Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: Someone who just got stabbed to death reading the newspaper.

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Have you heats about the Guy who's parents died in à car crash... No He killen himself because of hus parents Deathstars

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What do you call Chuck Norris being killed? This is impossible so we are not give it a name.

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What's long and black? A long and black object.

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So a clown walks up to you and asks, "What'll always STICK with you? The violent disposition of humanity."

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How many apples does it take to keep the doctor away? 1 if you throw it hard enough! haha

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How do you find a jew amoung italians? Through a dollar and see which one whines its not enough!

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what do you call cheese thats not yours? stolen, your under arrest

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A black duck walks into a bar. Duck: "I'll have a beer." Bartender: " How you paying for that?" Duck: "Put it on the tax payers."

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A little boy had a candle by his bedside. It fell over. The candle was fake, and it didn't burn down his house. When he woke up, he picked up the candle, put it back on his nightstand and had a wonderful day.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding Barney the purple dildo!

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Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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a blind man walks into a wall

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That awkward moment when your brother goes to crack his neck, but he dies instead.

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Why are soccer players sad? They couldn't play Football.

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Yolo Pierre because of Etzio tickle shits faggatron and individual nut join forces to become the shit suckers

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why are some people black? Because god decided there needs to be different people in the world therefore none are congruent

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What would happen if Obama got reelected? The economy would turn to shit.

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Of course, you have always found more joy in seeing others happy, that pursuing your own happiness.

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What's worse than failing a school test for Peter? Nothing, because he is asian.

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Why do women wear perfume and makeup? They smell bad and they're ugly.

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Woah, I mean if I was not like super high right now, I would totally hate you for that, you are what we call a charming asshole Nero, you can do that kinda stuff and completely get away with it, I feel like I should be really ashamed... So like does it work on everybody reading this? That would be wack, so much fun to do that.

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whats the difference between a grape and an elephant? the grape is purple

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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