What did the slutty blonde get her boyfriend for Valentine's Day? Nothing because she had died of AIDS months ago.

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guess what? bannanas

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Why was the little Asian boy crying at the county fair? He had just watched his entire family get brutally crushed beneath the weight of the old ferris wheel as they went to get on. Never would he forget the painful screams of his mother as her blood splashed onto his white t-shirt. Never would he forget the police car ride to the foster home when it all sank in that they were truly gone. And never would he forget the abuse his new parents would inflict on him daily. But what would forever torment him most were those screams. Those persistent screams that woke him in the night until the day he died many, many years later.

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What day is it today? Today. Thank you. You're welcome.

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Why was a black man in a prison cell? He was a highly respected plumber fixing a prisoner's faulty toilet.

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What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

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Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are potentially dangerous weapons that may inflict bodily harm.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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Why did the young boy hit the other young boy? Because the other young boy was bullying his friend and he thought it was time he should stand up for himself and take control of the situation.

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A fat man walks into a gym, and comes out fatter

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Two men fought over a bag of peanuts. The peanuts won.

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What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

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what happened to the batsman with bad footwork? he got out what did the batsman do when he got out? he left the ground due to the nature of the ruling

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What does a grandmas vagina taste like? I don't know -- nor do I want to.

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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

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Two Chav's jump off a cliff who wins? Neither, the affects of gravity are equal despite the weight of said object.

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You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

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What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

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Q Why did the chicken cross the road? A Because it couldn't fly

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Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

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Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

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what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

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Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

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You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops