Did you hear about the kidnapping in Pennsylvania? He woke up...

Whats brown and a fag? A bundle of sticks

Knock Knock? Who's There? Sgt Constable Ian. Sgt Constable Ian Who? It's Sgt Constable Ian - I'm here to see you about your alleged rape charges.

Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It escaped.

Immaculate Misconception - Motionless In White \m/

Your Mom was so fat he made herself Liposuction Twice

what did the kid with no hair get for christmas? cancer.

Did you know that you can drink lava? You can only do it once though.

Why did the wolf cry boy? Cause he was a pedifile.

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

whats the same about a donkey and a horse? They are from the same animal classification group.

This is an anti-joke. It is not funny because "anti" means the opposite of something.

What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

Q: What's worse than burning your tongue on hot chocolate. A: Getting shanked by a homeless man

Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

Stalin and Hitler went to Kmart to buy mini-toothpaste. Because they schleifen schlafanned on their way to the country club.

What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

Q: Why are there no tablets in the jungle? A: The pharmaceutical logistics involved would be enormous and would make very little business sense.

An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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