How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

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did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

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why did the man beat his wife? why not?

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Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

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What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

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-I have an idea! Let's play twenty questions! -Alright! But i have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

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How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

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What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

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What did the indian boy say to his friend? He didn't he was too busy studying

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How many raisins can you fit in a box? It depends on the size of the raisins and the box.

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Why is Stevie Wonder called Stevie Wonder? Wonder where I am.

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Why did dallin fall off the swing he got hit by jds big penis

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i got a boner, from looking at you

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What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

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What do you get if you convict a white man of murder? A black man in prison.

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Whats worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple...

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Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

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What did the muslim do at the airport? He bought a ticket to New York and proceeded to fly there to mourn his brother who was killed during the terrorist attacks on 9/11.

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knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

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how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

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A lion, a leopard, a sheep, and a flesh eating New Zealand parrot stalk, trot and fly, respectively, into a bar. The parrot lands on the the sheep's back and begins to tear into its flesh in order to reach the succulent deposits of fatty tissue located around the sheep's kidneys. "Ouch!" Said the sheep. "Why would you do that? Oh, the pain! The pain!" "Squak!", Replied the NZ parrot, wiping blood of its sharp, hooked beak on the counter. "I think," Began the lion, "This parrot from New Zealand is hungry for fat from a sheep's soft, woolly back." The sheep's wool was now damp with blood. "Perhaps this parrot from New Zealand wants sheep fat from its soft woolly back." "Ah!" Said the sheep. "This parrot from New Zealand wants sheep fat from my soft woolly back!" "Yes", Replied the lion. "You could also say..." Started the sheep, "That an NZ parro-" The sheep did not finish his sentence. He died from his wounds. The lion left. The parrot flew off to tear up some windshield wipers. And the leopard stashed the sheep carcass in a tree branch for later consumption.

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Why didn't the African kid eat lunch? He wasn't hungry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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