roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

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Why is the bowler right handed? He has no left hand.

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two men where hunting one man shot a deer and ate it, the other man shot the man who killed the deer and made human steaks. a day later he killed his family. and ate them with his dog. he then grabbed the deer that was left in his fridge and used it to make a fire.

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A bear walks into a bar. Everyone evacuates as animal control safely asses the situation.

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what did the fish say when i threw it at the wall. Ouch. Then the world ended because it caused a ripple in the fabric of reality.

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What's worst than the finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worst than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Finding seven dead babies in a trash can. What's worst than that? Finding one dead baby in seven trash cans.

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

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There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It had a heart attack. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

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Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

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how many flys in a box six --sticksack

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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whats awesome? a blade of grass with a mexican hat and a revolver.

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Q: What do you call a Jew in space? A: An astronaut you racist bastard!

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Why lets go Mets? Lets go Yankees!

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Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense, Refrigerator Sex

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Blind jokes are not funny! I just don't see the humor in them

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When does Adolf Hitler get horny? When his hormones start at it when looking at women.

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Your mother is so ugly that her physical appearance causes her to have a low self-esteem.

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How many dead babies can you fit inside Casey Anthony's trunk? Trick question. She didn't do it.

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What do Justin Bieber and corn have in common? They are both fruits. Except for the corn.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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