A black man bites into a watermelon. Just kidding he was white.

How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

Knock knock Who's there? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

Knock knock: Who's there: Woo: Woo Who: I knew you'd be glad to see me.

Why was the boy sad? He was harassed by his mum who died in the 1800's and went into a depressive state in which he drove himself to death using a pair of pliers and a rechargeable battery. No, he really just stubbed his toe.

Did you hear about the new brand of shovel? Yeah, it's pretty groundbreaking.

Wanna hear the most repeated joke on anti jokes? Why did [insert name here] fall off the swing? Because he/she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not [insert name here].

What does it say on the back of Superman`s cape on the "new" movie? My other actor was an awesome dude, all I got now is this asshole... Moral: Christopher Reeve... takes lasers... shotguns, eats lava with his cornflakes... falls of a horse... dies... Moral2: HEY What is the booing for? This is the ANTI JOKE! SECTION... but now to my sincerest thoughts... Moral 3: R.I.P Christohper Reeve, he lived and died with hope... Dying happy while suffering from one of the worst things that can happen to a human being, is an inspiration to us all! True superman!

did you hear the one about the gay child molester?

Calling your penis a chose because it's small and fat.

Q: What's worse than burning your tongue on hot chocolate. A: Getting shanked by a homeless man

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

There was an old lady who swallowed a fly. But everything turned out alright, as the fly was dissolved by stomach acid.

Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Why did the duck cross the road? I don't know. I only know why the chicken crossed the road.

Why did Susie drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

Did you hear the joke about the man and the serial killer? Neither did the man since he was stabbed repeatedly and thrown into the bottom of a lake.

What did the Catholic Priest say to Chris Hanson? Nothing. He attempted to flea, and was quickly taken down by law enforcement. He was then detained and processed and charged with Intent to commit statutory rape with a minor under the age of 14. He's still awaiting trial.

A black guy and a Mexican are sitting in a car who's driving??? The Cops

What do you call a fat guy? A fata*s mothaf*cka

Yo momma's so fat, that she got baptised in Sea World.

In soviet russia, child molests you! Unfortunately true

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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