- Anti Joke

A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

Q. What did the chicken say to the buffalo? A. Nothing, this is an improbable predicament.

How do you confuse an English Professor? Light your pants on fire and flop around like a fish.

Dude, you were so drunk last night that you got in a terrible car accident, and now you are paralyzed from the waste down for life.

Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

a man dyslexic into bar walks a

So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down, and orders a drink. After giving the pirate a drink, the bartender looks down and notices that there is a steering wheel on the pirate's penis. "Sir, are you aware that there is a steering wheel on your penis?" The bartender asked. "Arrrrrrr, it's driving me crazy!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon," said the bartender, "It looks very uncomfortable and could be dangerous to your health...not to mention your penis is out in the open." "Yes, you are probably right," the pirate agreed. He proceeded to get a ride from a friend to the nearest hospital, for drinking and driving can be dangerous, and steering wheels on penises are not safe.

Why are Asians yellow? Because that is their natural skin color

What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

What did the terrorist do to the small village? Destroy it with a bomb vest.

Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. They order a few drinks, chat, and walk out.

Three men were on a plane. Oh wait. You probably already heard this one.

You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

Out of Jill, Jason, Jesse, Jane and Harold, which one is the odd one out? Jason, because he only has one arm.

I was about to do an triathlon, but i took an arrow to the knee. It got infected and i promptly died two days later.

What scares little children and befriends their parents? A clown

who would win in a gang battle? WEST COAST SWAG

A man walks into a bar, buys a pint of beer, talks to his friends for while and leaves.

A priest sneeks in to a pre-school and is arrested shortly after for tresspassing.

What did peter griffin say to the black guy? Oh you are black.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the tiger.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops