Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Watching your mum get sandwiched by two black guys...

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 has been convicted on multiple accounts of murder and Grievous Bodily Harm

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Why do cow say moo? Because you touch yourself at night

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Why did the boy fall of the swing He had no arms

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How you know when dislextic

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An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

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How do you get your dog to give you a blow job? You have to force him.

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the firefighter says to the other firefighter: hey firefighter, are we going to fight a fire?

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Why did little Annie fall off the swing? Cause her penis was too heavy.

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My gifts to my gf included: A diamond ring, a sports car, a house in malibu, a new credit card, a private jet, but most importantly, a Refrigerator.

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Maths.

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Why did they choose Madonna to perform in the halftime show? Because she might die soon.

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What did the hose say to the sprinkler? I'm gonna squirt you.

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And now a word from our sponsors

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Why do teens say "dude?" They feel unloved at home and must know that they posses a strong relationship with their peers, and in fact, cannot maintain a proper friendship due to the four letter word known as "dude."

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how do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The fridge is on its side, the door is torn off, and the ruined food scattered all over the floor. Not to mention there is an elephant in your kitchen.

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what's 2 + 2 ? 4, unless you add it up wrong.

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If you have a dinosaur, how many bicycles do you need to do your homework? Yes, because chewing gums would ask if Greg can go to the handball match.

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What is worse than ten babies in the street, eleven babies in the street.

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How do you get through a locked door? Unlock it.

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Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

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"Knock, Knock." "Who's There?" "Banana."

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what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

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Everything makes me look good, Rape doesn't look good on anyone, and it hurts everyone involved

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops