I'm trying to find out how many people in the world have Alzheimers, do you? No. Bananas.

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A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

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Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

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Neither have I

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One.

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2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

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Knock Knock Who's there? After no response, the man chuckled as he realized the sound of his TV mimicked that of his door knocker.

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what do grown up's do at night when everyone lese is asleep? Go to sleep as well

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your mom. Just kidding, it's the pizza guy. Pizza guy who?

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Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

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Three midgets walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer, the second one orders whiskey, and the third one ordered water because all three of them had agreed that he would be the designated driver that night.

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Patrick, I just thought of something funnier than 24. Lemme hear it. 25.

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What's worse then the bomb that went off in boston? The second one right after.

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Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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My Nan, that is all.

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The good part of "Age" of Ultron? THANOS REIGNS! Disagree? Just leave the green thumb and fuck off!

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Q: Why did Steve fall out of the tree A: He was raking the leaves

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- Knock Knock. - Who is it? - I am - I am what? - I am dying please help me. - Sorry, I don't speak with strangers.

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What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

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What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

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Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

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what is worse than gay sex wiping your ass with sandpaper

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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