How much does Michael Vick love his dogs? More than Casey Anthony loved her daughter.

What is the meaning of life? Bill Gates: Windows Donald Trum: Money Some poor kid:luck and rich parents.

Why wouldn't Julius Caesar like olives on his pizza? Because he's dead.

There were two blondes at an ATM. One was entering her PIN number and the other one says, "Haha! I know your password! It's ****!" The other one replies, "Haha! No, it's 1358."

Your momma is so fat, that she decided to sign up for weight-watchers, and is now on her way to a healthy life

What do you call an African American sitting on a park bench? Elephant-man (I forgot to mention, he has a giant elephant trunk)

What do you call it when a black guy is talking to a white guy? A conversation.

Your mom is so ugly and stupid that people make fun of her and that's not nice.

How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the fridge door and place the elephant inside. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the fridge door, remove the elephant, and place the giraffe inside. There is a party at the zoo. All of the zoo animals attend, except one. Which one? The giraffe, because he is in the fridge.

roses are red violets are blue ill keep u in my heart forever and ower baby to

Why was the road crossed by the chicken? Because as an animal, incapable of understanding human languages and consequently lacking in education, it was unable to understand the convention of not using the passive voice in English prose writing.

life is like a rapist. sometimes they're nice other times, they ram you in the ass.

"George? I wanna tend da wabbits, George" - Lennie Smalls

when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

mary poppins' handbag is full of fuckin dick

Two blondes walks into a tavern, which is kind of funny, since the second one should have seen it.

why did scooba steeve loose his flippers? because his head imploded after reaching an extremley high pressure point at the bottom of the ocean. unable to live, his memory was a bit less persistant.

Knock knock Who's there It's a policeman informing you that your parents have been killed in a car crash. Your Dad, who has been struggling with substance abuse and depression, found out his wife had been cheating on him, and in a drunken rage, wrapped the car around a tree.

asians have slitted eyes lol

Why do cow say moo? Because you touch yourself at night

what's 2 + 2 ? 4, unless you add it up wrong.

Sarah Palin.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...