Q: Whats metal and shiny? A: You're lame childhood accomplishments.

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Geography Teacher: What caused the earthquake of Japan? Me: Godzilla constipated too hard, and it caused an earthquake. Tsunami was the result of his poo. Geography Teacher: then how do you explain the after shocks...? Me: Godzilla shat his pants after the toilet

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Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? Because he's dead!

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One early Christmas morning i went downstairs. My mother told me that she had gotten me the ultimate stocking stuffer. It was a foot

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Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

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A Russian man walks out of a bar looking very sober because he walked out of the bar sober.

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What's round and bounces A basketball No!!!!!!! You dummy!!! Then what? Boobies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

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i hate it when people repeat the same jokes. i just hate it when people repeat the same jokes.

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A terrorist robs a walrus.

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How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

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I will grant you one wish, but it sure as hell isn't coming true!

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What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

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Why was Osama Bin Laden so hard to find? His hiding place was difficult to come across.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle.

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What do a worm and a human have in common? They both have arms and legs apart from the worm

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why did the black man start crying? because his ancestors were treated horribly

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What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

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NEVER

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A man asks his doctor if you can die from drinking to much water. The doctor replies 'Yes you can'

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

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what did the jew get for Christmas? cancer. and aids

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I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

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Q: What did the giraffe say to the sunflower? A: I like your shoelaces!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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