Why did the baby die? Lack of oxygenated blood to the brain.

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Why did Little Timmy eat Smarties before school? Because he was hungry.

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BOYS ARE DUMB AND THEY SMELL FUNNY AND IM ANGRY

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Could not care less if he is jealous, too busy living it up, anyways thanks for notifying me, and guys, I know I could call up the office and tell you all that you wont get paid if you remain reading my comments, I might not be leading by example today, but I suggest you get back to work, as for the case whose name we do not reveal here, my part is done, yes I know, you can find it under cabinet C in my office, the thick file with the color pictures (the only one with color pictures) And that is why I am taking a break, now please get back to work, as I said I could just call down at every damn office room, but that would be unfair for those that are not on horsecrap network. Thanks people, keep the flag flying. Nero your overlord Fuck formalities, im not at work today.

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I just flew in from New Zealand, and boy am I tired. It was a really long flight and I found it incredibly difficult to sleep in those seats, so I didn't bother and kept myself awake watching in-flight films the whole way.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he got hit by a car because he wasn't aware of the dangers of not looking both ways. Bufoon

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What would you call Shaquille O'Neal if he was on the moon? Shaquille O'Neal, or any nickname you may have for him.

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Nobody cares maddie!

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, You Have A Face That Belongs At The Zoo, Don't Worry I'll Be There With You, Not In The Cage But Laughing At You!!! :D

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So a Priest, a rabbi, and a monk walk into the bar... And got drinks. What did you think was going to happen?

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

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Q:Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him then slapped the ice cream out of his hand

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What do gamer see in his nightmare? a peasant build 4 houses and gets stuck between them.

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One time I said to my friend, "There are too many black people in this country." I forgot he was black.

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Knock knock knock OCD

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Where's my baby??

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Why was the girl so stupid? She had mental retardation caused my Down Syndrome.

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Q: If I have 5 pencils, and you have 3 spoons, how many pancakes will stick to the ceiling? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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Two blonds walk into a building....they couldnt see it.

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

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Would you like to go to my jinga party, if you do save the date 9/11?

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Noooooooo...

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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Have you ever tried grabbing a bottle of 7-up free and walked away with it? Moral: If it says its free, its free ffs!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops