Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And so are you But the roses have wiltered The violets are dead The sugar bowl is empty And so is your head

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Knock knock Who's there? *silence* WHO'S THERE? *silence* -Looks out window- Slenderman

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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A man walked into a bar.He woke up hours later and went home. By TheRealPaddock

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a man walks into a bar, when he leaves he thinks he can hold his liquor and kills a mother and two children attempting to drive home.

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Why did the donkey cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? Heehaw!

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We started this thing together, I do not get it, he is like you said, just a little nerd...

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I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

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There is an American, a Mexican, and a Muslim on a plane They give the American the 1 parachute and the Mexican and the north koreon explode

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Why? Because.

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Its over 9000 penises and they're all raping little children!!!!!

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Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

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what is your moms favorite website? Wait did I say mom. Oh I'm not very sorry.

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whats worse than getting bit by a tick. getting bit by a deer tick that as lyme disease.

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What is green and fuzzy and can kill you when it falls out of a tree A pooltable

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A duck walks into a bar and orders 2 beers and a shot. The bartender says "That'll be four fifty." The duck says he doesn't have any money and asks if the bartender can put it on his bill. The bartender says "No." He then picked the duck up by the neck and raped him mercilessly. "That's what he gets" one patron said. "Yeah, he was asking for it"

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What do an eagle and a mole have in common? They both fly, except for the mole.

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Forward this anti-joke to at least 15 people And absolutely nothing extraordinary will happen in the next 10 minutes.

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if you want to see somthing funny, throw a small child imbertween two catholic priests!

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If you just read this, You're dead.

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a dog jumping up and catching a frisbi

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What happened to the woman driver who drove to Tesco? Due to the pleasant traffic conditions, she arrived slightly earlier than expected and she finished her weekly shop in forty minutes. She returned home, once again in good traffic and ate a delicious lunch of sausages and chips.

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Voldemort's nose is so flat, that it looks like he doesn't have a nose.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops