What do you call an giraffe? Well, you should probably call it a giraffe if you want people to think you are literate and know your grammar.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie-pop? zero if you bite it

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What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car because he was depressed and contemplating suicide.

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what did the girl say after her boyfriend proposed? she said no because they've still got a lot of stuff to deal with before they even consider getting married and he seriously needs to get a job and dump his other girlfriend.

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Roses are red and so is venus now kneel down and suck my penis:)

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What do you call a dog that acts like a cat, likes to pretend he's human, and whose name is "Moose"? A dog. His personality traits have no effect on the changing of his species.

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Lol Nerochan, that was like totally awesome!

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What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

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Why was the iPhone screen cracked? Because it was dropped on a rock.

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A deranged serial killer walks into a bar. No one leaves because he looks like a normal guy.

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A blonde girl gets in a bad car accident . A man stops on the side of the road to help her . She is panicking The man gets out a piece of chalk and draw a small circle. He says "Do not step out of this circle" The man smashes her car with a baseball bat She giggles He rolls her car down the hill, She laughs Her car is on fire , She is cracking up He yells " WHAT IS SO FUNNY " She says , "I stepped out of the circle three times when you weren't looking"

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Hitler, a Nazi, and a Jew walk into a bar. Only Hitler and the Nazi walk out. What happened to the Jew? He had to use the bathroom so he asked Hitler and his Nazi friend to wait in the car.

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kcid gib a evah uoy neht sdrawkcab siht daer nac uoy fi

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Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

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Where did the boy go after the explosion? Everywhere

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do you know who loves getting fisted? sock puppets

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what happens when an Asian and a Jew get married. They have children.

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You read this in school as the kid sitting next to you stares at his computer screen.

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Why did the President fall down? He was assassinated. -mattobrado

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She's a woman

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Why did the chicken itch it's bum? Cause it's bum was itchy

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How do you tell the difference between Lila and derrek ashmore? Oh wait they both have vaginas

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops