Mom mom momie mom mom mom mom momie mother mother. What! Hi.

Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

wife: why are women's feet smaller husband: so they can stand closer to the kitchen sink

What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

What is black and white and red all over? Zebra domestic violence isn't funny.

What's orange, brown, and blue? An orange, brown, and blue object.

It was Jimmy's 18th bday so his parents let him have the house to himself. He ate shrooms, fucked his turtle, then had his dick bitten off.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Listen, it's a free country.

Yesterday, upon the stair, I met a man who wasn't there. I saw him there again today; I've been sectioned. [L]

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 0

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

A hindu and a muslim walk into a bar. They start arguing over their different fundamental religious beliefs and then considering it is an american bar, an american christian extremist quickly shoots them both for being " from that part of the world"

Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

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whats the same about a donkey and a horse? They are from the same animal classification group.

What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

Ok is 25 really funnier than 24 because i think 8008 or 5318008 are way funnire tahn 24 or 35 just saying

Steve is getting paid $29.50 to bounce a ball Steve is getting fired monday

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

What do you get when you cross a black man and an octopus? I don't know, but it sure would pick a lot of cotton.

Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

What did the african child get for christmas? Abducted.

What happened to the Chicken who crossed the road? It made it to the other side!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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