What long black and tasty? Licorice

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What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

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Who is that? That is my daughter, She likes climbing trees.

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what did the cat say to the potato? meow

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If pro- is good or favored and con- is bad, then why do people favor the constitution and stay away from prostitution?

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A man walks into a bar. He walks out again remembering he forgot his wallet.

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

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Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

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whats floppy and smells like trout? trout.

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What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

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Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

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What is small, red, and can't fit through a doorway? A baby with a spear through its head. Posted By: Lram

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How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe Coolhsoj

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I know that a lot of people don't like morbid jokes, for it isn't everybody's cup of liquidized dead baby.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

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Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics ? Not being disabled

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your skull would make a nice pen holder

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what do you call a man that has a terminal illness and is named James - James

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was stressed & having alot of financial, mental and physical problems so he crossed the road in hope to kill himself. And he did he got ran over by a car, may his soul rest in peace.

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How can you ruin someone's day? Tell them their mother has cancer. No really, I found out my mom has cancer a week ago.

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why do police kill so many young black men in America? it's a difficult question that deserves a thoughtful response. many complex issues are at play, but we also feel a sense that something must be done. we cannot ignore some of the forces at work here, yet we cannot all personally take responsibility, either. or maybe he wanted to steal his girl. that shit really happens. THAT SHIT LEGIT HAPAPNES.

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(To the pretty girl at the bar) "Was your father a thief? Because I really would like to have sexual intercourse with you."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops