how did superman die? he got cought in a plane engine!

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What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

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What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

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Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

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I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

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What did the man say when he lost his car? Where the fuck did my car go

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About numbers, it was 180 mg of valium... And I am going to live becausepeople got there in time, my heart never stopped because luck, the doc was only making a joke about me "having ingested enough valium to die at least twice". Sanders, I just got your girlfriend to agree to a threesome, if my banana ever wakes up again, AND WHEN... Thou areth forgiven, btw I sent him a picture of Line`s unshaved vagina, and a note stating: U recognize this? Find out more on horsehead network! Meh His name is Anders something Chattington, yeah for all that know him, guess whose finger is on her unshaven... Yeah, maybe you should not have messed with a guy that can have ANYONE. Ps: Then its your mother, then your sister which is 17 (and pretty 16 is legal here so fuck you Chatty!) and then I SHALL STRIKE THY WITH THE VENGEANCE OF A THOUSAND SUNS! Because you are forgiven, which I cant even remember what means, I mean I know I am typing my experiences here, but thats only because I remember by muscle memory where the buttons are, said the doctor... I can still play Snes emulators... Not, because my numb fingers cant click anything and Line is gone. I TOUCHED HER ALREADY YA KNO! YOU SAW THE PIC, My skin is tan, and... well you know she is here... The best part? She is totally okay with you knowing, sayonara pal, id watch the "fluor" in your mothers pussy the next time you eat it!

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http://cache.deadspin.com/assets/resources/2008/04/Deer_mating2.jpg

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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who do you call when you see a ghost in your apartment? The Mental Hospital.

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What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist! Jk a terrorist

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Seriously, I am going to tell you, but you know, what would you have preferred that it was if you could choose, I am kinda insecure about these things, and people can read these messages so...

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Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

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noah is a scrub jungle

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Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

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What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

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Q: whats white and smells like shit A: my ass

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your in court a woman police officer says anything you say can and will be held against you. the man replies titty

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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What did the mom tell her son who she caught masticating loudly? "Do it with your mouth closed!"

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Yo momma so fat, when she walks she wakes the dead -Ryan Vallee

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Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

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Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone? Because a skyscraper landed on him. Yes. A skyscraper.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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