Q: Why did the black man run from the chainsaw? A: Someone was trying to kill him with it.

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There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. Coincidentally, it was also Tuesday.

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What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

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A classic (apologies if it's been posted before): A woman was riding the bus home after a day of shopping. Suddenly she jumped up, shouting "may aspirins! My aspirins!" The driver replied: "You probably left them on the counter at the drugstore."

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There is an American, a Mexican, and a Muslim on a plane They give the American the 1 parachute and the Mexican and the north koreon explode

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Why? Because.

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Its over 9000 penises and they're all raping little children!!!!!

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Why did Helen Keller cross the road? Hoefuwpugosihfioapfsoihosw[

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OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

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A duck walks into a bar and orders 2 beers and a shot. The bartender says "That'll be four fifty." The duck says he doesn't have any money and asks if the bartender can put it on his bill. The bartender says "No." He then picked the duck up by the neck and raped him mercilessly. "That's what he gets" one patron said. "Yeah, he was asking for it"

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Why didn't gram-pa give his grandson a Birthday present? Because he had Alzheimer's and forgot about him.

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question: why did the dog whine? answer: Because it wanted the freakin bone

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What do you call a black man on the moon An astronaut

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Denard Robinson

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If you just read this, You're dead.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

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What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

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a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

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I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

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Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

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hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

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Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

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What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

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A blond is on her way driving to the airport when she sees the sign "Airport left." She made a left turn and got to her flight on time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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