Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

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Why did the car go down the road? Someone was driving it. Why did the car stop? Because he suddenly fell and had a stroke.

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Roses are Red Violets or Red Trees are Red HOLY SH*T MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was heading to the funeral house to mourn his dead family.

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Whats dark, has an opening, and guys like to go into it? A Vagina

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How do you get 50 Babies into a phone booth? A blender How do you get them out? Doritos

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Sally has no arms. A: Knock kock? B: Whose there? Not Sally.

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What did your mom get for christmas ? A stairstepper.

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What has two legs but can't walk A paraplegic

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

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How many electricians with a suitable ladder does it take to change a bulb? If the bulb fitting is now obsolete it may not be possible.

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Why was the boy put on his socks? So he wouldn't get blisters.

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What did the little boy say to Micheal Jackson? Shouldn't you be dead?

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whats worse than sitting next to jack grindey nothing

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What happens when you put four drunk clowns and eight sober clowns inside of a clown car? Nothing, because the clowns realized that it's dangerous to operate a vehicle while under the influence of alcohol and decides to call a taxi instead.

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My Japanese girlfriend dumped me today...Oh well, theres plenty more in the sea

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Names.

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why did the snow man die? Actually it is impossible because it was an inanimate object.

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As I sat waiting for the doctor to return with my final prognosis, I began contemplating my own mortality. Looking inside myself, one question continued to haunt me: “What’s the X-ray technician going to do when he walks in and sees me messing with the equipment?”

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What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

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If it looks like grass, smells like grass, and tastes like grass... Then you were honestly misled when ordering that salad.

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If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

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What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops