What happened to the boy who ate too much? He got type 2 diabetes

A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer walk into a bar. They order some drinks, sit quietly and stare at their shoes until they've finished their drinks, then go back home and wallow in loneliness, wishing their social skills weren't so abysmal.

Why did the jew go to the doctors? Because he had a severe headache.

Why did the woman have an abortion? Because she was raped at the age of 17.

If you dumb fooks keep swearing we are going to get banned.

Which is heavier, a tonne of feathers or a tonne of lead? It doesn't matter when your loved ones are being torn apart by bears.

How does a black guy die? Unknown

What is worse than ten babies in the street, eleven babies in the street.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My farts stink, And so do you.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because on the other side of the road people don't question his motives

You know what he said? How did you know what he said?

roses are blue violets are red and just like you they're messed up in the head

Why do black people like watermelon? Because it good you racist bastard!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his village has been ravaged by small pox.

Why don't some black men have jobs? Because they won't work

"Why did Jim Jones put cyanide in the People's Temple Flavor Aid?" Because he understood that adding sugar would be bad for their teeth.

What's tall black and has curly hair? A black guy

Suicide isn't the answer, it's just the solution. -by Ross

I'm a blonde... rejected from Kaplan.

Why do cats have nine lives? Because they don't have ten.

God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

How do you call the uncle who molested you as a child? More than likely with a telephone.

rock-a-bye baby on the treetop When the wind blows The bass will drop!

Billy and Joseph are playing Rock paper scissors. Billy says paper. Joseph proceeds to throw a rock as hard as he can at Billys face and sends him to the emergency room where he was later diagnosed with terminal testicular cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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