Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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What did the man say when he lost his car? Where the fuck did my car go

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whats orange and cant talk? an orange

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guess what? bannanas

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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Why did the bear turn red? Because he was emBEARessed. Nah just kidding, a hunter shot him.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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What did the farmer say to the cow that asked for food? No.

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Why did the teenager drink a beer? Because it was actually full of sizzurp

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I may be ugly, but I'm also dumb.

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Why did the little boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a washing machine at him.

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A cat walks into a bar. The bartender says "What would you like to drink?" The cat says "Meow."

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How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

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How many black people does it take to solve a complex physics equation? Trick question

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who is there? Not Suzie

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Knock Knock who's there its black george washington.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

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What do you call a black man with a peg leg? Disabled

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Yo mamas so poor, she should probably find a source of consistent payment to support herself.

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Q Why did the chicken cross the road? A Because it couldn't fly

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WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

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why was Lucy fat? Her BMI was over the recommended average.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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