A: How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Q: None! They shouldn't have to...

The police shouldn't have cars. They should use skateboards and use flowers as their gun. When they catch a criminal in the act, they have to hug him before sending him to prison

Roses are red Violes are blue I am hot How bout you?

why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

What Did Gretel say to Hansel? Stop having sex with Ariana Grande!

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Why did the dead baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

My father stole my mothers heart, he's in jail for murder

The funniest thing happened in my dream last night, i dreamed that banks would stop ripping people off and start treating people like humans. How wierd is that :D

what do eagles and moles have in common? they both live underground except for the eagle!

What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

How old are you? 7

Why did the chicken cross the road To walk back

A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

i quit soccer because science happened and then i forgot how to screw in a lightbulb

What do you call a black person that plays golf? Jack, his name is Jack.

How many blond girls does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, it is a faily simple task

mary poppins' handbag is full of fuckin dick

THER ONCE WAS A jueny WITH A TEN FOOT WENNY AND HE WENT TO SHOW IT TO THE LADY NEXT DOOR SHE THOUGHT IT WAS A SNKE SO SHE HIT IT WITH A RAKE AND NOW ITS ONLY FIVE FOOT FOUR!

What did modern scientists say to Einstein? Neurtinos travel faster than the speed of light! :)

What is black and hangs on a rope next to a rebel flag in my back yard? A tire swing for my redneck kids to swing on.

Why did the grandma stop baking cookies? Because she is an aging widow suffering from depression because her family seems to forget her existance as she barely lives day by day wilting in her 1 bedroom home.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The farmer decided it was too cruel to fence in the animal, however getting run over by a car was a fate... not worse than death because it died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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