A blonde walks out of a hair salon She had just dyed her hair.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Gestapo

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What is a good remedy for the common cold? A piping hot bowl of chicken-noodle soup.

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Why was the chubby bird that you were staring at you angry. Because you were looking at him.

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Why was the man's foot hurting? Because he was being fed into a wood chipper

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What do you do to vegetables to make them taste good? Nothing. They are still people, and they can't speak up for themselves.

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Whats worse than 20 dead babies in a garbage can? A: The smell

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is both deaf and blind. Driving would be an extremely hazardous action for herself and other nearby drivers.

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KNOK KNOK WHOES THERE APPLE APPLE WHO SEE THIS IS Y U BROKE UP

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you got Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, and Reese Witherspoon. Which do you think is more succesful

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Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

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Why was the walrus wearing braces? It wasn't, because it his highly unlikely that people would care about a walrus's dental issues. The walrus would most likely cope with his irregular teeth and move on with its life.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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A man asks his wife to make him a sandwich, she proceeds to make a sandwich using rye bread, lettuce, two slices of tomatoes, a variety condiments, mustard and several slices of American cheese. The man eats the sandwich at a parade with his wife celebrating Woman's Rights.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No one knows because humans do not have the capability of accessing the chickens brain to receive their knowledge and what they were thinking about in the past.

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why did the chicken cross the road? becuase he wanted to walk and the road was the only available place to do so

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Knock, knock who's there? Not your Dad, because he left and created a better family.

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A man walks into a bar, buys a pint of beer, talks to his friends for while and leaves.

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What did Chuck Testa do when he saw she had died of a heart attack? He cried and gave her a proper funeral and burial.

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What do you do if you see a Mexican riding a bike? Say "Hello." It is polite.

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender suddenly runs out the door frantically yelling, "He's got a gun! He's got a gun!" Meanwhile, inside the bar, the patrons overpowered the gunman, tied him up and took his weapon and all the cash he had. They later used his money to buy more drinks at another bar.

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A child wasn't wearing knee pads when he was skateboarding. He proceeded to fall of his board and break his arm

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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