- Knock, knock. -- How many dead babies does it take to cross the street and walk into a bar? - That's an odd question to ask to a visitor. -- Your mom.

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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What are astronauts called in Soviet Russia? Cosmonauts

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Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

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bangers and mash?

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Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

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What did the lawyer name is daughter? Caroline, in honor of his grandmother who died in THe Holocaust.

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Why was the boy laughing at Sally? Because Sally was a man

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how did superman die? he got cought in a plane engine!

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A Black guy and a Jewish guy walk into a bar. What does the black guy say to the Jew? "Hi".

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What's purple and fuzzy? A piece of purple fuzz.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the baby monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Killing your friend as a joke.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Physics. Why did Tommy fall of his bike? He was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Knock knock? Whos there? Knock knock. WHOS IS THERE?!?!? Knock Knock is, my name is Knock Knock.

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Why did the jew save his money? Because his wife has cancer and the radiation treatments are very expensive.

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What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

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What did Woody say to Buzz? A lot. There were three movies.

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What's worse than having to watch your dad rape your mom? Having to watch your mom rape your dad.

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What do you call an unconscious black man? An ambulance.

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whats black red and white. a zebra with a contagious red rash

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Why was the Jewish holocaust bad? Because it's joke always end up on anti-jokes and millions of Jewish people where murdered in it.

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What's the difference between a bench and a black man? The black man is alive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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