How do you cause ultimate pain to a imprisoned Jew during the holocaust? Moral: You give him an apple WITH a worm in it.

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im trying to thing of a good joke...oh wait i got one but only one... ok ready?...oh wait...i forgot it again

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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A man walked into a bar.He woke up hours later and went home. By TheRealPaddock

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Why are many frogs green? Because yes they are.

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What is an antijoke? Not Knock

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Rose are red Violets are blue all I what to know is what do that mouth do

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

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what did the iphone say to the galagy s3? nothing they are phones.

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what has 2 legs and bleeds? Half a dog.

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What do you call a deer with no eye? NO IDEAR!

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knock knock whos there? dave dave who ? dave starts to cry because his grandmothers oldtimers has restricted her from remembering her grandson dave.

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whats big, white and will kill someone if it falls out of a tree? a refridgerater

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Yesterday i ate an owl with all the feathers on it

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How did the man know he was gay? Australia is full of kangaroos

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Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

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Forward this anti-joke to at least 15 people And absolutely nothing extraordinary will happen in the next 10 minutes.

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Chuck Norris was so good at karate that he held the middle weight world title for 6 years and was named fighter of the year by Black Belt Magazine. He also used his talents to start a successful acting and advertising career.

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"Spell 'horse'" "H-O-U-Z-E" "No, that's incorrect. You failed the spelling test, you stupid fool."

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David walks into a bar. Someone shoots him. Now hes dead.

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What's worse than failing a school test for Peter? Nothing, because he is asian.

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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if you want to see somthing funny, throw a small child imbertween two catholic priests!

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Q: A man walked into a bar and said, "Ouch!" Why? A: The man walked into a METAL bar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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