A middle aged woman walks into a bar. Its Friday and there is a breeze in the air. She leaves shortly thereafter.

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Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

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Why did the muffin not eat the other muffin. Because muffins do not have a digestive system.

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You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

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One time, I saw this guy on stilts and thought it would be hilarious if someone pushed him over. Then some guy pushed him over and broke his neck.

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What is a pedophile's favorite thing about twenty-six year olds? There are 20 of them.

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A. why'd the chicken cross the road? B.a dog got hit by a bus.

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how do you confuse a blonde do nothing

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There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

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why did the man beat his wife? why not?

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

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An overweight man is at a gym. he is trying to lose weight because he feels uncomfortable with his size.

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Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist bastard.

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WHATS A GREAT RAVE TUNE KANE !!!!! TUCKER !!!!!!!! DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

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Little molly says she wants to have a baby when she grows up because her little baby brother died of ta-sacs 6 months after birth.

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How to make deep fried chicken. Step 1: Go to your local swimming pool. Step 2: Throw a dead chicken into the deep end. Step 3: Strike the chicken with lightning. Step 4: Remove your newly fried chicken. Enjoy!

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69.

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Why was Luke named Luke Skywalker? Because he walks to skies.

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Whats worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple...

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head and dies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops