What did they do with the drunken sailor? Gave him the sack, which meant he could no longer provide for his family.

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I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

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A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

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Why is is afraid of seven? Because seven is a date rapist

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I recently found out I have aids just kiddin heres the real joke... I recenly found out that Philidelphia means "City of Brotherly Love" and I said so do people in philly say its always free hug day in Phillipd fun house in philly?

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why does it take 2 woman with p.m.t to change a light bulb? because there both tired , feel bloated , and could do with a bar of choccy

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how do you remove a black man from a car? Wash the bumper

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: Someone who just got stabbed to death reading the newspaper.

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What did the computer say to the mouse? Nothing inanimate objects cant talk

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what is your moms favorite website? Wait did I say mom. Oh I'm not very sorry.

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How do you find a jew amoung italians? Through a dollar and see which one whines its not enough!

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what's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a trampoline? obviously quite a lot due to the fact that they are two completely different ideas with little to no relation to each other.

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How did 3 fat women fit under 1 small umbrella and not get wet? It wasn't raining!

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Q.How many blonds does it take to change a light bulb? A.1

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How do you make a Dead Baby Float..... ......With 3 scoops of ice cream and 1 cup of liquid stem cells.

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What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

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what did I say to myself nothing because its very weird to talk to your self

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There is my brain said the English man stop leaving it in the fridge and let me mug you now get in the car OK!

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Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

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Why do women wear perfume and makeup? They smell bad and they're ugly.

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Whats a never ending Opium for the stupid, mentally depraved un educated population? Christianity

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David walks into a bar. Someone shoots him. Now hes dead.

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Your mom is so nce that when you got into college she taught you to be more independent so you could succeed later in life.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A catfish could never pass the LSAT because it is unable to perform high-level critical thinking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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