Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars? No, we can't.

thumb_up thumb_down

what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

thumb_up thumb_down

So i know this guy... yes? thats it.

thumb_up thumb_down

A Palestinian woman asks a man for directions. She is promptly stoned to death.

thumb_up thumb_down

On Wednesday night, a drunk man was walking on the cliffs of dover. his funeral was saturday.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the Triceratops get for his birthday? Nothing. Dinosaurs are extinct.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A baby seal walks into a club. It is eventually beaten to death and eaten.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

In soviet Russia...things are different

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is small, red all over and gets shorter by the second? A baby cutting its hair with a potato peeler

thumb_up thumb_down -2

"What's black when clean, but white when dirty?" "A blackboard."

thumb_up thumb_down -2

An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man walks into a bar. Splash.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

roses are red, violets are blue, Hitler killed 6.6 million jews.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Does your iPod have zoom on it? Yeah, but it doesn't have a camera

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

You know what's funny with rape? Nothing. It's horror.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops