Yo momma is so dumb she... oh god, i'm so sorry, she was driving and she just looked down at her cellphone and there was a red light and all the cars were coming she didn't even stop oh god i'm so sorry.

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A priest, a rabbi and a shaman walk into a bar. Except there is no rabbi and there is no shaman and the bar is actually my 8th birthday party priest is molesting me. And the priest is my dad. My dad molested me. A lot...

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if it's friday, it must be China

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yesterday i saw a man walking down the street with no legs. just kidding.

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Why did Jim laugh so hard? Triangle!

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What's big, black, wide, long, and has white lines all over it? A new highway road.

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Why couldn't the girl charge her phone? The charger wasn't plugged in.

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BILLY BOB JAM:KNOCK KNOCK!! BOBERT:WHAT!! BILLY BOB JAM:PIE BOBERT:WHY WOULD I EVEN CARE?!! BILLY BOB JAM:PIE BOBERT:WHY WONT YOU SHUT UP BILLY BOB JAM ORLANDIO STEAK?!!?!?!GET ME OUTTA HERE AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

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why are their no mexicans in hell they all jumped the border

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A girl walks into a bar. She's a lesbian.

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Why was Brother Jim so loyal to god? Because he had a harpoon through his anal cavity.

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What's the best thing about sex with 24 year olds? They're in their sexual prime.

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What’s the best part about winning a gold medal? Nothing. You’re on acid and staring straight at the sun.

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Whats the difference between a black guy and a retard? NOTHING!!!!!!

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if you are what you eat then arent pornstars considered vaginas?

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Knock Knock Whos there? smell map smell map who?...really? I was in the middle of a phone call with my paraplegic wife's doctor, who was telling me that her condition has gotten worse and doesn't think she'll make it to the end of the month. You interrupted that in order to get me to say something that sounded like "smell my poo". Forget being allowed into my house, you should be worried about being allowed into heaven. Hopefully as you walk home today, someone will murder you.

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What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing, rocks are inanimate objects, therefore rendering them unable to participate in the activity of speech.

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What do you call Morgan Freeman on a bad day? Samuel L. Jackson.

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Your mom is so fat, her pants are starting to get tight.

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Why was the blond looking at the orange juice box? Because she was reading the nutritional content of orange juice.

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A purple kangaroo hops into a bar. There is no such thing as a purple kangaroo. The end.

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What do you call a cow with big horns? A bull.

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Hey! did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she...

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Want to hear a joke? Jerry Sandusky's innocence

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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