What did the girl tell her abusive boyfriend Girl: You broke my heart! Boyfriend: I'm gonna break your face.

How to smash an apple Iphone <<<<<< Use A Hammer >>>>>>> PS : if u want to break a hammer use an iphone

Why did Winston Churchill cross the road? Grave robbery has become a huge problem lately in the United Kingdom.

Why did the Billy flunk the test? His parents were killed in a refridgerator

Always do, always will, I have overcome far worse, doctor told my mother when I was born (without a heartbeat) that I was dead, and if they somehow managed to get me breathing again (heart beating etc) I would have suffered so much brain damage that I would not have a concious mind, in other words I would never have been able to learn anything, not to speak nor to type... ...Gotta say I pretty much fucking disagree with the "good" old doctor, and for the record, my heart is as healthy as... Healthy can be I am ambidextrous, but because of this eyedrum mutant thing of mine, I cant tell left from right, because well, to my radar senses both are left and right. Sorry if I am not making much sense here, just bleed a bit out of my nose, had it been from my ears, things could have gotten ugly, but no, its all good.

Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

What's worse than a kid with a big head? Nothing you just look weird like Austin

A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

Why didn't the black man make it into heaven? No one did, there is no evidence supporting the existence of an afterlife.

what do you call a fat black cat and a skinny white dog? Freckles and Spot

What did the mexican firefighter name his 2 children? Jose and Juan.

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

How do you make a dyke moan? Insert a BEAVER in it!

What's worse than being raped? Not a whole lot-- rape is a very serious mental and emotional strain that will stick with a person for the remainder of their life.

So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road without their motives being questioned.

why are some people black? Because god decided there needs to be different people in the world therefore none are congruent

Whats more worse than a dead baby? You shouldn't be thinking about dead babies or stuff worse than them, it is sad.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was late for its laser bypass surgery.

A young boy recently saved a priests life. He found a solid lump on his testicle.

why do people take pictures in the bathroom? because they just got done taking a crap and they wanna see if they lost weight.

The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

What's red and bad for your teeth A brick

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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