(two firefighters are climbing an undersea mountain in Brazil) Why do elephants fear the natural causes of silver icecream cones? Because the cars in the parking garage jump the moon while doing jumping jacks.

A man asks his friend "what's black, blue, and red all over?" He repiles, "Nothing, because I'm colorblind."

What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I masturbate ?_?

What do you say if you see a black man with blood on his hands and he has a mask on? Thank you doctor for saving my sons life!

A successful, articulate, charming, well mannered, rich, young man walks into a bar.... Every night

What's the difference between Chuck Norris and Bigfoot? Nothing. Their both really hairy.

a man walks into a bar.... his? drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

A White, a Black, and a Hispanic man walk into a bar. They sit down and have a nice conversation, tip their bartender and then leave.

What is black and blue and red all over? My wife.

What's old, silver, and smells like old cheese? A fork with old cheese on it.

A man walks into a bar, he purchases a drink from the barman proceeds to finish the drink and then leaves.

that green thing is not a leaf, it's my sister

How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

Roses are red, You're a failed abortion, Happy Valentines Day. :D

Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

What do you call a cow painted in red a cat ( PS : i lied about the cow + the paint ! )

How many Dean Mckee's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He doesn't know what a lightbulb's for, nevermind how to use one.

An englishman, a scotsman and an irishman walk into a bar together. They sit down at the bar, and the barman says, "What is this, some kind of joke?!"

Why didn't the lawyer submit the car accident he endured to his local courthouse? He was dying of internal brain damage from the shards of glass lodged in his brain from flying through the windshield.

Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

i like candy and other things that are edible... please dont thumbs down just cuz this suxxx just put thumbs up and santa claus will haunt u :)

It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

a gay man got shot outside his house even though he was just checking the male get it checking the male

A man walks into a bar and says ouch.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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