How did the baby survive the car accident? He didn't. He was killed on impact.

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A man walks into a bar a bartender says, 'why the long face'? the man says 'I just walked into a bar'!!!

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Why did the chiken cross the road? It didn't, J-walking is against the law.

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my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

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why did Timmy fall off the the slide? he was hit by a plane why was Jimmy laughing? he watched Timmy get hit by the plane

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I see London, I see France. Wow! This high-speed train that travels across Europe is amazing!

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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Disreguard Females Aquire Currency

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Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

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Why did the McCann's parent's leave the window's and doors open? Because Portugal is a very hot climate, And they expected the place they were staying to be safe as lot's of tourist's stay there throughout the year.

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Whats included in over 90% of all car crashes? A Car

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Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

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Hamsters are a lot like cigarettes. They're completely harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.

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Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

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You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

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How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

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What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

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Why do midgets laugh when they run? The grass tickles their balls.

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What is worse than an 11 year old getting raped You getting caught

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What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. wow i missed the entire purpose of this.

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What did the caterpillar say to the robot? Nothing. Caterpillars do not have vocal chords and there are not, as yet, any truly portable robots capable of comprehending speech so to speak to one would be pointless.

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Q: What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: The pizza does not scream in the oven.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops