Why did the black man go to jail? Because he committed a criminal offense.

whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

Why didn't bob like night clubs? He was epileptic

What about the cool kids down the block. Their friend just died with a serious health condition.

Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

A naked man walks into a bar and is promptly arrested for indecent exposure.

Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

How do you stop a black man drowning? Take your foot off his head

Why didn't Suzie ride her bike? Suzie's mother aborded her. She was never born.

Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

A man walks into a bar. I don't remember the rest, but your mother's a whore.

Whats the defination of cruelty

Why did the chicken cross the road I don't know

Why did the middle-aged lady have a heart attack? Years of heavy smoking, alcohol abuse and lack of exercise had taken its toll on her body, causing it to age prematurely. @JWest

Why did Jimy fell down the stairs, because he was adopted.

How do u kill a gay man? Shoot him in the head

what is the name of the book that helen keller wrote LADIUFgSLDGFhalkjgfvcgh

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun! So I KILL YOU!!!!

why don't bears wear shoes? because they have bear feet

One day there was 3 bears, a papa bear, a mama bear, and a baby bear. They were out swimming when suddenly a girl comes over to their house and tries to sit down. She sits on the big chair and says "too big", then she sits on the little chair and says "too small" and then sits on the medium chair and says "just right". Suddenly, the bears come back. Papa bear: "somebody has been sitting on my chair!" Baby bear "somebody has been sitting on my chair too!" Mama bear "somebody has been sitting on my chair, and she still here!" The girl says "Hi my name is Goldilocks." After about few minutes introducing each other, they ate dinner and they all had a great time.

A husband and a wife were having a conversation: Woman: Why is the baby on fire? Man: I dont know. Woman: BUY ME SHOES!!!!!!

What would you do if I walked onto your property and started to smash up your mailbox with a sledge hammer? You would be very scared and most probably call the police.

What do you call a Mexican flying a plane? A pilot

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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