A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

A Jewish man answered his phone one day. The man on the line said he'd kill him and all his family. The Jewish man then hung up the phone and resumed his everyday life.

Why did the young boy hit the other young boy? Because the other young boy was bullying his friend and he thought it was time he should stand up for himself and take control of the situation.

A fat man walks into a gym, and comes out fatter

Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are potentially dangerous weapons that may inflict bodily harm.

Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles there balls

What is the diffrence between you and I. I am not sure because i have not meet you yet

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm using my hand but thinking of you.

Q Why did the chicken cross the road? A Because it couldn't fly

What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

Your moms so fat she struggles to to everyday tasks

You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

What do you call a black man with a peg leg? Disabled

Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

How many babies can you fit in an oven? Depends how hungry you are.

HAHAH MY WORD IS HAPPY CLAPPY

What do you call a lot of Chinese people in a confined place? A Chinese urban center.

Two men fought over a bag of peanuts. The peanuts won.

What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

Who's the fastest kid in AA

What's worse than a dead baby? A dumpster full of dead babies What's worse than that? One is still alive at the bottom What's worse than that? It had to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It came back for seconds

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was suicidal.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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