A man asks a young boy to get in his van. The kid, being very well-educated tells the man he cannot talk to strangers. So, the man tells the kid he understands, and drives away to another nearby child.

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Guess what? I like trains.

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What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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why did the man sell the car and bought worse one? it' s his hoby to restore cars

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Why did Hitler kill himself? He realized what he'd gotten himself into and became severely depressed

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Q Why did the chicken cross the road? A Because it couldn't fly

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

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What do you do if life gives you lemons? Whoa... where did these lemons come from?

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Jerry: Why arent you talking to me Seth? Seth then explains using sign language that he was born mute and is offended that Jerry keeps forgetting. Then Jerry uses sign language to say" **** off i have alzheimers!"

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How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

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What do you call a rapist who uses condoms and excessive lubricant? A Rapist.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

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Roses are red And heres something new Violets are violet They're not friggin blue

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Q: How do you kill a Brazilian Blind Electric Ray? A: Killing endangered species is a crime.

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

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Why did the girl make a sandwich for her boyfriend? Because she offered to make lunch in order to save money by not going to a restaurant.

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What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

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why couldnt the jew play basketball? He was handicapp

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What's grammatically incorrect about this sentence? Nothing. I lied.

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Why is the dog in the driver seat? Why is there birds making you filet mignon? Why is your toe blue? I don't know the answer. Go talk to your doctor

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What's a pirate's favorite video game? Pirates lived in a time before such technology existed

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Scott Scott who? Scott Henderson. Oh my god Scotty! I haven't seen you since highschool, please come in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops