roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

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I found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school. I said, "Wow, I can't believe I just found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school." Later that day, my principal gassed the kindergarten classrooms with cyanide while shouting, "GO RAIDERS!"

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Justing Bieber walks in a bar. Everyone shoots him.

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What do Barney and a butchers knife have in common? One of them is purple

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Ask me if I'm a tree "are you a tree?" No

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A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. The Black woman said, "Oh, den I uses the middle names."

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So a Jew is walking on the street and he sees a penny, and he decides to pick it up because ever since the fire that killed his family and burned his house down he has been living on the street and he needs all the help he can get.

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A blonde walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What're you drinking?" The blonde says, "Nothing yet. That's why I'm in a bar. But your lack of basic observation skills is disturbing."

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A lesbian and a gay both lie about there gender on eharmony, trying to get a date with someone there own gender. By coincedene, they get matched and go on a date, and both of them realize how weird this situation is and go home.

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A man walks into a bar. He gets drunk, goes home, and beats his wife and kids.

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Jimmy Saville

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he's not gonna come

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Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

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Yo mama's so fat that when she goes into a clothing store, she often feels self-conscious about having to buy larger than average clothing sizes than most people.

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What did Elmer Fudd say when Bugs Bunny got away again? "Oh, dat dawn wabbit, I'ww get it some day".

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How do you starve a black man? You slowly emasculate him over 400 years through a system designed solely for the benefit of whites, and subsequently he is malnourished.

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rose's are red violets are blue I have touretts blblblblblblblblbbl

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Light turned green, indicating that it was a safe and appropriate time to cross

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Roses are red , Violets are blue You little dumb ass bitch Ain't fuckin' with yoouuuuuu

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What's the difference between a black person and a park bench? Benches are inanimate objects while people are indeed carbon-based life forms.

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When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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What is the worst joke ever? This one.

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whats worse than getting lost in europe? becoming the middle in the human centipede.

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what does the doctor do when he tells you you have aids? he laughs and says "hahahahahhaha sucks for you, i dont!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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