A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

why was the fat man excercizing? because he was a fatass and no one liked him

This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well shit whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: Someone who just got stabbed to death reading the newspaper.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? You're mom. It's your.

Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

Q.How many blonds does it take to change a light bulb? A.1

Knock Knock Who's There No-one your not very popular

A blind man walks into a bar. He had a few drinks then went home.

what is your moms favorite website? Wait did I say mom. Oh I'm not very sorry.

A Black Guy, A Rabbi, And A Mexican walk into a bar, the bartender looks up and says "Get Outta Here We're Closed!"

How do you make a Dead Baby Float..... ......With 3 scoops of ice cream and 1 cup of liquid stem cells.

so a man walks into a store looking for a new sheet,the cashier he goes to is chinese He leaves with a new sheet and is satisfied with it,oh wait,he gave me a pile of shit,sorry guys i had to -chuckles

Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

Why do women wear perfume and makeup? They smell bad and they're ugly.

Who looks like a bird and can fly to hogwarts? Dean McKee. his scar is f u c k i n g rotten

american idol

Knock knock. Who's there? The police, you murdered ten people.

Why does Snoop Dogg have an umberella? For shielding himself from the rain.

What did Han Solo say to Chewy before they got in the Millennium Falcon? Chewy, get in the ship.

Why did John get hard? He froze to death

How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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