Why can't Michel Jackson play chess? He's dead

Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

Whats white and sticky? Glue.

A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

What's John Lennon doing these days? Decomposing.

A black man goes outside to shoot some hoops. He misses all of them because not all blacks are good at basketball.

bangers and mash?

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. ------ Knock Knock Whose there? Not Suzie

How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, If you do find one, what`s your plan?

Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

a girl had just gotten dumped by her boyfriend over a text message. she got very sad and became suicidal

This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

what did the man with Alzheimer's say to his son? who are you!?

Your Mother is so ugly that men tend to avoid her.

Why is the sky blue? Because it is

Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone? Because a skyscraper landed on him. Yes. A skyscraper.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

A dancer walks into a barre

Why is the sky blue? You like men.

How hot was the blonde considering she was in Africa for the first time and it was 103 degrees, very

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...