Have you seen Stevie Wanders new house? No. Neither has he.

how do you wake up a really old man? you dont, he's probably already dead.

why is it good to be a fireman? because they save lives

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

If you call Dani a dog one more time, lick a gooch nut suckers. XoXo Jamie <3

What did the orphan get for Christmas? Cancer.

An Asian, a redneck, an Irish, and an Iranian walk into a bar. All but the Iranian were asked to go back to the parking lot and park their car to take up only one space.

what did the blind, deaf, paraplegic child get for christmas? other than cancer, nothing.

What did the shit covered people licking each others scrotums call themselves? The Aristocrats

Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

Q. what happend to the guy who walked by an alley in new york? A. he got beat up by a robber wich took hes money, cellphone, keys and his abillity to walk.

what do you get if you cross a retard with ruddell? andrew ruddel

Your mother is so stupid that she had to study, a lot.

Dont listen to your heart all it dose is BEAT BEAT BEAT

There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

Want to hear a funny story? So, these to kids have cancer...

(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

Why does it get hot after a basketball game? Because of the crowd all breathing out carbon dioxide and the high level of activity generating excess body heat.

What looks like a rainbow but isn't seen in the sky? A drawing of a rainbow

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

Q: Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because his body shut down due to the fact that a bullet went straight through his brain. This happened before he could even order his ice cream.

Wake up in the morning feeling like... Helen Keller

Whats black and white and red all over? Genital Warts...

Why was Osama Bin Laden so hard to find? His hiding place was difficult to come across.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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