"Knock knock" "Who's there?" Not Sally because she has no arms ~Sally jokes

The Dalai Lama orders a slice of pizza for $2 and gives the cashier a $5 bill. He then realizes he hasn't been given any change, so he asks for his change. The cashier quickly apologizes and hands the Dalai Lama three dollar bills.

Why did the black man go to the store with a gun? He recently bought it a couple days before to go hunting, but it wasn't working correctly.

What did the prosecuting attorney say to the defense attorney? I hate you.

What's the difference between 10 dead baby's and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

What do you call someone who is bad at hand eye co-ordination? Dispraxic

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

Violets are blue and/or violet Roses are red so's my blood, see?

Its a bird!! Its a plane!! No, its a bird.

So this guy walks into a bar and– Nevermind it's really not that funny.

Q. What did the barber say to the Italian kid? A. Do you want your hair cut or should I just change the oil.?

What's a fry cook's favorite day? Saturday. It's his day off.

A Palestinian woman asks a man for directions. She is promptly stoned to death.

what did the monitor say to the boy? Im a Monitor

So i know this guy... yes? thats it.

An African-American is working on math problems and notices an Asian man walking by. The African American asked,"Could you help me out on these math problems?" The Asian man replied, " I have never been good at math."

whats the point of anti jokes? A: the point that it is no point

Aids, Black People, Cancer, Death, Retarded, Drunk, Sex, Black People, Holocaust, Blackies, White People, BLACK

Why did the tomato blush? It didn't, tomatoes are naturally red by colour.

What did the father say to his son, who incidently shot his brother while they were playing with a gun home alone? "It happens." He then hung himself.

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If it wasnt for christmas We would all be jewish.

What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

How do you keep children off your lawn? Touch them.

What do you give the person who has everything? A 20$ gift voucher

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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