knock knock who's there? the man the man who? the man who murdered your whole family

What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

When I see the Viagra commercial telling you about all the side effects and they say "if you have an erection lasting for more than 4 hours, call a doctor." If I have an erection that lasts that long, I'm not calling a doctor. I'm calling my mom; who I always call when I'm sick.

Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

what do you call a man that has a terminal illness and is named James - James

roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

A homeless guy was walking along the beach when all of a sudden he see's what looked like to be magic genie's lamp so he pick the lamp up whipes it off then sells it for black tar herion.

What did the pirate say to the ninja? I have aids.

Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

Knock Knock Nobody Nobody who? Nobody, did you not hear what I just said.

What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

A middle aged woman walks into a bar. Its Friday and there is a breeze in the air. She leaves shortly thereafter.

What happened after Will Ferrell took a dump? He wiped his ass and flushed.

Why did the muffin not eat the other muffin. Because muffins do not have a digestive system.

Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

how do you confuse a blonde do nothing

You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

One time, I saw this guy on stilts and thought it would be hilarious if someone pushed him over. Then some guy pushed him over and broke his neck.

What is a pedophile's favorite thing about twenty-six year olds? There are 20 of them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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