a boy scout wipes his butt with a dollar cause he had no toilet paper then the other boy scout hears him screaming they meet up later and the other boy scout askes why he was scream and the first boy scout says that is hard to wip your butt with 4 quarters.

the teacher enters the room she sits in her chair and yells, "i am your substitute teacher. get out your books and write me a story."

Q Why did the chicken cross the road? A Because it couldn't fly

Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles there balls

What's scarier than a ghost? Practically anything as ghosts aren't real.

What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

What did the man do with the naked baby girl? He put some clothes on her and proceded to lay her down for a nap.

The original Moral Man has left Horsehead network, but I will keep monitoring this section for like 3 hours... Then probably never again on this shit site it barely works ffs! Moral: "Turn every stone, and you might find a penny, turn every penny and you might find a stone that stone is in our shoe, kick it away, crush it, destroy it"

Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? He needed money to feed his family and to pay for his daughter's college education.

Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies.

NEVER

What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge.

Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

A man crossed the road. A chicken stood in a doorway smoking a cigarette wondering why whenever he crosses the street his motives are always questioned yet men and other animals are allowed to go about their day normally. END CHICKEN DISCRIMINATION NOW!

I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

That awkwad moment when a homeless man runs naked around a golf cource yelling hears the 19th hole bitches.

Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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