Why did the puerto rican cross the road? To get back to his country, but then he realized there wasn't a road then fell in the ocean and drowned.

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what's blue and looks like a shirt? a blue shirt

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How old are you? 7

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How high is the grass in Germany? Approximately the same height as the grass in America.

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You know what makes me smile? Facial muscles.

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What's hot and cold at the same time? Hotcold.

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Why was the man foolish for buying a new lamp? Because he lived in a small shack with no electricity and was probably going to die soon.

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A black and a white man walk into a grocery store the black man buys fried chicken and the white man buys vegtables. The men both have different opions and enjoy different food groups.

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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really? are people insistantly so totally stupid? Now read that again and you may notice something. :P

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Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

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Why'd the blonde jump out the window? To kill herself

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How do you make a baby stop crying?you scream at it and throw it at wall

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Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead!!!!

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A man walks into a bar, he then proceeds to purchase his favorite alcoholic beverage.

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why did the chicken eat his brother? he was a canivore

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How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to drop it and die of gas poisoning.

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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What happens when you drop a glass of milk? It hits the ground and breaks, depending on what material the glass is made of, acrylic glass or plastic, and the softness of the floor you drop it on,

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Why did the jew cross the road Because he was being cornered by 10 nazis that had automatic guns

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Why did a kid throw a clock out the window? Because he was adopted

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Did you hear about that anthony weiner guy. He is very depressed, and your mother has cancer.

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OK, Billy went to his friend Fred in the tree. And then went inside to get a snack. Then Fred fell out of the Tree and.....landed on a comfy mattress.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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