"You just went and made a new dinosaur?" "And due to its well-developed core muscles the staff behind Jurassic World has called it - 'ABDOMINUS PEX'." "That's a stupid name."

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

What do you call a bear in the rain? A wet bear.

Why did James drop his ice-cream? He was mourning the loss of his mother to terminal illness so he threw himself in front of a train.

What do you call a black guy doing community service? Someone who wanted to give back. Stop being racist.

Why did the middle-aged lady have a heart attack? Years of heavy smoking, alcohol abuse and lack of exercise had taken its toll on her body, causing it to age prematurely. @JWest

What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

Cripples are lame.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?

Roses are red, Wait. Why start this poem when you cant finish it Refrigerator

Why was little Jimmy sad? Because his mum died.

What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? The incident happened to substantiate stereotypes and condone racism.

A horse walks into a butcher shop and asks for two apple pies. The butcher says "sorry, but we don't have apple pies. It's a butcher shop." And the horse says "nevermind, I came here on my bike."

What do you call a man sitting at the bar drinking alone? An alcoholic.

What did the milk bottle say to the other milk bottle? Nothing. Bottles can't talk you silly goose.

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, because they have turned to alcoholism because there is no God. GO COMMUNISM, BOO AMERICA.

The chickens have become self-aware!

a man was cooking a tortilla. what did he say when he dropped it while flipping the tortilla? oops i dropped my tortilla

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

Duncan walks into a bar and is greeted by his friends Eric and Tom. Duncan tells them that his wife left and took the kids. Duncan then goes home and hangs himself.

What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

Why did the man walk into the bar Because he was an acoholic

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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