Why was Joseph Kony at a primary school ? It was 3 o'clock and his children had just finished a long hard day learning to read and right and it was his turn to pick them up after him and misses Kony developed a schedule one late night after the odd glass of wine or two.

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jimmy walked into a bar, then walked out crying and all desperate seeing his wife cheating on him with another guy sitting in the bar. he jumped in front of a bus and was taken to the hospital. He died due serious injuries. Turns out that it wasn't his wife but her twin sister that neither jimmy nor his wife was aware of her existence.

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in a car crash an entire family is killed from death until they all die

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Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

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Whats white, fat, and looks like a horse? An albino horse who apparently has a high chance of diabetes.

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

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What do you call someone trying to be funny? An anti-comedian.

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How many dead babies can you fit in an oven? Depends on if you put them in the blender first.

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im trying to thing of a good joke...oh wait i got one but only one... ok ready?...oh wait...i forgot it again

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your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you are just a figment of my imagination.

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A jew walked into a bar Hitler said.... A jew walked out of a concentration camp

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Why? Because.

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Two elderly men were sat next to a children's playground... They were there to pick up their grandchildren because their parents were at work.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga in the morning You poke her face

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well for a chicken to cross a road there would need to be a farm right next a road and, the fence in the farm would have to be torn for the chicken to get out and the chicken would probably end up not crossing the road because of cars.

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Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

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A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

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Forward this anti-joke to at least 15 people And absolutely nothing extraordinary will happen in the next 10 minutes.

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Yolo Pierre because of Etzio tickle shits faggatron and individual nut join forces to become the shit suckers

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Why did the kid poop his pants? He was a baby

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whats the diferrence between a bush and an old lady? it be wierd if a bush had an old lady.

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Q: Why was the american flag red, white, and blue? A:Because that's how it is!

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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