A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

Knock, knock. Now before I asked "Who's there" I first opened the door as then I can see who's there without having to ask them through the door.

your mom.

What's cold, tired, wet, and starving? A girl up at 4:00 am that just came out of a cold shower.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

What's black and white and red all over and can't turn around in an elevator? A nun with a spear through her back

Dries Roelvink walks into a bar...

Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

Obesity runs in your family. To bad no one runs in your family.

What do Alzheimer patients think of the internet. Happy pi day.

how much kush does it take to get kushagra high

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

what happend when 3 white guys and 3 black guys try out for a basketball team? They all made it because you need 5 people on the team and it is good to have an extra person on the team in case some one gets hurt, fouled out, late for the game or dies.

So an irishmen, jewish, and asain walk into the bar...and the bartender said get out..

- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

What did the pirate say to the ninja? I have aids.

Disreguard Females Aquire Currency

Why was the blind man bored? - He was in a coma

Knock knock Who's there? No one ever mentioned someone named "there" it's me, Jim

What do you call a man with bananas in his ears? A doctor. He is clearly mentally unstable, and probably in pain.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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