"Roll back into the kitchen and imagine me a sandwich!" yelled the abusive husband to his paraplegic wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was the boy sad? He was harassed by his mum who died in the 1800's and went into a depressive state in which he drove himself to death using a pair of pliers and a rechargeable battery. No, he really just stubbed his toe.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

how do you make lady gaga cry you poke here face then rape here.

thumb_up thumb_down

What is yellow outside, black inside, and makes you laugh when it falls? A school bus full of black people falling from a clif

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he's not gonna come

thumb_up thumb_down

*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

thumb_up thumb_down

A man walks into a bar. and buys a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

thumb_up thumb_down

What is an offensive way to refer to black people from the time of the Flint Stones? Niggers

thumb_up thumb_down

why was the white girl not wanting to have a baby with her boyfriend he was black

thumb_up thumb_down

Your mom is so fat, that i don't think she's attractive anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a black man fishing. ... a fisherman racist.

thumb_up thumb_down

An Irishman walks into a bar. He died of alcohol poisoning that day

thumb_up thumb_down

Why are there so many smiths in the phonebook? Because they all have phones.

thumb_up thumb_down

2 blondes were heading to Disney world, they saw up ahead that said "Disney World left" then took a left and enjoyed Disney World and had fun on the rides

thumb_up thumb_down

A man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "why the long face?" he replies: "I was walking with my wife and was mauled by a bear"

thumb_up thumb_down

A Black man, a Latino, and a Midget get into a car. They drive to the county fair, get snow cones and ride the tilt-a-whirl.

thumb_up thumb_down

A chicken walks into a bar and orders a beer. Just kidding chickens cant talk and animal control was called

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a black man chasing after a macdonalds van? The fastest thing in the dessert.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to why did the bubble gum cross the road? it was on the chickens foot

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was the man happy to see his wife dead? He beat her

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I Couldn't afford a hair cut... so i purpposely contracted HIV

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops