Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

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What the flower say to the bird. Nothing

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What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

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I walked into a Mcdonald's and ordered a Big Mac. I regretted it later.

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What do all homosexuals have in common? Not much.

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Wanna know what a hate about instructions? I always get my dick stuck in a ceiling fan.

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Why did the boy break his leg? Because he fell off a building

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Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

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Q: What's worse then 10 babies nailed to a tree? A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees

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Q. What is a deaf man's favorite song? A. Nothing, because he can not hear.

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How do you kill a baby? You take a gun and shoot it.

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don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!

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whats white a smells like paint. whtie paint.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him "why the long face?" "All horses have long faces" he replied.

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts.

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Q: Why was the old man sad? A: Because he has a quarter super glued to the bottom of his foot

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Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit! I can talk too!"

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What's the difference between a bowling ball and a sorority girl? You could always eat the bowling ball if you really had to.

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Micael Jackson enters a bar. Everyone screams, and then someone runs over and pulls the cheap mask off the impersonator's face. Michael Jackson IS DEAD, get over it

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What did the college student do during her Spring Break in Mexico? We're not sure, she never came back.

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Sally heard a scream in a dark room and went to go see who it was. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally...

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What's worse than the WNBA? The Cleveland Cavaliers.

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What's worse than Monkey Ball? Super Monkey Ball. What's worse than Super Monkey Ball? The Holocaust.

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Knock Knock! Whos There? Little boy blew! Little boy blew who? Micheal Jackson....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops