Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colorblind, I hate my life

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Why didn't the lttle boy fasten his seatbelt? It doesn't matter, it's too late now.

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A Black man, and Jewish man, and a Asian man walk into a bar. They then proceed to buy a drink, leave the bar, and move on with their day.

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why did so many people die in the typhoon in the Philippines because they had to finish there math homework

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What did one ginger say to the other? W are both gingers.

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who is gay wit mon james cornish

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What's worse than a wet sock? Being molested as a child.

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I Have a Black Friend

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A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

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Q: How do you make a plumber sad A: you kill his family lolololololololololol

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What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

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what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. ------ Knock Knock Whose there? Not Suzie

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what is purple and smells like poop? very weird looking poop

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Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

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Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Jimmy -thatcooltyguy

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What's big fat and hairy? Peter

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What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

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Q: Why shouldn't you walk under a ladder? A: Because it could fall on top of you. Be a reasonable human being and just fly OVER the ladder.

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If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

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Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

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Why was the black man picking cotton from the backyard? Because he enjoys gardening as a hobby, and prefers to do it every Sunday, after work.

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If a canoe is stuck in a tree with its headlights on, howmany pancakes does it take to cover the roof of my house? False, snakes don't have armpits!

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Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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