Why is 13 the most hated number? 13 is Jewish.

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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a man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. The Bartender says okay, here you go.

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When SCUBA diving, why is it important to fall backward off the side of the boat? Because if you fell forward, you would still be in the boat.

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What is stupid, black and high? A stupid black kite.

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what do u call a kid at school a school kid and i have enough of these anti jokes they are not funny

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whats the difference between a black guy and and an asian person... who cares kill them both

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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how do you kill justin bieber? put a bag over his head and suffercate him.

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what was so bad about hitler? he inadvertently subjected his political officials to death by rope

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What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

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You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

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What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

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Why was the Mexican in the back of a pick up truck? There were not any available seats.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

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How many jews can you put in a four seat car? two in the front two in the back.

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What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesnt come back? A stick.

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If life hands you melons you might be dyslexic

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

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My mind is like full of holes so I cannot remember where I am anymore, and I am tired in addition, but say, what the hell is a tussle? Sounds cute, but what is that?

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A guy walks into a bar and falls.

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Im not random you just can't think as fa-bunnies

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What do you call a white guy with 5 black guys. The owner of a basketball team

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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