Who let the dogs out? The dog's owner.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did Anne Frank say to the German Officer? Nothing. She had to keep quiet in a cramp attic in order to survive.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. The Black woman said, "Oh, den I uses the middle names."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's worse than finding a dead baby in a dumpster? Recognizing the baby as your missing child, and finding the corpse of your dead wife next to it.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the man steal the little girl? He didn't. She was his daughter and they were driving home after picking up the groceries.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What is frowned upon no matter what country you're in? Sex on a plane.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what does a buttler put in a closet ? stuff.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

a person who will soon die of beeties

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man walks into a bar. and buys a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the Mexican jump the fence? He was at his neighbors house and it was shorter to cut through yards than to walk to his house

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How can a black person and a white person be friends? The civil right's movement.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what did i get my mom for her birthday? Nothing im selfish

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down

human centipede

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the bird.

thumb_up thumb_down

Violets are blue and/or violet Roses are red so's my blood, see?

thumb_up thumb_down

A blonde takes a test. She scores higher than her Asian friend.

thumb_up thumb_down

What song does the lady camel sing to seduce male camels - my humps my humps my humps my humps How did sergay the camel respond? -we dont know. He died a fatal death involving hippos in hula skirts, and flying guavas

thumb_up thumb_down

Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? Niether did she

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops