A platypus walks into a bar. Why is there a butter knife in my basement?

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Q: Do you know how to save a black man from drowning? A: No. GOOD!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was late for its laser bypass surgery.

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Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease

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question: why did the dog whine? answer: Because it wanted the freakin bone

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If a red house has red bricks, and a yellow house has yellow bricks, what colour of bricks does a greenhouse have? Greenhouses are made of glass.

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Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

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Whats a never ending Opium for the stupid, mentally depraved un educated population? Christianity

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american idol

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How can you tell the difference between a cow? One says moo

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what do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? last years hide and go seek champion

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Slavery.

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Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

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What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

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You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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What did the boy with four arms get for Christmas? A Laptop. Why couldn't he use it? He had no fingers.

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My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

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What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with a live one crawling out.

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Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

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A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

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Whats black and blue and red all over? An infant after its been beaten with a bat.

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What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops