How do you make a hormone? Modify bacteria using recombinant DNA technology.

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What did the girl say to her ex? Fuck you.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar and order two beers

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An Irishman and his sheep are locked in a barn together for 3 days. On the 3rd day his wife finally notices that he is gone, and comes looking in the barn for her husband. She liberates him, cooks him dinner, and they both laugh at the bestiality that occurred in the barn. 3 days is indeed a long time for anyone to endure.

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What can you tell by a black guy who walks into a bank with a ski mask on? His face was severely disfigured in a horrific accident.

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what starts with f and ends with c k....???? FIRETRUCK

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Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad your whole family isn't dead from a fatal car accident?

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What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

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When Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the world, He broke his foot because every human being that kicks such a solid structure would break their foot.

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Why is 6 scared of 9? Because 9 is a zombie.

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haha women's rights.....what a joke.

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Mother Theresa, Billy Graham, and Joseph Smith walk into a bar. Just kidding, no they didn't.

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why was the boy sad his whole family just died in a plane crash

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why does clive keep getting crunk? because no girl satisfies him as much as geros

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Nice ass. Too bad it's cracked in the middle, though.

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A man walks into the bar. It was typical day and nothing interesting happened.

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How do you keep the crime rate down in a black neighborhood? Blow everybody up all at one time.

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Why was the chicken sad Thanksgiving

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My grandfather died in a concentration camp. He fell off a guard tower and broke his neck.

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sandwich. roller coaster. brain sprout. cholera, meander. time. rivet.porcupine. mayonaise. frying. x-ray forever.

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You know what they say about guys with big feet. They have big feet.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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