EVERYONE TEXT 513-550-3742 AND ASK HIM WHY HE HAS GOOP IN HIS PANTS. his names eric

Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

Everything makes me look good, Rape doesn't look good on anyone, and it hurts everyone involved

what did the little boy get for christmas? nothing his parents stuck him in a mental ward to forget about him because he was mentally challenged.

Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and not being funny.

How do you drown a black? - pop their lips

roses are red violets are blue get out of my face before i kill you

Why did they choose Madonna to perform in the halftime show? Because she might die soon.

Why did Jerry Sandusky rape little boys? Because his penis was hard and he needed to get his nut off quick

What did the deaf blonde say to the brunette? Nothing.

What did the plane say to the world Trade Center on 9/11? Nothing a plane is an object therefore cannot talk.

Why did the circus clown lose his balance? He had a seizure while on his unicycle, fell off, and bumped his head, leading to significant blunt trauma in the brain. Weeks later, after waking up from a coma, the doctors discover that he can no longer speak anything other than gibberish. His friends and family decide that he cannot go on living this way and decide to pull the plug.

Why do showers have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers

why couldn't the girl make her bed? she is homeless.

Why did the chicken cross the road? His family was experiencing financial troubles, and needed money. He tried applying for many jobs, but they just didn't quite work out. After ending up in the drug business to support his family, a deal went bad and he was shot, landing him in the hospital. The night his family arrived to check on him, the same shooter made his way to his room, and murdered his wife and 3 children, and somehow managed to evade police. Months after this incident, Ralph, the same chicken who was in the hospital and witnessed his family's murder, was finally released. He had nothing to live for, nothing to look forward to in the future. He took up alcohol abuse for some time, until realizing what truly had to be done. He began tracking down his family's killer, and with each day spent, he became closer and closer to discovering the dealer's whereabouts. One day, he finally figured out who it was. As he arrived at the killers' home, he took one last deep breath, then stormed in. After fighting through many of the dealers' body-gaurds, Ralph finally reached the notorious drug dealing murder, Froghorn Leghorn. As a bloody battle ensued, it was clear who the winner would be.. As Ralph staggered out of the destroyed home, bloodied, yet victorious, he realized something. All the tracking, all the killing, all the bloodshed he had created, was all in vain. He realized that taking Froghorn's life didn't, and wouldn't, bring his family back. Finding himself dumbfounded, he began to trot, head down, through the field where the bad drug deal happened, almost a year ago now. He took one last deep breath, looked at the stars, and took his first step on the road. This was it he decided, he was finally going to reunite with his family again once more. As the headlights raced towards him, he heard his family in unison whisper to him "You're finally home Ralph, you're finally home."

.why did 6 hate 7 and 8? because they were blocking her from 9!

Why did a white man get kicked out of the Olympics 2012¿ Because he did not have down syndrome

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

roses are red violets are blue i have no money could i have some

Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

What do you find at a black guys yard sale? A bunch of reasonably priced items since he comes from a low income household.

roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme others don't.

What's the difference between a duck and a popsicle? I don't shit on hamsters.

Why do cats have nine lives? Because they don't have ten.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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