Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

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And if we met in 1780, I was a white southern aristocratic plantation owner and you were my dark skinned servant lady ... slave Whenever I could get away from the Mrs., I'd go to your shed and then I'd steal you kisses. But let's be serious, I'd still work you full time as a slave, there's a difference between romantic language and a complete disregard for socioeconomic trends.

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What's worse than getting sockson your birthday? Getting cancer on your birthday.

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Why was Michael Jackson so bad at dancing? Because he had a broken leg.

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Why'd the kid stick ice up his nose? To keep his lunch cold.

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What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of babies? One's used for bowling and the other's just sad.

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Q: How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a dog house, if your parents are a washing machine and a dryer? A: Trick Question, dog houses can't fly!

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what's the worst lie in the universe? I swear to god that was my last piece of gum

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Roses are red Violets are Blue Let's just screw

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Q:Why did the dwarf shout abuse at the bus driver? A: He had anger issues, and the price of the ticket was quite unreasonable.

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I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

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What do you get when you cross a Minotaur with a snowman? A cold mythological creature.

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A frog walks up to Steve, and says "Hey, Steve." Steve is terrified because a frog knows his name, and is walking.

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Malcom: Knock Knock. Jessica: Who's there? Malcom: It's Malcom. Jessica: Okay. Come in.

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whats worst than finding a worm in your apple???? an apple in your worm.

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What do you call a black man that nicks your car? All we can say is that he is called the Nig

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yo mummas so FAT to get to the other side

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What did the talking muffin say to the other talking muffin? Ah! A talking muffin!

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What did the White guy say to the balck guy? "How are you?"

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If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Deteriorate

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are the same.

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give a man a blow job and he'll come for a second. teach a man to blow job and .... no that just doesn't work

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What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

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How do you kill a Jewish person? Like any other person, they are like any other person of any race and religion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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