Q: Suzy loves apples, she will do anything to get her hands on an apple. Why didn't she eat Tom's apple? A: She ate someone elses apple and then he killed her before she could get to tom's!!!

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What do you call a seedless pumpkin? A pumpkin.

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so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Sex with helen keller.

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Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

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What's worse than finding a spider hidden in your sheets? The spiders being followers of the devil then sucking out your soul and giving it to the devil while your body gets stretched and you die a very painful death.

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How many asian children does it take for Gary Glitter to get aroused? Just one.

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Ok is 25 really funnier than 24 because i think 8008 or 5318008 are way funnire tahn 24 or 35 just saying

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What did the kid say to the ice-cream Man Can I have a duck please

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Comedian: Do you all wanna hear a joke? Audience: Yeah!!! Comedian: Okay! What did the bad comedian say to the audience? Audience: What?!! Comedian: Chicken butt. Thank you, you've been a great crowd. Good night!

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12 in general

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He died of alcohol poisoning that day

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What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

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Did you hear about the man with the bicycle? He was 2 tired.

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A Mexican guy, a black guy, and an ISIS member walk into a bar. The black and Mexican men, realizing the potential danger in the situation quickly exit the bar and alert the proper authorities. $

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A cheeseburger and fries walk into a bar. The bartender says "sorry, we don't serve lunch"

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you are looking on the internet someone falls over and i were shoes and chips prevent world war 2

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A blonde walks out of a hair salon She had just dyed her hair.

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Knock Knock -Who's there? No one -Ok

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A blonde, brunette, and red-head were on a deserted island. The blonde said, "in thirty years or so, we'll all have gray hair."

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L.A Clippers 2000-2012 season!!!!

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Knock Knock Who's there It's me open the door

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Why did the man throw the baby at the brick wall? I don't know, but that is a tragic incident and I will now go mourn.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to why did the bubble gum cross the road? it was on the chickens foot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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