Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

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There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"

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A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

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When life gives you lemons You've got some lemons.

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

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Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

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What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

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What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

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What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

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Dude man, I'm high...

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? To get into the USA for a better lifestyle.

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hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

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Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

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Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

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Beans, beans, the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more you have consumed.

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says "You have to stop masturbating." The man says "What, why?!" The doctor says "So I can examine you."

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What's worse than a wet sock? Being molested as a child.

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A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

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what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

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Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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