What's long, hard and full of seamen? A submarine.

What happened when the terrorist with a bomb went into a school. He blew up and everyone died.

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? I was eating an orange in the park last week when I saw four men brutally murdered before my very eyes.

wanna hear a joke yo mamma just died

Daddy daddy daddy. What. Will you buy me a porn for my birthday. What! I want porn daddy. Shut up gosh your a 8 year old girl

What is bad about being black and Jewish? Your gonna have to sit in the back of the oven

Q. why didnt the boy get a christmas present from his dear grandmother? A. because she died on thanksgiving

How do you drown a blonde? From her infancy, instill in her a dread of the water. Keep her away from baths and showers, protect her from pools, and as the child grows, regale her nightly with terrible stories about the cruelty of the sea. When she has matured past 18, take her out to the middle of a lake on a boat and push her in.

Why couldn't the woman go grocery shopping? She was paralyzed from the neck down.

What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing, rocks are inanimate objects, therefore rendering them unable to participate in the activity of speech.

You know how we have iPods? OJ Simpson strangled his wife.

your mamas so fat she falls out f both sides of the bed

Chocolate tastes good.

why can't the black man get a job? The economy is suffering and unemployment rates are at an all time high

Whats the difference between your mother and a mallard with a cold? There are far to many differences between humans and birds to consider for this question. A small list might include wings, feathers, and mating habits to name a few.

What did the little boy find when he came home from school? His mother hanging from a tree.

Why is one side of a geese formation heading south always longer than the other? It has more geese

Why did the man fall over screaming? Because he got shot in the leg

What runs faster than a dead baby? Almost everything.

Why does my girlfriend pee standing up? Because he is a man.

What type of movies do pirates watch? None they are on a boat!

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Shes dead.

Hey! did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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