A duck walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender doesn't understand him because he doesn't speak duck and promptly calls animal control to have the duck removed.

Who's obsessed with death and love to make jokes about it? The majority of the contributors in this site.

What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

Horse walks into a bar. 'The barman says 'why the long face?' The horse says 'I've got cancer'.

did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

guess what? bannanas

Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

Two peanuts were walking down the street..........pepper.

Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

What happens when you throw a red rock into a blue ocean. The rock gets wet.

A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

Your mother is so fat that she is considered morbidly obese. In fact, she should seriously consider a weight loss diet to reduce her risk of heart disease and diabetes.

why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

A man walks into a bar. It leads to a fight that is enjoyable to watch.

What day is it today? Today. Thank you. You're welcome.

Why was a black man in a prison cell? He was a highly respected plumber fixing a prisoner's faulty toilet.

how do you confuse a blonde do nothing

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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