Roses are brown Violets are brown everything is brown Who shat in my garden?

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

My friend said that onions are the only food that could make you cry. That was before I hit him with a watermelon.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting attacked by an evil demonic llama.

Whats the definition of helpless? A quadraplegic in a washing machine

What do you call 400 black men rolling down a hill? 400 black men rolling down a hill.

9/11/01 walks into a bar

How do you have safe sex? Cut your own balls off

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

What is brown and sticky? A stick.

What happens if Pinoccio says my nose is about to grow?

A Man walks into a bar and orders a scotch. His alcoholism is tearing his family apart

I walked into a dark ally at night and ran into 2 black men They severely beat me then while unconscious brutally raped me. I then spent 5 weeks in the hospital in a deep coma.

Roses are red, stones are gray, this poem is obvious, YOU DONT SAY??

What did the boy get from Penn State University? A College Degree

I had a dream I watched Inception.

Q. How do you make a blonde sad? A. Tell her that her entire family died in an accident.

What do you call a jew in a room full of gold? I highly improbable scenario in which the circumstances of how this "man" seemingly got into a gold room are unexplained.

Q: Why is winter the best season? A: It eliminates the homeless.

What is green but looks like a silver car? A silver car....I lied about the green part.

What was the hardest part about the orphanage burning down? My cock.

FOLLOW ME @airvvv

How much does a Mexican Parade cost? A Nickel

here i am sitting here staring at the wall and beside me is a doll, oh no its moving, i hope it doesnt lick tht popsicle, oh no it just licked tht popsicle, oh no oh no

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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