Why was the cat meowing really loud? It was on fire. Why did the cat suddenly stop meowing? It died.

Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

Want to hear a popular joke? Women's Rights

What do you get when you cross a Lion and a Shark? You would likely get trouble, seeing as its both animals are quite dangerous and crossing even one of them is ill advised.

2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

knock knock who's there greg greg who greg is crying because his grandma dementia made her forgot all about him

What song does the lady camel sing to seduce male camels - my humps my humps my humps my humps How did sergay the camel respond? -we dont know. He died a fatal death involving hippos in hula skirts, and flying guavas

Yo momma is so fat that....actually she's quite fit and i'd love to take her out on a date.

So this guy walks into a bar and– Nevermind it's really not that funny.

What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

Did you hear the joke about the man and the serial killer? Neither did the man since he was stabbed repeatedly and thrown into the bottom of a lake.

A lesbian and a gay both lie about there gender on eharmony, trying to get a date with someone there own gender. By coincedene, they get matched and go on a date, and both of them realize how weird this situation is and go home.

A Black man, a Latino, and a Midget get into a car. They drive to the county fair, get snow cones and ride the tilt-a-whirl.

What do you call a black man fishing. ... a fisherman racist.

What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

whats the same about a donkey and a horse? They are from the same animal classification group.

Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

What did the mother of the boy with cancer say on his birthday? - Happy Birthday, too bad you still have cancer.

Yo mumma so poor that she dosent have any money

What do you call six white guys on a bench? Six white guys at the park

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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