What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

Your mother is of a healthy weight and a pleasure to be around.

What do you say if you see a black man with blood on his hands and he has a mask on? Thank you doctor for saving my sons life!

What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I masturbate ?_?

A man walks into a bar and says ouch.

a gay man got shot outside his house even though he was just checking the male get it checking the male

Friends are a lot like trees I just thought you should know.

My jeans

that green thing is not a leaf, it's my sister

What's old, silver, and smells like old cheese? A fork with old cheese on it.

How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

What is black and blue and red all over? My wife.

Roses are red, You're a failed abortion, Happy Valentines Day. :D

A man walks into a bar, he purchases a drink from the barman proceeds to finish the drink and then leaves.

golf is so gay i mean look at what they name the different clubs 3 wood 4 wood 5 wood 6 wood just give it a beat and you got a catchy song

Why was Joseph Kony at a primary school ? It was 3 o'clock and his children had just finished a long hard day learning to read and right and it was his turn to pick them up after him and misses Kony developed a schedule one late night after the odd glass of wine or two.

jimmy walked into a bar, then walked out crying and all desperate seeing his wife cheating on him with another guy sitting in the bar. he jumped in front of a bus and was taken to the hospital. He died due serious injuries. Turns out that it wasn't his wife but her twin sister that neither jimmy nor his wife was aware of her existence.

Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

i like candy and other things that are edible... please dont thumbs down just cuz this suxxx just put thumbs up and santa claus will haunt u :)

It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

How many Dean Mckee's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He doesn't know what a lightbulb's for, nevermind how to use one.

An englishman, a scotsman and an irishman walk into a bar together. They sit down at the bar, and the barman says, "What is this, some kind of joke?!"

Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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