A man walks into a bar with a frown on his face His dog just died

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hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because grass don't eat meat.

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What is the worst gift a child can get? a gift

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what is the differnce between my truck and chuck norris? i eat my own poop.

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What's the difference between a Gay Man and a Straight Woman? Anatomy.

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Why did it take a long time to read the anti-joke? Because of the great amount of space between the question and the answer.

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Why did the Alzheimer's patient fail the history exam? I don't remember.....

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Rylan Clark

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What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle.

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What did the facial stylist charge Jack Sparrow to get his ears pierced? A buc-an-ear!

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Yo momma so fat, when she steps on the scales it reads 90kg

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Slowly being tortured to death.

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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Knock Knock Who's there? Mormens...

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What type of pants do Mario and Luigi wear? Levi or Denim, I'm not sure why but probably because you can get a nice fitting pair for only a couple of bucks.

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Malcom: Knock Knock. Jessica: Who's there? Malcom: It's Malcom. Jessica: Okay. Come in.

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The Pope walks into a bar, the barman says: "What'll it be, Pope?" But the Pope's knowledge of English is tenuous at best. He mumbles something in Latin that the barman doesn't understand. The Pope becomes frustrated and leaves.

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What do you call an old lady walking down the street? Widowed.

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You need to trim these evergreens. Either they are getting low our my van is GROWING!

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How do you kill a baby? You don't muder is a sin and against the law

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too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

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your mother eats so many chocolates and sugary confectionary that i would recommend a check up the the dentist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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