chickens, roads, horses, bars,roses, violets, sally, knock, knock, fnord

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It may be Stupid but its also Dumb. ~Patrick Star

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Two frogs go to the bar only to leave because frogs can't open up doors.

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Pain Olympics.

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Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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why did the black guy cross the street? to get to the package store.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

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Why is Short Circuit the best movie ever made? Because it tastes like lemons

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Someone asked me "What rhymes with Orange?" I replied "Door hinge." He punched me.

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Why did Jimmy burn the American flag? He was Canadian.

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what do you get when you cross a baby and a car a baby shaped dent, and a dead baby

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q: what do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex? a: sex, just like everyome else calls it

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your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

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Whats really ugly and horny Jake's mom

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What starts with "P" and ends with "orn"? Popcorn

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Why do jews have large noses? Genetics.

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Why should you never shower with a pokemon? Pokemon is a game for children. In doing so you would greatly disturb your child who is quite fond of pokemon

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Why does Larry the Cable Guy get his own T.V. show??? Why can't I have one of my own??? .......ah...forgot....I'm a minority...

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

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Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the barber shop, which was located on the other side of the road. He then walked to the crosswalk, patiently waited, then crossed when the little person lit up.

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Roses are Blue Violets are Red Watermelons are green Refridgerator

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Roses are brown Violets are brown who the hell took a shit in my garden?

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Whats black and white and red all over?? Half a zebra

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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