Last year my wife ran away with my best friend. I really miss him.

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Me Me, who? -You -You? but I thought you were me. - I am you, you're looking in the mirror, asshole. - No, sir i'm sorry you have the wrong house. Asshole doesn't live here.

What do you get when you cross a RPG with a cell phone? A microwave

Whats worse than a worm in your apple? A worm in your asshole.

How do you make spongebob come to Life? You kiss him????????

whats worse than a paper cut? getting your head chopped off

My Penis is so big. How big is it? If you lay my penis down beside another similarly lengthy object, approximately 10" long, it would most likely surpass the length of the object you chose to measure it to.

A man walks into a bar. Another man becomes the Limbo State Champion.

Ya Mums so fat when she stood on the scales it came up with my phone number

Pretend you are in a box and there is no way out. How do you get out? You don't

NO ONE LIKES RANGAS

a man dyslexic into bar walks a

Your Mama is so old, that she is probrably going to die pretty soon.

Why was the blonde confused? Because someone was dressed in a chicken costume throwing pinecones at her.

Blonde: what does IDK stand for? Brunett: i don't know Blonde: NOBODY KNOWS!!!

Q: Why did the boy have a bloody nose? A: Because a serial killer split his head in half with an axe.

What's good about sex with twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

my brother yells at me for singing in the shower so i scream "how can you hate from outside the tub when you cant even get in?"

What do Lebron James and Bill Murray have in common? They are both black basketball players. Except for bill murray

A man has a parrot who repeats everything the man says. He constantly complains about his mother-in-law and everytime he says her name it follows with the word bitch. One day she makes a suprise visit and he greets her with a "Oh hello Doris" , he looks in horror to see if the parrot will call her a bitch but instead finds the parrot dead because he forgot to feed it for 4 days.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Yo momma so hairy she needs to shave herself.

What does a black guy get for Christmas? Everything you own

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...