why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to prove he wasn't chicken

A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer walk into a bar. They order some drinks, sit quietly and stare at their shoes until they've finished their drinks, then go back home and wallow in loneliness, wishing their social skills weren't so abysmal.

why did you read this anti-joke? because you typed in antijoke on google or have the app on a phone

roses are red violets are blue get out of my face before i kill you

What do u call 30000 Mexicans rolling Dow a hill. Hahaha your mom

A Johnson walks into a hole. Why am I in this hole? Because rape is not an option.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Ya. Ya Who? Dot Com.

God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

What do you call a spoiled black daughter? Tiana (Disney Princess)

Actually it was me Josh brown

Knock knock. Who's there? Schizophrenia.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My farts stink, And so do you.

My friend, who has struggled with a lifelong battle against anorexia, died yesterday..." "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" "Yeah, me too. The car ran the stoplight and it was all over...

How many times have I said the word shingles? twelve.

Billy and Joseph are playing Rock paper scissors. Billy says paper. Joseph proceeds to throw a rock as hard as he can at Billys face and sends him to the emergency room where he was later diagnosed with terminal testicular cancer.

You know what's good for shoulder pain? If you ice on for 20 minutes then off for 20 minutes repetitively three times a day

roses are red, violets are blue with a face like yours, you belong in a zoo but don't worry, cos I'll be there too not in the cage but laughing at you!

why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

What do you call a woman with one leg? I don't know. I am not in the position, currently, of knowing anyone who finds themselves in such an unfortunate condition.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Now that we got our colors straight. Hey, how ya doin?

What's the difference between acne and Michael Jackson? One is a an unsightly blemish that appears on your skin and the other is a dead pop singer.

How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

How do you call the uncle who molested you as a child? More than likely with a telephone.

What do you call a chicken with no head? A chicken with no head.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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