why did the fat woman die? ... because she tried to commit suicide and the ceiling collapsed on her.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane act

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Q:What did the midget say to the toll booth operator? A: Is your family dead too?

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a lollipop? 782

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A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

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Why did blonde drown? As a child a child she never learned to swim since she did not enjoy swimming.

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Q: What should you do when life gives you lemons? A: Life would never really give you lemons...

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anti-joke.ru - russian style

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A child walks into a bar. I swear those jungle gyms are too short.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

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whats the strongest muscle the man who can't talk has. definatly not his mouth

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What do you call a black man with a knife and red liquid on his hands? A chef who accidently spilled strawberry jam on himself.

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Why did the Iraqi cross the road? Because he was hired by the CIA as an undercover operative to lead them to a highly dangerous target in the small town of Aziziyah and was leaving the area to avoid the impending Pavelow strike on the town center.

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A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar. A good time was had by all, until closing time.

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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wanna hear a cat joke? just kitten

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What do you call a dog that has no legs? It doesn't matter because he will never come.

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Roses are red violets are blue. I'm falling in love with you.

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Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

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How many blond girls does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, it is a faily simple task

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Why couldn't the woman give her sister a present? Because she just got eaten by zombies.

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What did the shit covered people licking each others scrotums call themselves? The Aristocrats

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Q. Why did the blonde die drinking milk? A. she was shot in the head by a 22.

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civil rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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