Why did the blonde turn down prostitution? She knows it is illegal and has better moral values than that.

whats gay and american? a gay american

i dont care if you rate me or not

What do you call someone who has slept for 48 hours straight? Dead.

How do you confuse a Mexican? Stand in the middle of a crosswalk while shouting "Cthulu will rise!" whilst looking at the sky and playing "Everybody Have Fun Tonight" by Wang Chung. Works every time.

What did the man with cancer get for his birthday? A gravestone.

like this or you will die at some point in your life

There's a football player who walks into a bar and sees a gay guy. The gay guy says, "So you're a football player, right?" The football player says, "Yes." The gay guy says, "I have a game of football myself. It's called fart football. It's where you drink a mug of beer in less than five seconds and then you drop your pants and fart for the extra point." The gay guy goes first. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds and farts. The football player goes. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds then he drops his pants and before he farts, the gay guy says, "BLOCK THAT KICK! BLOCK THAT KICK!"

Q. What do you get if you cross a suspicious person with a paranoid person? A. Who wants to know

You haven't happened to see a cigarette truck around here have you? What's a truck?

Nathaniel Nugnes walks into a bra

How did the seal die? It went clubbing ... Then overdosed on ecstasy, it was very sad.

What did the worm a fisherman used to catch fish called when the worm killed a trout? Master Bate.

How did the mexican die while fixing a lightbulb? He fell off the ladder.

What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Nothing. I killed them both with a fire axe and proceeded to kill all the patients in the hospital.

It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

What do you call 100 dead babies in my garage? Murder.

your mommas so fat she jumped for joy and got stuck

When life gives you lemons, Commit felonies

Correct grammar and proper use of capitals on the internet. Oh yeah, and a horse walked into a bar. It didn't think much of it.

what comes in a can ? Beans Where do beans come from ? Cans

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? No? Well he graduated in four years with a degree in chemical engineering. He worked hard all four years in order to keep his scholarship to the university. Now he leads a very successful life and lives in a large house with his wife and two children.

Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: Someone who just got stabbed to death reading the newspaper.

A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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