Hey you must be a parking ticket, because your yellow.

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What's hot and cold at the same time? Hotcold.

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hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

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How did the Mexican cross the border? He couldn't he didn't have legs

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Q. Why did the blonde die drinking milk? A. she was shot in the head by a 22.

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Q: Why were minorities denied access to the bathroom? A: It was for employees only.

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Q: What's the upside to your otherwise miserable life? A: You only got raped twice last week.

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-Your mom worked as a prostitute and died a virgin.

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How do you kill someone? Shoot them. How do you kill someone with a knife? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a car? Shoot them How do you kill someone in a jet? Put the gun in the propeller

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One morning a guilty man reluctantly told his wife he was having an affair. After a long awkward silence they were then abducted by aliens.

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What was a hard time for people? the great depression

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What's brown and smells like shit? My boxers.

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Life is like a box of chocolates. Except it's not usually a rectangular or love heart shaped... nor does it contain small expensive assorted candy... life may not also contain nuts... or be devoured by our fellow human... Life is not like a box of chocolates

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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A rabi a priest and a gay guy are praying. The rabi says amen the priest says amen the gay guy says ahh men.

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What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

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What did the home-less man eat for dinner last night? Nothing.

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The Israeli asked the Japanese guy to open his eyes The Japanese guy said, I'm not squinting you crazy Jew. You're the one that sold me these cheap glasses.

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What did one fetus say to they other fetus? Nothing they were aborted.

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whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? babies aren't fruit.

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A penis walks into a bar..

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Q: How do you know what will happen when the world willl end? A: by experience

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Why did jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms or legs Knock knock Who's there? Not jimmy

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How do you learn how to drive? You get in the driver seat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops