Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

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Why do Jews have such big noses? They don't; To suggest phenotypic variation along religious lines is preposterous.

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How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

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whats the stage after cancer? you die

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on a scale from voldemort to nigel thornberry, how big is your penis?

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a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

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What did the Chicken say to the Interviewer Interviewer: how do you feel about your eggs chicken: the eggs are actually my periods. Interviewer: how do you feel about your periods ChicKen: you eat my periods everyday. people make cakes, omlettes and all these food out of my period. Imagine the world running on your period. Interviewer: what are your feelings on your periods Chicken: I have a mixture of feelings. i feel really scared because the farmers would kill me if i can have my periods. i feel glorified because the world runs on my eggs and i feel proud. I feel freaked out because the world actualy runs on my periods

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What happened to the Asian who ran into the wall with a boner? He ejaculated his sperm, impregnating the wall. The wall went to the authorities, and the man was charged with rape. He is now serving a 10 year prison sentence, with no possibility of parole.

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Wath black poeple eat for christmas your food.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

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What is more difficult than trying to get blood from a stone? Trying to teach it Japanese in the process. [L]

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What does an orange and a lemon have in common? They are both orange, exept lemon

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Ask me if I'm a tree "are you a tree?" No

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What did bob say when he was told his beloved parents were dying? "oh"

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Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

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What's funnier than 24? 9/11

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a duck wanted grapes. he didnt get any

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What's worse than burning a candle. Burning the bible. -Juanita

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I? Everett

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What do you get when you see a black man writing? A man devoted to getting a education.

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I wumbo, you wumbo, he, she, wumbo, wumbology the study of wumbo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops