What did the disabled kid do on friday? He fell down a flight of stairs.

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One linners President Kinnedy did you like the parade President Lincon did you like the play

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Bill goes and buys 45 watermelons, what does he have? 45 watermelons.

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Whats wrong with me? Your alive.

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What do you call a black man? A normal human being

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A baby walks into a bar and the bartender says.... Where is your mom?

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Q: If I have 5 pencils, and you have 3 spoons, how many pancakes will stick to the ceiling? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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Why did the math student refuse to do his geometry homework? Straight lines do not exist, so there is no real world application to any geometric shape.

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your mumma so fat when she stepped on the scales it said her phone number

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An alligator crawled into a bar Animal control is promptly called and he is released in a nearby lake

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A man walks into a bar. He then walks out of the bar a while after. He then goes home and goes to bed. And then he goes to sleep. And then in an odd time travel paradox,a T-Rex arrives from the past and kills him and his entire family.

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So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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What did the little boy get from his parents on Christmas? Nothing. His parents died 2 nights before in a tragic car crash.

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Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? Because it was sold out

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What would you do for a klondike bar? Walk to the corner store to buy one.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Women's rights.

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What dinosaur makes honey? The Bee Rex.

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Why was the little girl crying in the woods at night? There was psychotic killer chasing her with a chainsaw.

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Where do babies come from? You fathers penis.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Knock knock. I've got a gun. Knock kn [*BANG!*] [L]

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What do you call a spoiled black daughter? Tiana (Disney Princess)

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What's the relationship between a frog and a building? They have nothing to do with each other so stop trying to figure out this query.

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A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer walk into a bar. They order some drinks, sit quietly and stare at their shoes until they've finished their drinks, then go back home and wallow in loneliness, wishing their social skills weren't so abysmal.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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