What's worse than celery stuck between your teeth? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what's white and long and hairy? -Dean when hes on his period

thumb_up thumb_down -12

too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why couldn't the girl go to the bathroom? Because she was obese.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's worse than a dead baby? What a sick question. Most would argue that nothing is worse than the death of an infant.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A white man and a black man enter a public toilet. When they both begin to pee, the white man looks over at the black man. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype, and then feels slightly depressed over his closet homosexuality. Both men leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself asleep that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q. what is your favorite food? A. Chicken, burritos, sandwich, rice, hot dog, turkey, duck, carrot, broccoli, eggplant, apple, blueberry, pear, raspberry, blackberry, orange, grapes fries, chips, cheese, pretzels, worms, and candy canes.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

greetings ZOE. WHAAA BANNANNAS ROCK MAH WORLD. WHY DID THE TRAIN CRASH? ....BECAUSE THE CONDUCTOR WAS A PIECE OF CHEESE! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA. WELL LOVE YA CHICAS. PEACE AND BLESSINZ. SALUTATIONS, isabel.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A guy forgot his 20th wedding anniversary. His wife was really mad, and said that she better have something in the driveway that goes from 0 to 350 in 10 seconds, and he quickly pulled out an AK-47 and murdered her violently.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

roses are red, hills are green. i know you're ugly and i know I'm so mean.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whroe whore whore whore whroe

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Did you hear about that anthony weiner guy. He is very depressed, and your mother has cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the Germans cook in their giant oven made for cooking jews? Jews.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of babies? One's used for bowling and the other's just sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why'd the kid stick ice up his nose? To keep his lunch cold.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What happened to the homeless man at midnight? He took a shit on the ground

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's the difference between a piano and a fish? A piano is an instrument, fish is an animal

thumb_up thumb_down -12

yo momma so fat dora couldn't even explore her!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: Whats metal and shiny? A: You're lame childhood accomplishments.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Your momma smells so bad that she purchased arm and hammer products to improve upon her natural scent.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops