how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

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A: Knock knock. B: Come in. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ?cash(p)

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What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

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knock knock whose there? you have AIDS

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Q. what happend to the guy who walked by an alley in new york? A. he got beat up by a robber wich took hes money, cellphone, keys and his abillity to walk.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Jews

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What's the difference between a man and a woman? Generally speaking- biology, except in cases of transexuality.

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News of the day - David gives back 2 pounds to someone. The police, as he stole from a old nana to pay for a toothbrush

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A baby boy and a baby girl are much alike they both taste good

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Why was Michael Jackson so bad at dancing? Because he had a broken leg.

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Once there was an English man, A Scottish man and an Irsh man. They were all in a scenario where each of them had to undetake a task. The English man and the Scottish man undertook their task without any problems, but the Irish man was confused resulting in a hilarious outcome.

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your mom is so fat, that your father is no longer attracted to her and it is tearing your family apart.

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A person affected by Alzheimer's is asked a knock knock question- Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Wait what are we doing again?

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What happens when a drunk driver meets a stoned driver? A head on collision

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Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

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What do you call a white guy pointing a gun at someone? A member of the United States Army.

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How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

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If you say "Hi" to every tree you pass, is that being environmentally friendly?

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Why was the unemployed dolphin trainer so sad? His life has no purpoise. In an unrelated topic, how is he unemployed id he is a dolphin trainer?

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Roses are red, The grass is greener, Every time i'm with you, I touch my wiener.

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If you could eliminate one thing in your life, what would it be ? My ex.

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What did the blind man say to his wife? -would you mind helping me upstairs, for I cannot see.

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A man walks into a bar, and then a second man walks into a bar. The third man ducked.

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Why did the man walk into the grocery store? Because he had run out of peanut butter

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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