Q: Why should you never let Jerry Sandusky babysit your children? A: Because, in November of 2011, Sandusky was arrested and charged with 40 counts of sexual abuse of young boys over a 15-year period. A man with this type of background does not seem like a an ideal choice for a babysitter.

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Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

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Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street..........pepper.

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Horse walks into a bar. 'The barman says 'why the long face?' The horse says 'I've got cancer'.

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What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

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did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

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Whats funnier than 1 dead baby? 2 Dead babies

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

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Your mother is so fat that she is considered morbidly obese. In fact, she should seriously consider a weight loss diet to reduce her risk of heart disease and diabetes.

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A man walks into a bar. It leads to a fight that is enjoyable to watch.

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A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

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Why did the toddler fall over? He's an Iraqi child and has been shot in both legs, being readied for a public execution for fighting on the opposing side.

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- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

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What day is it today? Today. Thank you. You're welcome.

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how do you confuse a blonde do nothing

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Why was a black man in a prison cell? He was a highly respected plumber fixing a prisoner's faulty toilet.

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Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

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Why didn't the black man sit in the front of the bus Because he lives in a society where it is illegal and socially unacceptable for a person of African decent to sit in towards the front of the bus, near the driver, which is most commonly reserved for a person of European decent.

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Why was the little Asian boy crying at the county fair? He had just watched his entire family get brutally crushed beneath the weight of the old ferris wheel as they went to get on. Never would he forget the painful screams of his mother as her blood splashed onto his white t-shirt. Never would he forget the police car ride to the foster home when it all sank in that they were truly gone. And never would he forget the abuse his new parents would inflict on him daily. But what would forever torment him most were those screams. Those persistent screams that woke him in the night until the day he died many, many years later.

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how much blondes does it take to fix a light bulb 1 to buy the bulb 2 to put it up and 25 to think about what it does

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Little molly says she wants to have a baby when she grows up because her little baby brother died of ta-sacs 6 months after birth.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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