Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because he felt crummy.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

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What did the monkey say to the newlywed couple? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

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ah-ah. the proper response to an anti joke.

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So mind telling me why you wont call me? And why, you know... Are you avoiding this condition of yours?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Koolaid is red, Poweraid is blue, Gatorade is yellow, My urine is brown... looks like i have a bladder infection.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

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What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

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what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

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Q:Why was 6 afraid of seven? A:Because seven ate (eight) nine

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A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

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why did the black man shoot himself? because he commited a crime and was sorry for what he had done

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Gerald: Hey did you know I was named AFTER Abraham Lincoln? Gloria: Because he was born in the 1800's and you were born and named many years afterward? Gerald: Ah... I guess I emphasized that joke a little to much - I'm sorry this conversation happened

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Knock, Knock... Whose there? panther panther who? panth-er no panths im goin' swimmin'

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An African-American is like a hammer. It can't be trusted in the hands of women.

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What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

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What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

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Knock Knock? Come in.

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Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting mauled by a pack of hungry wolves

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Why did the chicken cross the road. To get to the other side. Original anti joke.

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Q: Whats better than not being a Jew? A: Being a Jew.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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