Why did Susie drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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Q: What did the chicken cross the road? A: "Why did the chicken cross the road?" is a common riddle or joke in several languages. The answer or punchline is: "To get to the other side." The riddle is an example of anti-humor, in that the curious setup of the joke leads the listener to expect a traditional punchline, but they are instead given a simple statement of fact. "Why did the chicken cross the road?" has become largely iconic as an exemplary generic joke to which most people know the answer, and has been repeated and changed numerous times.

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rozes r read violots r bue i cannt soell causse ima bliend

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What's a pirate's favorite video game? Pirates lived in a time before such technology existed

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How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? He's dead.

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What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

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Why did the communist fail his history class? Because he didn't study hard enough.

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WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

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Q: what did the emo girl use to check her email? A: A computer.

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Q: How many times did the chicken cross the road? A: One and a half.

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Why didn't Sammy Robertson make the world series catch to win the series in 1977? Because Sam, like many many discouraged teens in America, didn't follow his life long dream and later became a janitor at his hometown middle-school.

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What did the homeless man find on the side of the street? A pile of dead babies.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? - AIDS. What's worse than AIDS? - Getting AIDS and stubbing your toe.

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Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

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A man drinks a java while using Java His java was hot, making him spill on his laptop Blue screen of death

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What happened to the boy that got raped? He later died of depression

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Q:what do you get when you get when you cross a dog and a human A: a human-dog hybrid with AIDS

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Why are orphans so bad at baseball? They don't know where home is.

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Q: How many dead babies does it take to fill a mixing bowl? A: There is an infinite amount of answers to this question depending on the sizes and shapes or the dead babies, so lets assume that an average would probably be about 4 babies that dies just as the left the mother.

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Q: a man in a camry runs over his wife. who's fault is it? A: toyota and their breaks.

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Why couldn't the married couple have sex? They were lesbians who were saving up a sex change.

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Knock knock It's open, come in

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What did the little girl say to her mother? Nothing, the previous day the little girl was kidnapped and rapped by two 40 year old men and was eventually decapitated...she will never speak to her mother again.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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