Q: what's worse then stubing yout toe? A: getting raped by godzilla

what is funnier than a apple? a talking apple

You have small feet Do you know what small feet mean Small shoes

How do you stop a black man from running? You shoot his knee caps.

What do you call a man with no legs? A leg-less man.

3 men of different races walk into a bar. The bartender then proceeds to ask, "what would you 3 men like?"

One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

wanna hear a sad joke? you! by mad james

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

Why was the man upset? Both sides of his pillow were warm.

My dad weights 350 lbs. He decided to switch to diet soda.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

Peas

Why did Sally fall off the swings? She has no arms. Knock knock Whose there? Not Sally, she has no arms

Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

How do you take a picture of a man with a wooden leg? You can't take pictures with wooden legs.

A black and a white man walk into a grocery store the black man buys fried chicken and the white man buys vegtables. The men both have different opions and enjoy different food groups.

Ask me Whats 2+2. ? Ok what's 2 plus 2 4 you dumb ass

What is easier than making pie? Making cake!

I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

Who's a tool and a NARC? Josh Brami!

Why did the girl fall of the swing? I hit her with an axe.

Why is five afraid of six? Because six seven eight. (Note: The language of numbers is Subject-Object-Verb, rather than Subject-Verb-Object like English.)

Guns don't kill people, books kill trees.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...