What did the banana say to the apple? We're fruity.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A successful, articulate, charming, well mannered, rich, young man walks into a bar.... Every night

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Roses are read, Violets are blue, I have aids, now so do you

thumb_up thumb_down -22

guess what what ...

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Whats 1+1? window!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A midget, a nun, and a kangaroo walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Don't count your eggs before you put them in a basket.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the airplane crash? The pilot had a stroke.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What is the crunchiest part of a Vegetable? It depends if by Vegetable you mean the food or the disabled human incapable of carrying out simple, daily tasks, in which case this joke would be referring to canibalism.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

one day a bear was eating for winter he ate about half what he had to and said "Im tired ill take a nap and eat the rest later. one month later he died of starvation

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the girl drop her sucker? she was hit by a truck!

thumb_up thumb_down -22

"Why did Jim Jones put cyanide in the People's Temple Flavor Aid?" Because he understood that adding sugar would be bad for their teeth.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q:why is steven balmont gonna beat up mr fatty goral A:because hes a fat czech Shout out to my mandem lewis hall&moses

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Knock Knock! Who's there? Dog Dog wh- wait how did you knock? *mindblown*

thumb_up thumb_down -22

a priest, a rabbi, and a nun walk into a bar...and the bartender goes...what is this a joke? mr. healey

thumb_up thumb_down -22

why dose micheal jackson like 29 year olds Because there is 20 of them

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Guy 1: So how did you get into hospital Guy 2: I was drinking near my computer Guy 1: So why did it explode? Guy 2: (Doesn't reply)

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Hey i just met you, and this us crazy! Heres some toilet paper, wipe my ass maybe?

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

So a bar walks into a man...

thumb_up thumb_down -24

why did the magician stop doing magic ? he got hit by a bus and died

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q:What's the difference between a lake? A: a tree, because motorcycles dont have doors... :) crf

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops