Q. What do you get if you cross a suspicious person with a paranoid person? A. Who wants to know

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what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

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what does STFU stand for? the southern tenant farmers union.

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what is the best part about sleeping with twenty six year olds? they are usually very experienced in sexual intercourse so there isn't much awkwardness

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Knock, knock. Come in.

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Why? Because.

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There is an American, a Mexican, and a Muslim on a plane They give the American the 1 parachute and the Mexican and the north koreon explode

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens rights ;) Wanna hear another joke? Too bad i'm not gonna tell you

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I'd like to advertise the love of Jesus in Kobane. Do u join me next Monday? :D

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why was the fat man excercizing? because he was a fatass and no one liked him

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The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!" Doctor replies, "You've got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient. "You've also got Alzheimer's Disease." Looking relieved the patient says, 'at least it shall be over quickly.'

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hello i hav a growing interes in math and arithmetic especially when it involves pi if u are still reading this you either didnt realize that this was a joke or just didnt care but most likely it means that the first line interested or bored u and u wanted to find out wut the rest was u like????

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Q: What does a really poor kid say to his friends? A: I hate over working for 75 cents an hour...

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Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

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How many apples does it take to keep the doctor away? 1 if you throw it hard enough! haha

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Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

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Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

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How do you find a jew amoung italians? Through a dollar and see which one whines its not enough!

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? You're mom. It's your.

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This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well shit whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

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Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

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A blind man walks into a bar. He had a few drinks then went home.

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why does it take 2 woman with p.m.t to change a light bulb? because there both tired , feel bloated , and could do with a bar of choccy

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Knock Knock Who's There No-one your not very popular

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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