A lesbian and a gay both lie about there gender on eharmony, trying to get a date with someone there own gender. By coincedene, they get matched and go on a date, and both of them realize how weird this situation is and go home.

two scientists line up a frog at a line and tell it to jump it jumps 4 feet they cut off one front leg and tell it to jump it jumps 4 feet they cut off the other front leg and tell it to jump it jumps 4 feet they cut off a rear leg and tell it to jump it jumps 2 feet they cut off its last leg and tell it to jump it doesn't move they tell it to jump again it doesn't move the scientists come to a conclusion: frogs with no legs...cant hear

On Wednesday night, a drunk man was walking on the cliffs of dover. his funeral was saturday.

wife: why are women's feet smaller husband: so they can stand closer to the kitchen sink

What song does the lady camel sing to seduce male camels - my humps my humps my humps my humps How did sergay the camel respond? -we dont know. He died a fatal death involving hippos in hula skirts, and flying guavas

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

What's the difference between 10 dead baby's and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

What do you call someone who is bad at hand eye co-ordination? Dispraxic

What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

Duncan walks into a bar and is greeted by his friends Eric and Tom. Duncan tells them that his wife left and took the kids. Duncan then goes home and hangs himself.

What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars? No, we can't.

How do you keep children off your lawn? Touch them.

Stephen Hawking is so paranoid, always looking over his shoulder.

Chuck Norris was in a staring contest with the sun. He's blind now.

3 Men walk into a bar, they all order up a drink. And then they paid their tabs and left.

Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

What's worse than stapling a baby to a tree? Stapling the same baby to ten trees.

Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

what do u call a black guy who sells drugs a pharmacist

Aids, Black People, Cancer, Death, Retarded, Drunk, Sex, Black People, Holocaust, Blackies, White People, BLACK

Why did the tomato blush? It didn't, tomatoes are naturally red by colour.

Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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