What sits in the corner of a room and gets smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler.

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What did the hose say to the sprinkler? I'm gonna squirt you.

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A midget, a nun, and a kangaroo walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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Why did the man commit suicide? He was depressed.

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Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

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If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

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What's long and hard and full of semen? An erect penis at the climax of an orgasm.

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What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

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You in love with me? Like platonic? Fine, we will move operations elsewhere, you really got to tell me who you are working for someday.

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Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

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Q:what do you call someone who spends 7 hours a day playing video games? A: Someone who takes pride and joy from gaming

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You mom is to dumb when she herd about Walgreens she thout all the walls were green

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What is the best part about being a rapist? The orgasms.

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a black man, a Jew, a Chinese man and a polar bear walk into a bar, the bar tender says sorry no animals allowed in the bar, so the polar bear left and the other three ordered some drinks and had a nice time

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Friends are a lot like trees I just thought you should know.

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XD That one was awesome Nero, for a moment I was really wondering if you refer towards a tough guy as yourself as a boy. Now you pretty lucky I like tough guys, and you always have a savage joke at hand don't you?

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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A. Why did the boy cross the road? B. Why? A. I don't know! That's why I'm asking you.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 8, 9, 10

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What do u get when u lick chicken Answer- Your a retard if you did not figure it out it is obviously chicken taste DERP!

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What is the difference between a pig and a crow? One is a animal that Is butchered to be eaten as a wonderful meat product. And the other is a pretentious asshole bird that no one likes.

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What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

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Girl 1- why was 6 afraid of 7? dog- ..................................(doesn't say anything because dogs can't ruff)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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