- Anti Joke

Roses are red Bacon is red Poems are hard Bacon

Your mother is so stupid because as a child, she was unable to keep up with what was being taught as she unfortunately had a learning disability.

binladin walks into the american seals

You're such a dork you were found on the bottom of a whale.

whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

Q: Whats the difference between a trash can full of dead babies, and a porch? A: A porch isnt in my garage.

Why did a black man enter a KFC? Because he had been in town a while and had grown hungry over the period of walking around, and decided he should get some food to satisfy his hunger so he may continue his journey around town. The fact he entered KFC is purely coincidental, as he could've easily decided to go to a different eatery, but it just so happens that the closest one was a KFC.

How many drugs does it take for Eminem to sing in a live concert? Enough.

Why did the butcher have blood on his hands? He murdered his daughter.

knock knock Get off my porch I've already called the police.

what did the brick say to the other brick? hello. the guy next to the bricks was shocked and went home and killed his wife then later higherd an indian man to give him a lapdance.

whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? babies aren't fruit.

Q. What did the atheist ask the pregnant woman? A. You gonna eat that?

Nero: Farewell to my past last part aka No more forced psychiatric evaluations for me. My psychiatric evaluator asked me why I consider myself a souless demon and not a man. My answer was: My mothers name was Maria, my brothers name is Kristoffer and my real father (which I only met once which was meaningless) is a Chatolic priest. Then I showed her (my psychiatric evaluator) my passport, my name is not Nero Angelo, nor whatever my parents might have told others but rather Angelo Nero. So lets conclude shall we? Nero Angelo = Angel black. and some Capcom shit. Angelo Nero = Says on my birth certificate, means Black Angel. Kristoffer= The sacrifice of Christ my half brother. Ricardo my non real father = which has nothing to do with Josef... Thank F*CK! So yeah, some of you might recognize me, but I have not met any family members the last 16 years, so if you where planing to judge me the next time you see me, you better run instead, because I will... "pacify" you for just watching while my parents waterboarded me, for just standing there while my mother tried excorzise me away while beating the crap out of me. I WILL "remove you, forever" the only family I got, are my 2.755 or so members of my movement Neronism, and my wife`s family, this is not a threat.... ...Its a promise to me, and to you. Make no mistake though, Neronism has over 60.000 members worldwide, but I dont care about them, enough is enough. Maria: My birthmother which claimed long before I was born that she was a virgin and as thus that she was giving birth to the anti-christ. (me, thanks mom) Then my psychiatric evaluator asked me if I truly believed I was a demon, where I told her that "human" is just a term, and that I know that calling myself a demon is just a way of coping with my past. She suggested that now that my troubles/parents are over/dead, that my need for her or anyone evaluating me further is over and she jokingly rated me a 100 percent "fresh" when I asked her if I was still a rotten tomato, so I am officially out from the "realm" of psychiatry (which I was forced to after killing my father in self defense). Its been fucking 27 years since, bt finally I am fucking happy... And the hell if there is humanity left in me... >:) M.Biso... I mean Nero. Merry christmas everybody, I know mine is not so bad after all... ill probably spend more time here, but farewell for now, and finally I can scratch the shit out of my ortopedic arm without getting PTSD`s of my non real father tearing my head off... AAAAAAAAAND all is good... Except the fucking itch...

Why'd the gay man get fired from the sperm bank? He was repeatedly late to work.

A black man and a white man get married... Trick question, since gay marriage is illegal in the United States, the men did not get married, and they later both died alone.

What's worse than a bruise in your knee? A bruise in your other knee. And what is worse than that? The Holocaust. And what is worse than that? A second Holocaust, much bigger, with much more casualties.

What did one wardrobe say to another wardrobe? Clothes.

Farlingaye high school :L what a crap place!

Roses are red, Violets are rare because of the irreversible damage to our ecosystem in recent years.

What do you call it when a black man kills an Asian man? Murder.

What's grey and can't fly? A castle

Why did the little girl walk into the wall? Because she was blind.

How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb? Obviously more than six because my bass meant is still dark.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops