there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

Knock knock Who's there? Dave, I've got a fucking gun. Let me the fuck in.

Jerry: Why arent you talking to me Seth? Seth then explains using sign language that he was born mute and is offended that Jerry keeps forgetting. Then Jerry uses sign language to say" **** off i have alzheimers!"

What happened when a Black man ran into a white supremacist? They exchanged insurance information

Why can't Hellen Keller play the piano? She's dead.

Whats worse then sneezing on someone? sneeze on someone and find out

What did the one Brick say to the other Brick? We have the same name.

Why was the woman in the kitchen? Because she is enjoying the meal her husband has prepared for her after a long day at her second full-time job of the day

What's worse than blowing out 1 lightbulb Blowing out 2 lightbulbs

what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

If Irishmen didn't walk out of bars, they would collect and eventually fill the bars of the world and would die given the bars could not support them.

Everytime someone says Jamie on this website, he's referring to Dylan, cause he's to insecure to write jokes about anyone else. Please direct all jokes at Dylan Hodge, 14 years of age, living in Queensland, Australia, come to his house to watch the f a g man, suck his mothers p e n i s.

Why did Hitler kill himself? He realized what he'd gotten himself into and became severely depressed

Why was the clock off? Because it was broken

What's worse then 10 dead babies in 1 tree? 1 dead baby in 10 trees...

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

A pretty funny pick-up line that probably doesn't work: "Hey, do you work at Little Caesar's? Because you're hot and I'm ready.

What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "come" on your face.

How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

A man went skydiving and tragically died.

Yo mammas so fat she wears big clothes!

What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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