Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

whats worse than 2 jews 3 jews

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did they chicken cross the road? It didn't. A van ran it over when it was halfway across.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a blonde at the beach? A dipthong.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why couldn't the man walk? He lost his legs when he stepped on a land mine in Afghanistan.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why don't woman wear watches? Because there is a clock on the stove!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q.How Do You Make 7 People Laugh? A.Tell Them a Good Joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michaelangelo.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Light travels faster than sound, thats why people look smart until they talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A man walks into an exam room for a doctor's appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's worse than finding half a worm in an apple? Rape and child abuse.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I'm a wise old man, so I'm aloud to touch you in the bathing suit area.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What time is it when an elephant jumps over your fence? Actually, elephants don't jump.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a man covered with cottoncandy and goes to the store and buys a jar of pickles? George

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the hardest part about watching a 2 year old get hit by a bus? Trying not to laugh.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's worse than a bee sting? The holocaust What's worse then the holocaust? Two bee stings

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: What did the hooker say to the priest? A: That was a wonderful sermon. I look forward to next Sunday's church service.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How is a raven like a writing desk? Both have absolutely nothing to do with the other one.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops