How did Debbie get a black eye? Because her dad asked her to take off her pants and she refused so he beat her

A man drinks a java while using Java His java was hot, making him spill on his laptop Blue screen of death

What can never be seen by the owner, looks like Jesses mom, and smeels like shit. Jesses dick.

Q: What do you call a stop sign in the winter? A: A stop sign in the winter.

Did you know that if you took all the elephants on earth and lined them up in space, that all the elephants would die???

Why did the chicken cross the road? No one knows because humans do not have the capability of accessing the chickens brain to receive their knowledge and what they were thinking about in the past.

Why couldn't Cait walk her dog? She's been paralyzed from the waist down since she was 5 after her and her parents got into a car accident and her parents died.

A man asks his wife to make him a sandwich, she proceeds to make a sandwich using rye bread, lettuce, two slices of tomatoes, a variety condiments, mustard and several slices of American cheese. The man eats the sandwich at a parade with his wife celebrating Woman's Rights.

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer

1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I've got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.

Why did the boy get hit by a bus? HE didn't. He watched where he was going.

What's worst than the finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worst than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Finding seven dead babies in a trash can. What's worst than that? Finding one dead baby in seven trash cans.

Q: Why does the man smell so bad? A: He doesn't shower

How did the black guy get knocked out? He was hit by a fridge.

what has fore legs and cant fly a cat you idiot

why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to why did the bubble gum cross the road? it was on the chickens foot

Who's a tool and a NARC? Josh Brami!

What color is the orange? Grey, I'm color blind.

Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear, fuzzy wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy had no hair because he had cancer and died 3 weeks later.

Q: What do you call a innocent black man that was shot 403 times by the cops when they asked for his ID and somehow assumed he was gonna reach for a gun? A: Deceased Texan.

What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? The sandwich is hidden under the couch, and is non-migratory.

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom.

Why did the Mexican cross the border? He wanted to live a better life in pursuit of freedom and a better job.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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