What did the fish say when he ran into a cement wall? ....Nothing fish don't run What did the fish say when he swam into a cement wall? ...Damn

Hey you know what? What? Never mind.

A man walks into a bar. He has a nice drink and leaves.

What's the difference between a bowling ball and a sorority girl? You could always eat the bowling ball if you really had to.

Sally heard a scream in a dark room and went to go see who it was. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally...

What did the college student do during her Spring Break in Mexico? We're not sure, she never came back.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him "why the long face?" "All horses have long faces" he replied.

What's worse than Monkey Ball? Super Monkey Ball. What's worse than Super Monkey Ball? The Holocaust.

Q: Why was the old man sad? A: Because he has a quarter super glued to the bottom of his foot

Micael Jackson enters a bar. Everyone screams, and then someone runs over and pulls the cheap mask off the impersonator's face. Michael Jackson IS DEAD, get over it

What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts.

What's worse than the WNBA? The Cleveland Cavaliers.

What's the difference between a Mexican and a T-Rex? Humans are vertebrates belonging to the Mammalia class, chiefly a member of the species Homo sapiens; dinosaurs are chiefly terrestrial, herbivorous or carnivorous reptiles from the extinct orders Saurischia and Ornithischia.

How did the black guy get knocked out? He was hit by a fridge.

Yo mama's so fat, that when she jumped, gravity pushed her back to the floor!

What's worst than the finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worst than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Finding seven dead babies in a trash can. What's worst than that? Finding one dead baby in seven trash cans.

Why is Keven's name spelled with an E Because his parents are black.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it all began in 1807 when a 7 foot rooster gave birth to a chicken on the sidewalk while purchasing ice cream. Scientists have been intrigued so they went into study with it and won the Nobel prize. This somehow persuaded them to lure the chicken over to the other side by using a lollipop. They threw the lollipop as the chicken crossed the road, hit it in the eye, the chicken spazzed out, jumped in front of a car, teleported to London, and is now a gynecologist.

don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!

All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

whats white a smells like paint. whtie paint.

Knock knock Whos there? Knock knock Who's there? Knock knock Who's there?! "is anyone home this is Helan Keller"

What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

Can Anti-Jokes censor curse-word tenses? Fuck Fucking Fucked Fucks

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...