An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walked into a bar. The Englishman ordered a lager, the Irishman ordered a Guiness, and the Scotsman ordered tap water.

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what do you call a black man sleeping on a park bench at 2 in the morning? Homeless

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When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

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rozes r read violots r bue i cannt soell causse ima bliend

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why was the Jewish person accused of stealing money? because the police found his finger prints.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because chad makes babies cry.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If it wasnt for christmas We would all be jewish.

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Bill is walking down the street when a girl who had a crush on him 20 years ago sees him, goes up to him, and says, "I think I know you, what is your name?". Bill says, "Timmy," and keeps walking because he is an asshole.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.It got ran over by a bus.

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Why did the wolf cry boy? Cause he was a pedifile.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Ted. Oh, Hey Ted.

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Roses are red, Wait. Why start this poem when you cant finish it Refrigerator

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What did the little boy say when he was asked what he wanted to be when he grew up? Adolf Hitler

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Why did the black man go to jail? Because he committed a criminal offense.

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The people who posted those extremely long "jokes" down there have no life.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: I didn't get to ask. He got hit by a car.

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Whats worse the losing your 3 kids, your lovely beautiful wife, and your trusty dog, all your belongings and in a house fire while you're at work? Nothing

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Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? Nope! I'm a person! - SMC Digital

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Who always participates in "No shave November"? The homeless.

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A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

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Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Steve is getting paid $29.50 to bounce a ball Steve is getting fired monday

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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