A clown walks into a bar and orders a pie. After about 2 minutes, the bartender gives him a pie. Later, a blonde walks into a bar and orders a cake. After about 1 minute, the bartender gives her a cake. Then a dog walks into a bar. It doesn't order anything because it's a dog.

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Well, it all depends on the size of the bathtub.

So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

What's worse than finding half a suicide tablet in your apple? Finding half a worm.

How old am I? If you guessed correctly, you are psychic. If you guessed incorrectly, I will send flying gnomes to capture and torture you. Unless, of course, you are of a racial minority in which case nothing will happen to you because I am not racist. :P

A man is at the doctor's waiting to be examined. The doctor walks into the room and takes one look at the man. The Doctor says, "You will need to stop masturbating." The man looks at him and says, "What, why?" The doctor says, "so that I can examine you"

A teacher, a lawyer, and a doctor are all at the edge of the cliff. Then they jump off and die.

2 black guys, a colombian guy and a white girl are sitting at a bar. They are friends.

Q: Why did the black man shit himself? A: He experienced post-mortem bowel release after he was murdered due to his racial identification.

why did the baby fall down the steps? Because there was big earth quake that blocked his parents on the other side of the house, therefor leaving no one capable of getting to him befor falling

I accidentally solicited a prostitute today. I was driving in an iffy neighborhood and saw a woman on the sidewalk, so I stopped to ask if she could give me directions. She must have misheard me.

how many flys in a box six --sticksack

Why was the fat man crying? He was sentenced to the electric chair for a murder he didn't commit.

What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

What did 4 Year Old Jonny get for his birthday? Death.

What do you call a black man with a gun a soldier who is fighting for his country

Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

antonio has a penis head.lol

(Something terribly disturbing that people find funny)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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