What did the disrespectful cow say to his parents? Mooo. I hate you both

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was a turkey, idiot.

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How did Richard the lion heart get his name? From his parents.

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What's big, black, and just knocked an 8 year old girl off of her bike? The refrigerator I just threw at her. (not all are white you know)

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What did the teenage boy do when his mum was out shopping? Finish his homework.

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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Q: Whats better than not being a Jew? A: Being a Jew.

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What do you call a one legged , one eyed, canadian fisherman called Samuel Browning? Mr Browning unless you are on friendly terms then Sam is fine.

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People are like trees. When hit multiple times with an ax they fall down.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the street? A: Because that was the direction it was headed.

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why did the blonde put on a coat? because she was cold.

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if your having girl problems i feel bad for you son, i don't have any.

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Why was blueberry flavoured bubblegum cancelled? Because it tasted like soup.

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Two antennas falls in love. They get married. The wedding was horrible, but the reception was great.

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What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

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Doctor: Knock knock. Patient: Whose there? Doctor: Interrupting doctor. Patient: Interrupting doc... Doctor: Your son has AIDS and will die soon.

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what did the teacher say to the students when she was talking about the solar system The sun is very hot. At the core it is 15 million degrees Celsius or 27 million degrees Farenheit. Using a magnifying glass, we can see the very hot heat and the light of the sun. Please do not do that because it can hurt your eyes. This makes the light very bright and the heat is so hot it could start a fire.

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Here isa poem from a dog Roses are gray violets are a different shade of gray Let's go chase cars

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue Did you think I'd actually cry over you? I said I loved you You believed it was true Well guess what baby You just got played too! ??????

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Q: How could the black man afford to buy a TV? A: He had a well-paying job and a supporting family.

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Whats better than throwing a baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitchfork. Whats better than catching a baby with a pitchfork? Eating it afterwords.

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Haiku's aren't real poems. No body understands them. My soul is burned toast.

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HEY YOU! TISSUE!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops