Jesus walks on water, Humans are 70% water, I can walk on humans, Therefore i am 70% Jesus.

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Its not a big mistake at all, if people do not want to get hypnotized you cant hypnotize them, or so I thought...

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Why did Jack like oranges? - Penis

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana Yoshimoto. A popular Japanese author of the book, Kitchen. She is incredibly talented and it would be a great honor to have her in your house, so you should open your door.

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Why did little Annie fall off the swing? Cause her penis was too heavy.

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How much does Michael Vick love his dogs? More than Casey Anthony loved her daughter.

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Did you hear about the blonde that crashed her car? No. Is she okay?

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How do you make Jacob cry? Take away his xbox

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I haven't been this tired since the last time I was tired

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Carlos was on the computer writing anti-jokes. They all scuked.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A= Were both lawyers! What happens every sixty seconds in the us? A= a minute passes!

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Why did the guy run out of the whorehouse? Because when she spread her legs it looked like she was pulling apart a grilled ham and cheese sandwich.

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What do you call it when a black guy is talking to a white guy? A conversation.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

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My grandfather slipped on a banana peel. I helped him up.

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

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A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim are on a plane to France. When they arrive in Paris one will go visit a friend who recently found inspiration in the many magical streets of the city and is in the middle of a year abroad. Another will search for a job and home to support himself and any future family that he might choose to have in the future. The last will check into a hotel and proceed to have a wonderful time seeing all the sights that Paris has to offer.

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What do you call white people on a bench? NBA What do you call black people on a bench? RTA

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why did scooba steeve loose his flippers? because his head imploded after reaching an extremley high pressure point at the bottom of the ocean. unable to live, his memory was a bit less persistant.

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Your mom is such a big whore that she sleeps with your dad.

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What do you call a fish with no "i's"? A blind fish.

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Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

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Why are black people like jelly beans? Nobody likes the black ones

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One day there was 2 black guys in hoodys with knives in there hand. They tapped me on the shoulder and took my groceries. They then made me a jam sandwich and went on there way

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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