Q. Why did the blonde die drinking milk? A. she was shot in the head by a 22.

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Why did the chicken cross the road To walk back

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Fred: Hey man where were you last night. Steve: Why don't yo ask yo mama.

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Why was the boy put on his socks? So he wouldn't get blisters.

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

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People are like trees. When hit multiple times with an ax they fall down.

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Q: If I have 5 pencils, and you have 3 spoons, how many pancakes will stick to the ceiling? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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give a man a blow job and he'll come for a second. teach a man to blow job and .... no that just doesn't work

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What did the teenage boy do when his mum was out shopping? Finish his homework.

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I've always hated people saying "last one there is a rotten egg" because don't you want to be a rotten egg so you don't get eaten?

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I walked into the cactus store. The clerk there was being mean so I called him a "prick". ...........

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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what did the man write down? nothing,because at that time, his pen was out of ink, so he had to open his dest drawer to get another one

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Red are roses Blue are violets Dyslexic am I.

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As I sat waiting for the doctor to return with my final prognosis, I began contemplating my own mortality. Looking inside myself, one question continued to haunt me: “What’s the X-ray technician going to do when he walks in and sees me messing with the equipment?”

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How do you know if an elephants been in your fridge? It's completely destroyed.

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why did the chicken cross the road? well... to get to the other side.

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yo mummas so FAT to get to the other side

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Why did the black guy die... Herpees he didn't practice safe sex

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What do you call a Koala bear that does not have a chin? A Koala bear.

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Ask me if I'm a cucumber. Are you a cucumber? No.

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What is yellow and white and goes 150 miles down a railroad track? a duck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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