Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken is now getting flowers for her dead children that got hit buy multiple cars, also the chicken is a human mother.

Are you antijoke.com. Because you are a faggot.

What did little John do when he was bored? He went on Anti-Joke

Why did the plane crash? Chuck Norris was sitting in it, and thus his weight was countless times larger than the lift force of the plane.

Q. Why did Sarah fall off of the swing? A. She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sarah!

Q Whats the difference between a pich fork with watermelons and a pitch for with dead babies stuck on. A The pitchfork with the dead babies were severly shot in the kidneys and then the heart. Blake

once upon a time there was a chicken, it crossed a road however unlikely this chicken has become famed for its crossing and will be hailed for eternity. through the chickens actions thus the first anti joke was born

Remember that part where Jesus gets angry at a fig three and kills it because it "was lazy" for refusing to grow figs at winter? Brother Jeez, that was kinda mean man! You know it was winter rite? Anti Joke or not, that part is funny, so if Jesus returns and wants you to make him a sammich you better go get that goddamn sammich!

What's the difference between a brick and a baby? One is a fundamental item used in building walls and the other is a human

why was the boy sad his whole family just died in a plane crash

Why did the bakery run out of the business? They weren't making enough dough

Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tired of this joke.

whats the difference between harry potter and a jew? harry potter can escape the chamber

In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

What do you call a cat with a pop tart for a body and rainbows flying out of its butt? Nyan Cat

Why do black people always sit in the back of the bus? There aren't any available seats in the front.

Why didn't the black man make it into heaven? No one did, there is no evidence supporting the existence of an afterlife.

What's worse than putting stones in a blender? Putting a baby in a blender.

A man walked into a bar. He was treated at the local hospital with a minor contusion.

How did 3 fat women fit under 1 small umbrella and not get wet? It wasn't raining!

whats red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

pants on the ground pants on the ground lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground

What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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