Q: Whats the difference between a Jewish man and a pizza? A: Jew's are humans and can feel emotions, as for pizza's can not feel emotions, because they are pizzas.

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What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

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What did the cat say when it stepped in poo? Meow.

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A man walks into a bar with a frown. The bartender asks, "Why are you sad." "My wife got brutally raped then shot last night."

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What's worse than stapling a baby to a tree? Stapling the same baby to ten trees.

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Santa Claus and eight reindeers walk into a bar. “Hey, fatty,” the barman shouts. “Where’s Rudolph?” “He’s dead,” Santa replied. “I’m sorry to hear that,” the barman said, looking embarrassed. “Let me get you a drink.”

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What happened to the Chicken who crossed the road? It made it to the other side!

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Chuck Norris was in a staring contest with the sun. He's blind now.

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Stephen Hawking is so paranoid, always looking over his shoulder.

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Whats the same between a baby and pizza? their both edible

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don't do anything i wouldn't do first

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. ( to heaven )

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whats worse than failing your maths test?

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roses are red, violets are blue, Hitler killed 6.6 million jews.

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What did the physicist say when he got his penis stuck in a test tube? Ah jeesh! I got my penis stuck in a test tube.

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A man walks into a bar. Splash.

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the bird.

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What did the homeless man find on the side of the street? A pile of dead babies.

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Why was the little boy hit by a bus? I pushed him

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why'd the chicken cross the road It didn't, it was safely placed inside a chook house

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Why did the Mexican mow lawns? He needed money to pay for his college tuition.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, I was asking you.

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A 10 year old underpriveledged boy goes to the second mile camp and meets his new counselor: Penn State defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky. The two bond very much and talk a lot. Sandusky invites the boy back to the locker room to shower because the boy got muddy. The boy takes a shower, gets clean, and goes back to his cabin. The boy has a great time at the camp and goes home.

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9/11 my birthday

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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