I never made a mistake. I thought i did once but i was mistaken

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A gay man watches football.

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You arrive in the middle east. What is the first thing that you want to do? Leave

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Roses are stools, Violets are bums, sugar is knit, thank you, LSD.

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What do you call an Asian who can't drive? Underage, and therefore has not required his license to do so.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No neither has he.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

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You know what's funny with rape? Nothing. It's horror.

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Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

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What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

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What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

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how many flys in a box six --sticksack

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

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Q: So I don't get it. Do women actually like not having penises and testicles? Do they genuinely enjoy it? A: Silly boy. Women ADORE not having penises and testicles. You just can't get your mind around someone having different preferences in anatomy than you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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how do you make a plumber cry? pull up his pants....

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What's worst than the finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worst than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Finding seven dead babies in a trash can. What's worst than that? Finding one dead baby in seven trash cans.

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What happened when barba opened the coca cola? The cap flew off and hit the fence then the train then the moon then the pillow then the sun then the pole and the pole fell and hit the baseball and the cap landed on the floor... Then my turtle died

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So two men were drinking beer and one asks "Why are you so sad today, Lenny?" The other man replies "Because I was just diagnosed leukemia." Four days later Lenny dies and his body was buried at Cherryhill Cemetery where his family mourned over his death.

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What did a Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I don't know, I don't speak Chinese.

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what do you call a middle-aged man with one blue suede shoe on, purple hair, pink skin, white eyes, no toenails, 67 fingers, 1 eye, a pocket watch, no clothes, and 8978967564567898765432345678765321234568909876543w245678909876543456098765323456-0987654367890-098765435678-09876543456789098765432345678909876543456789098765435678909876543234567898765323456890-987654345678900987654323456890987653234567890765434568909876543456899876543456789098765434568909876545678987654345678987654567898765434567898765478579458765456789876543223456789876543098765432123456898765432678987654230987653-098765434567898765434898765434567898765456787654567876 butt cheeks? bob.

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. Due to the height of the fall, one of his ribs pierced his heart and he also suffered extensive head trauma and internal bleeding due to the force when he hit the floor, where he lay in agony for several hours before dying a slow, painful death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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