Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot turned into a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

I jizzed in my pants. It tasted good

thumb_up thumb_down +24

how do you reunite the beatles 2 bullets

thumb_up thumb_down +24

your amazing just the way you are... even though you have aids.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Perpresher

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you do when you see a black man? The same thing you do when you see anybody.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How did the jew reply to the racist comment? Judaism is not a race, it's a religion.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Ok, So what happens when an Irishman, Rabbi, and a Black guy all walk into a bar. Nothing the Black guys a recovering alcoholic and is supported by his loving family and friends, especially by his son Martin who he promised to stop drinking when he was 7.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Women's Golf

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting attacked by an evil demonic llama.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why are Jews so tight with there money? They want to be finanically stable and provide a future for their familys.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A man walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Tulips are red, And my garden is red. OMG...MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What does a ghost get when he watches pornography? A boner

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

I don't hate you because you're fat. You're fat because I hate you

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: Why happened to the dead whale? A: It was shot by Asian pochures.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's harder than nailing seven dead babies to a tree? My erection while doing it.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what did the hungry Ukrainian man say to his mother? "? ????? ???????? ?????????? ? ????. ?? ? ??????? ? ??????"

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the boy say after he hit his head? I just hit my head.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call a black man who flies planes? A pilot, what do you call him you freaking racist!?!?!?!?!?

thumb_up thumb_down +16

1 + 1 = 11 Just kidding, it's 2 you moron.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Doctor, Doctor I keep getting pains in the eye when I drink coffee! It's not the coffee, you have a deadly case of ocular melanoma, a form of cancer that affects the eye. You'll be blind within the next 24 hours.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops