What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? They both can't ride a bike

What do you call a group of white males wearing hoods and setting fires? Cold

Why did the chicken cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

what's a snake that has no legs a snake

What is wet, white and sticky? Glue, of course.

Why did the man cross the street? Because he had to go work.

Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

What did the hooker say to the black guy? How long do you want it for?

womens rights.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, a car ran him over.

Why did Suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

Q. Why did the boy fall off the swing? A. He had no arms or legs. Q. What did he get for Christmas? A. A drumset Q. Knock Knock Who's there Not him

what did the woman say? 'duhhh, i don't have a penis durr durr' (By the way, I'm trying to be not misogynistic, please let me know if you find this misogynistic in any way)

A squirrel asks an apple where is the nearest gas station. The apple doesn't reply.

Q. What do humans and jelly beans have in common ? A. Nothing.

Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

A black person goes up to the drive through at popeye's, what did they say? Nothing, it was closed.

Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are potentially dangerous weapons that may inflict bodily harm.

What do dragonflies do when they are a couple? One sits on the others head, causing the bottom dragonfly to have a loss of vision, and increases the weight on the bottom dragonfly, which increases the chance of both the dragonflies deaths.

What is the difference between a Mexican and an a pile of crap? One is disgusting and unsanitary and the other is a pile of crap.

A little girl was curious about where people come from so she asked a very controversial question. Girl goes up to her mother and ask "Mommy, where do babies come from?" Mother replies "Ask daddy." Girl says "Daddy, where do babies come from?" Father replies "Ask the dog." Girl then goes up to her dog and says "Doggy, where do babies come from?" The dog doesn't reply because it's a dog.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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