escaped from jail? A small medium at large.

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Why couldn't Jimmy ride his bike? His family had to sell it in order to put food on the table

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A Ferrari Enzo and a Toyota Prius were having a street race. The Driver of the Ferrari died after he was hit by a bus.

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a guy is driving home his wife calls him and she say's be careful there is a lunatic driving on the wrong side of the road towards traffic he then reply saying they all are

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There was an old woman who lived in a shoe. She had so many children her uterus fell out.

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Six hasn't been the same since Vientnamn

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Whats worse than one pregnancy scare... two pregnancy scares...whats worse than two pregnancy scares? being forced to having consensual sex with a grizzly bear.

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A man buys free health care...

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Did you see that van with the word "Free Candy" painted on it? I'm also glad to see a successful entrepreneur capable of advertising free wares as an incentive to attract customers in such a recession. It's a great deal for both parties.

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Two muffings are in an oven. One leans towards the other due to rising of the batter and says nothing. The other cupcake, unable to yield the cognitive process to speak utters nothing and cooks to an internal temperature of 175 C.

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What happened to the chicken who crossed the road ? Quite obviously he got to the other side to be greeted by a 50 foot half man half chicken who had one leg.

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So I walked upstairs and I told the guy, "No." And he then asks, "Why?"

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Why did the insect play marco polo? It couldn't. Marco polo requires multiple players.

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A man walked into the white house and security escorted him out because he didn't have a pass.

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Chocolate tastes good.

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if you are what you eat then arent pornstars considered vaginas?

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What did the cowboy say to the alien? Nothing, this is a dream. Wake up.

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your mamas so fat she falls out f both sides of the bed

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

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What do you call Morgan Freeman on a bad day? Samuel L. Jackson.

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What do you call a cow with big horns? A bull.

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whats slower then a turtle A FATTY

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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