what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

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Why did I get thumbs up from everyone? Answer: Because they like my anti-joke.

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A midget, a nun, and a kangaroo walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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I sas Ratzinger a sandwich when someone came up to me and said "sharing is caring" So I gave him a grenade He asked "where's the pin" I said " I pulled it for you" This is not an anti joke

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why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

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A buddhist walks up to a hotdog stand asks the server to make him one with everything

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Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

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Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

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Why do fat people commit suicide

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You're such a retard, you have to take special education, live with a mother that doesn't know what to do with you, not understand the real world, and have people look at you strangely for the rest of your life.

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Q:How do you confuse a blonde preschooler? A:Calculus.

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What do you call a cow with no legs. Dead, the farmer cut them off.

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You are the most beautiful person in the world.

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A guy walked into a restaurant. He sat down and had a lovely meal left the restaurant got in his car and went home. The End

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Why did the jew go to the doctors? Because he had a severe headache.

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Why did the woman throw a stick of butter out her window? She was mentally unstable.

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How many theropists does it take to change a lightbulb? -only one, but it takes a very long time and the lightbulb has to want to change.

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why did the plane crash?.............the pilot was a tomato

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What is worse than ten babies in the street, eleven babies in the street.

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How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

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What's the difference between a ball and a bouncy ball? A bouncy ball is bouncy.

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I have a really good knock knock joke. You start. Knock knock. Open the door see who it is and then slam the door in your face THE END

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What is the difference between a refrigerator? Seven anchors because blue isn't vital for turtles to fornicate.

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Johnny: I saw you long time ago. You were quite the school clown back in the day. Boy I remember back when I was just a whipper snapper we used play around and goof around all day. Whatdya think? Richard: Shut up, motherfuckingbitch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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