Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

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what do you call a bunch of crap at the bottom of the ocean? A shitwreck!

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Q: What do you call a Jew in space? A: An astronaut you racist bastard!

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His name is Frosted Mike, and he neither has nor does not have a penis.

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What's 1+5 2+4 3+3 4+2 5+1 Whats 6+1 If you said 6 you're stupid.

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Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

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what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense, Refrigerator Sex

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a man decided to climb a tree. he got to the top,raised his arms above his head and said "I am on top of the world ". after that he fell because he was not holding on to anything

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What does a duck have in common? The further it flies the more.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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I Couldn't afford a hair cut... so i purpposely contracted HIV

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

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Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because his face was stapled to the wall.

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Yo mama so stupid, she scored poorly on her SAT exams in high school. She was unable to recieve a college education. She now works as a full time waitress at a small diner. She earns minimum wage and is still getting nowhere on her search for a better job.

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Why is the bowler right handed? He has no left hand.

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3 men of different races walk into a bar. The bartender then proceeds to ask, "what would you 3 men like?"

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

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How do you stop a black man from running? You shoot his knee caps.

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what is funnier than a apple? a talking apple

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What do you call a man with no legs? A leg-less man.

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Q: what's worse then stubing yout toe? A: getting raped by godzilla

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Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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