Why did the black man go to portugal? Because he was very hard working and needed a vacation.

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Q. Why doesn't a woman need a wrist watch? A. Because they're actually becoming generally obsolete with the advent of the cell phone.

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How do you get a drummer off your doorstep? Ask politely.

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Allmighty Genie vs Common douche Genie: I the allmighty Genie am at your command, I can grant you any three WISHES Common douche: Okay! I want to sit on my own lap Genie: Uh...Well...You uh sure you want that? I Uh... Wait a moment please... Wimp wins Genieous victory.

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What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was persecuted for his faith.

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How do you make a clown happy then sad? You give him pot then shoot him in the foot

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What did the deaf blonde say to the brunette? Nothing.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My farts stink, And so do you.

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Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

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Which is heavier, a tonne of feathers or a tonne of lead? It doesn't matter when your loved ones are being torn apart by bears.

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Why do black people like watermelon? Because it good you racist bastard!

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to prove he wasn't chicken

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How do you make a fat man cry? You call him fat.

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A man walks into a bar. He realizes that he would need a designated driver if he would want to return home safely. So he then leaves.

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Roses are red. Violets are violet.

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How do you call the uncle who molested you as a child? More than likely with a telephone.

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So an Alex Gedrose walks into a bar, and orders peanut butter and jelly toast on buttermilk with extra Linda on the side.

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A man was found dead, in an ice cream van, the other day. He was covered from head to toe in hundreds and thousands, with two flakes sticking out of his ears. The police say it was a tragedy and will be informing his next of kin in the next few days.

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Why did Mr. Cannon dies Because he got shot as an undercover cop in south america

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Now that we got our colors straight. Hey, how ya doin?

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Did you hear about the sea cow who sang "Part of your Herd?" It was the Little Moomaid.

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Hey I just meet you. And this is crazy, but im a Zombie. And you looks tasty!

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every cloud has a silver lining

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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