Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there happened to be road in the vicinity of the fowl and the odds of the bird crossing it is very high.

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What's the difference between a Pile of Dead Babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamboghini in my garage

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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Knock knock who's threre me, I kill you

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Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name ia not Mark.

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

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Knock Knock? Why did you just say knock knock just ring the doorbell

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Do they censor Ass? TESTING TESTING ASS ASS ASS

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Why couldn't Jimmy eat his food? Because I threw a microwave at him

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"Why did Jim Jones put cyanide in the People's Temple Flavor Aid?" Because he understood that adding sugar would be bad for their teeth.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn

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Q. what do you call mexican stoners A. baked beans

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Q: What did the vomiting man say to his friend? A: BLEEEAAARRRGGHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to his wife? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGGHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the waiter in the restaurant? A: BLAAAAAARGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Leonardo DiCaprio? A: BLEEEEAAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the convenience store clerk? A: BLAAAAAARRRGGGGHHHH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to your mom? A: BLAAAARRRGGGHH!!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to Barack Obama? A: BLAAAARRRRRGGHHHH!! Q; What did the vomiting man say to the King of Saudi Arabia? A: BLAAAAAAAAAAAEEEAAARRGH! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the bartender? A: BLLLEEEEAAAARRGHHHH!!! Q: What did the vomiting man say to the funeral home director? A: BLLLEEEAAAARRRGGGHHH!!

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(two firefighters are climbing an undersea mountain in Brazil) Why do elephants fear the natural causes of silver icecream cones? Because the cars in the parking garage jump the moon while doing jumping jacks.

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Why did the airplane crash? The pilot had a stroke.

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What do you do when a burglar breaks into your house and tries to kill and rape you and you family? Nothing, he as an AK-47 and shoots you all dead and then has sex with your corpses.

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A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says, "We don't serve food here." The sandwich charges the barman for discrimination.

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Whats 9 plus 10 ... WHO FREAKIN CARES! STUPID.

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They found Michael Jackson dead in his house and found Madeleine McAnn in the cupboard 8P

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Dad, why do people say mom is a nympho? No idea son, try asking one of your other dads.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Why do I have a Virtual Boy?

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was a woman

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Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

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Run, Run, As fast as you can, You can't catch me, I'm in a car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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