Yo mama so short she often has to ask you to retrieve items from the top shelf of her cabinet.

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what does 1 out of 15 people get cancer

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How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

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Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

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A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says 'Why the long face?' The horse says 'My alcoholism is destroying my family.'

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Why did the Grizzly bear refrain from attacking the hiker? It didn't. The hiker was torn to shreds within minutes.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always so happy? Probably becuase he's a highly succesfull multi-million dollor recording artist with 26 grammys and 1 oscar

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What colour is a black man in a freezer black

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

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roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

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if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

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You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

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Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

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I know that a lot of people don't like morbid jokes, for it isn't everybody's cup of liquidized dead baby.

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How did the person die? He got hit by a car.

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what do you call an animal thats black and white and red all over? an elephant

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Q. What do birds and a mouse have in common... A. Nothing there two different species

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ADAM SAS IS A GREAT GUY!

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Why is Blake dumb? He was in algebra one as a freshman. And his nickname is angry Blake

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was Hellen Keller.

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how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

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Hey man, you the tall one! Yes? Do you understand me? No. But you do overstand me right? Yeah, I overstand most people.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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