If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

how do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The fridge is on its side, the door is torn off, and the ruined food scattered all over the floor. Not to mention there is an elephant in your kitchen.

Why was the black man hanging from the tree? He fell and had to grab a branch.

A praying mantis is very graceful

Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

what did the leprosy survivor get for christmas a amputation

Do they censor Ass? TESTING TESTING ASS ASS ASS

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was playing tic-tac-toe with a friend.

Why Johnny's parents threw out his broken bike? - ´Cause Johnny got ran over by a drunken driver yesterday, when he was cycling back home from school.

Q. what tall and looks like a jew? A.TODD

Why did God create Ebola? Because he hates us all.

why dose micheal jackson like 29 year olds Because there is 20 of them

a priest, a rabbi, and a nun walk into a bar...and the bartender goes...what is this a joke? mr. healey

Guy 1: So how did you get into hospital Guy 2: I was drinking near my computer Guy 1: So why did it explode? Guy 2: (Doesn't reply)

Knock Knock! Who's there? Dog Dog wh- wait how did you knock? *mindblown*

What happens when a man farts a fancy memorial party in a ball room in England... At least 1000 people die somewhere on earth in the time his butt squeezed out that fart. And I'm sure someone gets raped.

"Why did Jim Jones put cyanide in the People's Temple Flavor Aid?" Because he understood that adding sugar would be bad for their teeth.

Why did the girl drop her sucker? she was hit by a truck!

Q:why is steven balmont gonna beat up mr fatty goral A:because hes a fat czech Shout out to my mandem lewis hall&moses

one day a bear was eating for winter he ate about half what he had to and said "Im tired ill take a nap and eat the rest later. one month later he died of starvation

What is the crunchiest part of a Vegetable? It depends if by Vegetable you mean the food or the disabled human incapable of carrying out simple, daily tasks, in which case this joke would be referring to canibalism.

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

Why did the airplane crash? The pilot had a stroke.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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