How did the boy fall off his bike? A fridge was thrown off him

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Your mama's so fat that when she farted, gas came out!

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What did the text-to-speech reader say when the 12 year old boy played around with it? "Ass ass ass ass, ass ass ass ass."

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.why did 6 hate 7 and 8? because they were blocking her from 9!

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What do you do when your wife is about have a baby? Throw her off the balcony go into parking lot and reach into her mouth if you feel a leg stab her in the belly button untill her intestines are coming out and burn the body singing Elmo's world

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What's the best way to make people notice you? Begin a cult that follows some crazy religious division and go on mass murdering sprees, looting, murdering, and raping everything that moves. Your prime targets should be schools, orphanages, and hospitals (maternity wards for bonus points). Eventually, walk up to the FBI unarmed and have them capture you. Then demand that you get interviewed, as you have instructed your followers that if you don't get to speak on public television, they will bomb multiple major cities. When they put you on TV, simply stare at the camera and say: "Senpai. The time has finally come for you to notice me." Then, because you are a cruel, heartless bastard with no morals whatsoever, have your men bomb the major cities anyway. Have fun!

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Why do showers have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers

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Why did I get thumbs up from everyone? Answer: Because they like my anti-joke.

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Q: what do you call a person who's ass is dumb A: a dumbass

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What do you call a black man in green shoes and a yellow hat ? Nothing,thats just him pursuing in his own regular casual outfit there for you would just notice him as a normal man walking around with shoes and a hat on so there is nothing to call him

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why did you read this anti-joke? because you typed in antijoke on google or have the app on a phone

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Why did the Asian ace the test? Because she had worked very diligently, taken copious notses, and studied fervently until she had a thorough mastery of the topic.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face. The horse replies, neigh.

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What did the deaf blonde say to the brunette? Nothing.

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Why did they choose Madonna to perform in the halftime show? Because she might die soon.

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Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

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What's worse than seven babies in a trashcan? Not much.

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What did the zen master say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything,

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Why do cats have nine lives? Because they don't have ten.

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Did you see Helen Keller at the movie theater? I didn't either, she's dead.

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Hey there, I like bananas! No you don't.

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A man was found dead, in an ice cream van, the other day. He was covered from head to toe in hundreds and thousands, with two flakes sticking out of his ears. The police say it was a tragedy and will be informing his next of kin in the next few days.

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Weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee

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Your momma is so fat, she has her own gravitational pull.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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