if life gives u lemons....chuck them back and say u wanted muffins instead!!!!!!!!!!!

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Chocolate Bananas with Brocclie.wom

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Jim and Larry work together. Jim works hard, and Larry is a bit of a prankster. One day, Jim is having a rather rough day, and Larry looks to cheer him up with a good-natured joke. Knowing that Jim's wife prepares dinner for him every night of the week, he calls her and tells her that their boss has decided to pay for a dinner out, that she should take the day off and just get ready for Jim to come home and pick her up. Larry will later follow up by calling a pizza delivery place and having them send a special no hard feeling message with two large delicious pizzas. He forgets to call the pizza delivery man until later that night, after which it's too late and he thinks "I'll just explain the joke to Jim tomorrow." And goes peacefully to sleep. Arriving home and finding that dinner is not prepared, Jim savagely beats his wife.

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why are these jokes so funny? why are u so fat bitch

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A horse walks into a bar and the bar tender says, "Why the long face?" and the horse says, "I have cancer."

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How do you get Pikachu on a bus? You don't, Pikachu is a fictional character therefore doesn't exist

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Who is Red and White and comes on Christmas? A Russian Candy Cane

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What's worse than forgetting a punchline?

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How do you stop someone from dying of cancer? Shoot them in the head.

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Why do Jewish people where hats in church? They feel there head will often get cold

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What do you call someone who can't move their arms or their legs A quadriplegic

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What will happen when a black person die they die

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Why did the mexican cross the road....... To find work so he can support his starving family

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What's the difference between ignorance and apathy? Most people are ignorant of the global sex slave trafficking industry and apathetic about global hunger.

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What happened when the princess kissed the frog? She died, the frog was highly toxic.

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Hey Jim? What? Pass the stapler.

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What's worse than being a replacement? An insufficient replacement.

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How do I recover from my Pokémon addiction? Catch 'em All!

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Pandas Everywhere!!!

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Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it got hit by a bus.

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9:11 make a wish

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what do you call a dog? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

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A fat man buys a salad

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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