Why did the chiken cross the road? It didn't, J-walking is against the law.

my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

Whats included in over 90% of all car crashes? A Car

You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

Hamsters are a lot like cigarettes. They're completely harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.

How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

Why do midgets laugh when they run? The grass tickles their balls.

What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. wow i missed the entire purpose of this.

What is worse than an 11 year old getting raped You getting caught

What did the caterpillar say to the robot? Nothing. Caterpillars do not have vocal chords and there are not, as yet, any truly portable robots capable of comprehending speech so to speak to one would be pointless.

Q: What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: The pizza does not scream in the oven.

Two boys go down stairs on christmas day. They fall and die.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

So a man walks into a bar. Unfortunately, he had brittle bone disease, cracked open his skull and bled to death on the pavement.

Whats big and blue and white and if it falls from a tree its sure to kill you. A fridge with a denim jacket on.

Knock Knock, Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock...

"bluar blah blah blarRR/ the stupid pointless part" dead people/ animals/ objects can't talk/ drive/ operate compueter, lol I'm so focken funni

what does lady gaga have that some people dont have? a penis.

What do elves get for Christmas? Overtime.

what do you call a shitty anti-joke? A shitty anti-joke.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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