Roses are red,Here's something new ,violets are violets,not ******* blue

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what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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Why can't monkeys and kuala bears get along? Because they are two entirely different species that cannot communicate with each other...

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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A boy in Bible class was poking a girl in front of him with a pencil. Atfer, maybe ten minutes of this, she was asked "Sarah, what did Eve say to Adam after they had had twenty-seven children" The boy poked her with the pencil again. She stood up, and said "I think we have enough kids Adam."

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 8, 9, 10

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A apple is red a banana is to never mind that joke sucks

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an orange and finding a worm.

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Jesus saves, passes to Moses who shoots and scores!!!

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Q: What do you call half of the worlds population of black people on the moon. A: Close enough.

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whats a joke... Parker Coffey at life

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Your mom is so ugly, Ew.

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How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

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Roses are red violets are blue What the heck do flowers Have to do with You?

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Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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A Gamer walks into the tavern, the bartender says to him, "just dont act like you control the place!"

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I just sharpened this hatchet Don't make me use it!

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How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

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What is the connection between a blonde and a halogen headlamp? There is none, one is a female human being with blonde hair and the other is a headlamp with a halogen lightbulb.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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