Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

how do you wake up a really old man? you dont, he's probably already dead.

If you call Dani a dog one more time, lick a gooch nut suckers. XoXo Jamie <3

What did the orphan get for Christmas? Cancer.

Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

How did the American man get the Mexican man to jump over the wall? He didn't, after several attempts he then got a ladder and climbed over.

Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? The grass was getting to high and needed to be trimmed.

Why did Sally fly off the swing, She had no arms Knock knock *Who's there* Not Sally

What do you call a smelly black person? An African american with poor hygiene

What looks like a rainbow but isn't seen in the sky? A drawing of a rainbow

Want to hear a funny story? So, these to kids have cancer...

There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

Do ya like waffles? Ya we like waffles.

Why does it get hot after a basketball game? Because of the crowd all breathing out carbon dioxide and the high level of activity generating excess body heat.

(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

Knock knock. Who's there? Navy Seals. *BOOM* *waiting* "Yeah, he's dead." -Navy Seals

why did the chicken eat his brother? he was a canivore

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

Why was Osama Bin Laden so hard to find? His hiding place was difficult to come across.

yo momma so fat dora couldn't even explore her!!!

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your titties super glued to a triceritops' as cheeks while the triceritops has chronic diahrea

How do you get 50 Babies into a phone booth? A blender How do you get them out? Doritos

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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