a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

What happened when the man turned on his TV? It was tuned to the Discovery Channel

Why did the guy lose the race? Because he had explosive diarrhea

boling water: why is it taking so long for you to get hard? egg: sorry, it's just because i recently got laid by a chick.

what was so bad about hitler? he inadvertently subjected his political officials to death by rope

What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

Q. why did the girl fall off the swing? A. Because she had no arms.

How did the clown get the baby to stop crying? He hit it with an axe.

Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

How can a black person and a white person be friends? The civil right's movement.

Why do Jews have such big noses? They don't; To suggest phenotypic variation along religious lines is preposterous.

How did the frog fly? It drank a magic potion. How did the snake fly? It ate the frog How the the eagle fly? It already can.

P1: why did the chicken cross the road? P2: to get to the other side. P1: Knock! Knock! P2: whos there? P1: THE CHICKEN!

What musical band do you get if you keep shouting while in the mountain? The rolling stones. What do you get if you keep shouting in a snow covered mountain top? Blizzard Entertainment.

What is the only non-racist animal? The mexican panda. Why? It's black, white, hispanic, and asian.

A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde go on vacation in Hawaii. They plan to swim to the next island. The brunette and redhead do it with no problem. The blonde swims halfway and realizes she is tired. She continues to swim straight ahead knowing her friends are already at the next island.

Whats brown and sticky? A stick.

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

how do you stop a rhino from charging? you shoot it with a gun until it's either dead or no longer charging at you because thats a highly dangerous situation.

Why was the black man arrested? He was tried and convicted in a court of law for being an accessory to murder.

anti jokes are really funny

A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

why did the chicken cross the road? who cares?

What's upside down? umop apisdn

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...