Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he got shot in the face. Why couldn't the boy get back on the swing? He had no arms. Why didnt his mum come and save him? She is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair.

What is an Indian's favourite country? North Currya

Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

A horse walks into a bar. The barman asks "Why the long face?" The horse takes offense and replies "I was born like this."

Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

Q: what did the dog say to the cat? A: nothing dogs can't talk

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What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

Where is Jew University? Berlin, Germany

A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

What do you call someone who can legally murder? OJ Simpson

How did the Muslim pilot die? He had a fatal heart attack while flying over the Atlantic and as a result the 300 passengers died by drowning.

Person 1. Knock-knock. Person 2. Who's there? Person 1. The doctor. Person 2. The doct-- Person 1. You have cancer and have about three weeks to live.

69.

What's Rupert bear's middle name? the

What do you get when you cross a lion and a tiger? A Ligor.

What do you call a black priest? Holy shit.

What's worst than finding a worm in your apple Finding half a worm in your apple .....

Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

Q. why did the black man cross the road? A. Cause there is no law saying he cant

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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