How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe Coolhsoj

roses are red, violets are blue. sunflowers are yellow, i bet you were expecting something romantic but no this is just gardening facts.

I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

A guy walks into a bar. He meets a girl and they have a great time. He calls her the next day and their relationship continues for many months. Eventually they get married and have children.

What did the black boy get for Christmas? A bike his parents bought him.

Why aren't fish good at telling jokes? Their neural structure isn't capable of processing languages or creating a method of communicating with humans, thus they both do not know any jokes since they are incapable of understanding the concept of humour.

a brick cheats on another brick the brick finds out and dose nothing because it is a brick

Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

-I have an idea! Let's play twenty questions! -Alright! But i have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

What was so incredible about this bigger new oven i just bought? It could fit twice as many Jews in it. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

What does the redhead miss most at a party? Her father. He was in a car accident when she was young.

A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

what did the guy say when he lost his sandwich? wheres my sandwich?

How do you have se with hellen keller? Very sweetly

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

An overweight man is at a gym. he is trying to lose weight because he feels uncomfortable with his size.

roses are red, violets are are blue, I have five fingers, the middle one is for you

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, horse, we don't serve your kind here." The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse," says the bartender, "I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse, are you deaf? I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out, knocking over a stool with his tail.

Betty wanted to see time fly so she threw her alarm clock out the window. Shortly after, her mother grounded her as it was quite expensive and she had become less punctual without it.

What happened when Stephen Hawking tried to go down the stairs? He fell and suffered minor injuries.

knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

johnny goes to the shops asks the lady at the counter, can i go home The Lady says ..... Buy one get one free

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...