Roses are red, and many other colors too.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock...

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Knock knock Who's there? Dave, I've got a fucking gun. Let me the fuck in.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Knock Knock The occupant uses their peephole and realizes it is a familiar face then proceeds to let them in.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping in Milwaukee? They woke him up.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge.

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An Asian girl is playing with a rubber band. She accidentally slings it into her eye, cries, and receives immediate attention from her mother.

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Why is it unpleasant to eat a meal with lots of basketball players? Because they will be focussing entirely on discussing tactics (especially if there is an upcoming game), and therefore will probably not be displaying good manners or making polite mealtime conversation.

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How do u get high, meet a leprachaun, and touch a rainbow? U find a leprechaun shoot him, steal his pot, and run up the rainbow silly!

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A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

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Why would you kill a black man? Well, murderers have different motives, the most common of these are revenge or a psychological illness.

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Why did the mouse cross the road? Because he had been attached to the chicken with a nail gun.

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A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

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Knock knock Whos there? Sorry, wrong house,goodbye!

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why did the man turn on and off the lights 20 times because he was diagnosed with O.C.D as a child

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

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How do you beat Andy Murry at tennis? KILL HIM!

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Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

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Did you hear why the peanut got arrested by walking next to another peanut? One got a-salt-ed

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Why did Steve Jobs die? Because he had cancer

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One day a black guy bought some fried chicken. The clerk said: Lol you guys always eat chicken! Lol said the black guy, yeah I am here a lot. Clerk: No I meant your kind of you know... I KNOW WHAT? Clerk: You guys at the studio next door! Oh, yeah, lol I almost thought you meant my skin color! Clerk: You fucking Negroes always thinking we are racist...

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Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

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A man walks into a bar. I don't remember the rest, but your mother's a whore.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops