A man walks into a bar and orders a pop because he was a designated driver

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How many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb about 4

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Why was it sad for black guys drove off a cliff? There two more seats

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What's worse than finding a knife in your car? Finding a car in your knife.

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Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

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why did the kitten drink its milk? because it doesnt have a motor so has no need for petrol.

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Q:How many Elephants can you fit in a Audi quatro? A:It just sits on a leaf and waits for the autumn... Moral: Just sits on a three and waits for it to turn into four.

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This guy went to the store because he needed potatoes. So he asked the clerk where the potatoes were at and she said "Isle fiveeeeeee!" So he went there and there were no potatoes ! hahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahajhahahahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahhahahhahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahahhahaahhahahahahahahaahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhaahhahaahahahahahhhhahha

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What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

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Why was Michael Jackson so bad at dancing? Because he had a broken leg.

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

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What did the little girl get for Christmas? A pipe bomb

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How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to drop it and die of gas poisoning.

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A frog walks up to Steve, and says "Hey, Steve." Steve is terrified because a frog knows his name, and is walking.

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what's the worst lie in the universe? I swear to god that was my last piece of gum

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Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

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A man asks his doctor if you can die from drinking to much water. The doctor replies 'Yes you can'

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What do bluejays and cardinals have in common? They both Were born during the Medevil period.

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wh did a man all of his bike? It was a wet and slippery day, he had a lack of control and concentration

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Why didn't the little boy have a good time at his birthday party? Because his friends lit him on fire.

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What do you call your mother's bipolar brother with three arms? Uncle.

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One sux, the other is decent. But supporting the sucky one shows u are dedicated.

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Roses are Red Violets or Red Trees are Red HOLY SH*T MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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