Your momma's so fat she has a hard time finding clothes to fit

Why did the chiken cross the road? It didn't, J-walking is against the law.

my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

I see London, I see France. Wow! This high-speed train that travels across Europe is amazing!

There's nothing more natural than the coals under the fire...

Why did the McCann's parent's leave the window's and doors open? Because Portugal is a very hot climate, And they expected the place they were staying to be safe as lot's of tourist's stay there throughout the year.

Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

What did the caterpillar say to the robot? Nothing. Caterpillars do not have vocal chords and there are not, as yet, any truly portable robots capable of comprehending speech so to speak to one would be pointless.

3 guys are walking in the woods there are 3 paths they each take a path. the first path lead to a shed that said blowjobs 25 cents the second path lead to the same place after they all made it threw the first guy said he got a blowjob so dose the second guy. the third guy said i made 50 cents

Your mamma so fat she bungie jumped straight to hell

What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

Why couldn't Bobby attend his friends wedding? He was struck by lightning. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Bobby

Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

Whats included in over 90% of all car crashes? A Car

Why do midgets laugh when they run? The grass tickles their balls.

Why was the black man arrested? He was tried and convicted in a court of law for being an accessory to murder.

What do elves get for Christmas? Overtime.

Who won the championship last year? There was no championship

What's brown and sticky? "A stick?" No, poo.

what do you call a shitty anti-joke? A shitty anti-joke.

If all ziggles are zaggles and all zaggles are zumbles, then why is your mother a whore?

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from a fat emo girl with a knife

Two boys go down stairs on christmas day. They fall and die.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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