If 2 wrongs make a right and 2 rights make a wrong, then when you have 4 rights=2 wrongs, you have a true statement. If you have 8 rights = 4 wrongs, you have a verified statement.

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Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

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A fat man walks into a gym, and comes out fatter

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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What did the dog say to the mailman? Woof.

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Two Chav's jump off a cliff who wins? Neither, the affects of gravity are equal despite the weight of said object.

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what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

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What's invisible? A lot of stuff.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

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Whats funnier than a guy in a wheelchair? A guy on the floor squirming to get back in his wheelchair.

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knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

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THIS ONE TIME MY DOG ATE A WHOLE CHEESECAKE

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? Because it was summer and the grass had extensive growth, so much so, that it proceeded to spread to his neighbors yard. His neighbor then called HOA, and thus, the unruly grass was taken care of.

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What's scarier than a ghost? Practically anything as ghosts aren't real.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Nobody, this is a metaphorical door..

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Whats hard and long and used to penetrate women? A hypodermic needle.

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whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

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Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

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a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

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whats worse than getting eaten by a bear a bear getting eaten by a squirrel who ate you too.

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Roses are red, Violates are blue. I have an erection, and its lasted more then three hours

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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