Why did the black man commit suicide last tuesday? he was just fired from his job, his sister passed away, and he became depressed

What did the zen master say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything,

why did the chicken cross the road? because he frickin wanted to!!!!!!

What's the difference between a duck and a popsicle? I don't shit on hamsters.

Why did the chicken cross the road. grass was greener on the other side!

What did the Po-Po do to the speeding Mexican? Gave him a ticket.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs.

A apple is red a banana is to never mind that joke sucks

:Knock Knock :Who's there? :....... No one was there because they were ding dong ditchers.

Why did the black man cross the road? To escape from his owner.

How do you confuse a bar tender? You ask him how tender he is.

Your mother is so fat, she appeals to my secret fetish.

jimmy walked into a bar, then walked out crying and all desperate seeing his wife cheating on him with another guy sitting in the bar. he jumped in front of a bus and was taken to the hospital. He died due serious injuries. Turns out that it wasn't his wife but her twin sister that neither jimmy nor his wife was aware of her existence.

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

A polish guy Is sick of being made fun of for his ethnicity, so he decides that he is going to act Italian thinking that no one makes fun of Italians. He stays home for weeks to practice this and one day walks out, up to a store and says"eh, get me some lasagna and zucchini !" the man at the store asks if he's polish.

Hey i just met you, and this us crazy! Heres some toilet paper, wipe my ass maybe?

What is black and blue and red all over? My wife.

Run, Run, As fast as you can, You can't catch me, I'm in a car.

Why does the man have mayonaise in his pants? A: I don't know, I was hoping you could tell me.

Why did Prius driver go to jail? Because he ran over someone and then fled the scene of the crime (at 11 mph)

What does aaron eat for dinner Answer- Fat Finger HAHAHAHAHA

Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. I slipped you a roofie, get ready for me.

Q: What do you say when you see your T.V. floating at night? A: That's so frickin awesome

What? I didn't say anything. Yes you did.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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