What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Q: A man walked into a bar and said, "Ouch!" Why? A: The man walked into a METAL bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What did one sexy babe say to the other? We are sexy

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What's worse than failing a school test for Peter? Nothing, because he is asian.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

A black man walks into a store with a gun. It is a gun store and he needs to buy amunition after using all of his to fend of a home invader, and protect his family. He lives in a bad area because he never went to college and cannot get a well paying job in this economy, so he can't afford to buy a house in a better area He then used the gun to rob a bank. He no longer lives in a poor area

thumb_up thumb_down -48

How do you know when a blonde has been using your computer? If you're lucky some of his or hair will have fallen out and be left on the keyboard as evidence.

thumb_up thumb_down -64

What's just not right? Left

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why did John get hard? He froze to death

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Where would canada be without nature? still here

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Knock knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave was beginning to get very scared of his best friend at this time, so he ran away panicking.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did the fat kid eat for dinner? Salad, he's on a diet.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why can't Michel Jackson play chess? He's dead

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

roses are red, violets are purple, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down +21

a black guy a mexican guy and a puerto rican guy are driving together in a car whos driving? Whoevers car it is.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A black man goes outside to shoot some hoops. He misses all of them because not all blacks are good at basketball.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the all black baseball team beat the all white baseball team? Because the black team scored more runs than the white team.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, If you do find one, what`s your plan?

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Whats black and blue and red all over? An infant after its been beaten with a bat.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops