Why was the man's foot hurting? Because he was being fed into a wood chipper

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Whats the difference........ Between a duck?

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H2O corndogs running around naked CC

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Have you heard the one about Tony Hawk's brother Mike? Neither has he, considering Tony Hawk only has a brother named Steve.

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Out of Jill, Jason, Jesse, Jane and Harold, which one is the odd one out? Jason, because he only has one arm.

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What do you call a black guy who wins a race? A winner

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a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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What did the mother of the boy with cancer say on his birthday? - Happy Birthday, too bad you still have cancer.

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Q: Why was the old man sad? A: Because he has a quarter super glued to the bottom of his foot

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Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit! I can talk too!"

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What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

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Knock knock who's there atch watch who? bless you

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is hard to know things like that.

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Q: what do you call a deer with no eyes A; roadkill

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Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

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Když si to Nikolas ,dejme tomu že Bihary, you know nuseng.. hahahahaha

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whats worse than 2 jews 3 jews

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regoereiorgiorehgijreirehrfjirgjirejgruirehgrghehiiehaoiwpo;lkswpokewqoifgoieqjgiubtfoewfiir K.O

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What do you call an blonde, brunette, and a redhead? There has yet to be a definition for a group of people categorized by hair color.

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I walked into a Mcdonald's and ordered a Big Mac. I regretted it later.

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When Chuck Norris plays Modern Warfare 2, he gets more care packages than Haiti did.

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A man works at a Doritos factory hes worked there for a few weeks and hes made the most Doritos in his line now and the head of the company gives him a promotion he now runs his own line a few months later the head of the company bob comes back to him and promoted him again to now our friend Carl is head of the Factory about two years later bob comes to Carl and hes promoted to head of the east coast he is head of 27 Factories about a decade later bob asks Carl if when he retires Carl will take over the company and he accepts bobs offer 23 years pass and bob retires Carl is the new head of the company so he is about like 65 at this point and he wants some wine so him and his buddies go for some wine Dan says Carl this lines two long so they decide to have some soda and then Jason says this lines longer then the last one so Aiden says to Carl why don't we go get some punch so they all got into line but there was no punch line a.w. j.p.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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