Why did the man steal the little girl? He didn't. She was his daughter and they were driving home after picking up the groceries.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why was the cat meowing really loud? It was on fire. Why did the cat suddenly stop meowing? It died.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red, Violets are red, I stabbed someone in my garden, There's blood everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the amputee get for chritmas? A bicycle

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A Black man, a Latino, and a Midget get into a car. They drive to the county fair, get snow cones and ride the tilt-a-whirl.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How is an elephant like a grape? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the boy fall off the sky scraper. It was hit by an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No one, because a hollowed out pineapple carcass would not be able to last longer than a month in that high concentration of sodium.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a larger worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

whats worse than having ice cream and not eating it? Being lactose intolerant

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The police catch them, and they are sentenced to jail.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the black man steal an inhaler? Because he was broke and he had asthma.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to why did the bubble gum cross the road? it was on the chickens foot

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you do if you see a Mexican riding a bike? Say "Hello." It is polite.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What is annoying and uses another language? Spanish class!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Yo mama so stupid, she scored poorly on her SAT exams in high school. She was unable to recieve a college education. She now works as a full time waitress at a small diner. She earns minimum wage and is still getting nowhere on her search for a better job.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

In an effort to bond, the American president and North Korean Supreme Leader place a bet on a football game. If the President was correct, the Supreme Leader would have to buy them a drink, and vice versa. The game is close but in the end the President's bet wins. He asks for the drink, but the Supreme Leader refuses. An argument breaks out, and lasts for several hours. Eventually the Supreme Leader becomes too infuriated, and leaves. So the next day, North Korea declares war on America and launches nuclear missiles towards them, millions of lives are lost, and the world descends into anarchy.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupter. Interrupter who? Interrupter Jones.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Yo momma so fat that she was diagnosed with obesity and may need medical assistance in the future and will be reliant on you, her child.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops