The speakers on my computer were broken, so I was going to replace them with John Boehner. Because he is the SPEAKER of the house.

Three black guys go to the mall, they proceed to have a grand time!

A man died and went to heaven. Luckily, he was resuscitated by a trained medical professional, and after a stern warning from his doctor, he lost weight, limited the cholesterol in his diet, and went on to live a very happy and healthy life.

Where does Mario go after you finish the game? Drug rehab.

What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

what did the duck with roller skates say to the camel? how are the wife and kids?

Why did the kid lay down? Because his legs were chopped off

If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

Three Jews walked into a bar. I lied... it was a gas chamber.

Hey I just met you. And this is crazy. So get in my van. Cause I have candy.

What did the stick of butter say to the lemon? "I'm a stick of butter"

The Dali Lama walks into a pizza parlor and asks the owner to make him one with everything. After 20 minutes or so the owner brings the Dali Lama a pizza with every available topping. After he finished eating the Dali Lama thanked the owner and left a nice tip.

My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

What did the hobo get for Christmas? Hypothermia

blargen fa-diddle nachen!

What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

What did the cat say when it was hungry? Meow.

roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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