What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead." It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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Q: What would have been the easiest way to stop the second world war without killing anyone? A: Paid Hitler for his art.

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What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

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What do you call a man who burns his country's flag on it's independence day? Unpatriotic

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what's the worst lie in the universe? I swear to god that was my last piece of gum

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Why did jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms or legs Knock knock Who's there? Not jimmy

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What's windy and sunny at the same time? The weather.

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Your momma smells so bad that she purchased arm and hammer products to improve upon her natural scent.

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Q: Were yyoouu talking smack about me? A: what? Q: did i studder? A:yeah you said yyoouu Q: well were ya A: no Q: oh ok.. A: k bye..

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I am a dog.

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What did the jew say to hitler? SURPRISE!! IM YOUR NEW DADDY

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Everybody has a penis! EVERY BODY! WHY can't feminists admit this obvious anatomical fact? Gahhhh!

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Why do children go to school? Because they have to learn.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

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In Soviet Russia, the same thing that happens here, happens there.

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How do you kill a Jewish person? Like any other person, they are like any other person of any race and religion.

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what happens when you try to believe it's not butter? 34 Indonesian kids lose their job.

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do you have snow in your vagina? because i am going to plow you

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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Why did the math student refuse to do his geometry homework? Straight lines do not exist, so there is no real world application to any geometric shape.

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OK, Billy went to his friend Fred in the tree. And then went inside to get a snack. Then Fred fell out of the Tree and.....landed on a comfy mattress.

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What did Batman say when he saw Robin? Hey look it's Robin

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Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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