Q: What do you brush your teeth with, sit on and sleep in? A: A toothbrush, a chair and a bed

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Why was the blonde walking funny? She had a ten foot long metal bar shoved up her butt, and it was very painful to walk.

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why did the boy call the girl a bitch? Because she was beautiful.

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If life hands you lemons... Question yourself what just happened because life isn't tangible and has no way of handing you lemons, and even if it did, why lemons?

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What's more horrible than Twilight? Hitler.

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happy birthday! Its not my birthday! Oh i just assumed from your smell. That doesn't make much sense does it? It does. No it doesnt. Are you sure? Yes. Oh. Do i smell? Like chickens. Oh. I wish i were alive. What? Bobbing for apples? what? You smell like a toilet seat. Fine! You never spend time with me any more! I dont like you! oh. you know who nobody likes? Who? amanda burchell.

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q: why won't the asian girl do anything? a: it's pretty hard to move or speak being gagged and tied up in my basement

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What did Marshawn Lynch say? Yeah

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

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Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? Nope! I'm a person! - SMC Digital

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What's the difference between Jam and Jelly? You can't Jelly your dick into your girlfriend's ass.

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There are fewer coppers on sundays. As well as criminality.

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Steve is getting paid $29.50 to bounce a ball Steve is getting fired monday

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? People that make dead baby jokes.

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Who is Dank? A: Billal

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Why did the wolf cry boy? Cause he was a pedifile.

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

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Q. What does the kool aid man say when he breaks into a wall A. Ow

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why were the negros at whitney houstons funeral smiling? because there were free sandwiches!

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what happened when 3 had sex with 4? nothing numbers are not capable of sexual intercourse

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Your mama's so fat.... Her cerial bowl came with a lifeguard

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whats worse than having ice cream and not eating it? Being lactose intolerant

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a man walks into a bar, what does he say answer: oww..

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. They order a few drinks, chat, and walk out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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